Daughter74

New plan for me, my dad and I planned for me and my family to go visit after his whole brain radiation this week. He's been putting off my visiting for a long time now. It's either that he doesn't want to plan too far ahead or he says his blood count is too low (he canceled twice before because of this). In my mind, he doesn't seem to want visitors. I think he doesn't want it to feel like people are saying goodbye (I may have said this before). Anyway, he just canceled again. Said his blood count is low, even though even he has said, in the past, when he gets a shot to help, he bounces back within a day or so, and we weren't going to be there until Saturday, we were going to stay at a hotel and would only stay an hour or whatever he could handle. We'd wear masks if he wanted as well. But it is clear to me he isn't into having us. He said his radiation oncologist thinks he can blast his brain mets away for at least a year. He's getting his chemo for recurrent SCLC but "feels great." And his wife won't talk to me or let me know anything. I'm going to just leave it in his hands. I can't force or make him want to see me. Only the good Lord knows what he's thinking. I'm just glad I saw him when I did and that I made peace with our tumultuous relationship and forgave us both years ago. Thanks to all of you for supporting me and being there for me to learn what I have. It meant the world to me. I certainly won't give up hope for my dad, I'm so glad for him that there are still options that I wouldn't have known about had I not come here. I'm sure I'll keep coming back to learn, and see if I could pass things on to him. You all deserve the very best care and health. <3

Sherry, I'm the daughter of a patient but I just wanted to say I'm thinking of you and hoping things go smoothly for you with your treatment. I'm so glad to hear your disease is limited. Stay strong and positive. I'll be sending you and everyone here my love and positive thoughts too! <3

Thanks so much Teri. And yes, hugs are so appreciated. Actually, that's something I'll always remember from my dad, he has this phrase: "feel my hug." I've always loved that, for whatever it's been worth over the years. And I do think he's having some really hard internal struggles for sure. I wish I could whisper in his ear that he's been forgiven by many for years now. He needs only to enjoy his family now. Can anyone discuss this news? Recurrent SCLC after six weeks, 80% regrowth of the lung tumor, metastases in the liver, bones and now brain? I just don't know if the brain makes things much worse or just worse. Thanks again to all of you. You're literally my source of info. <3

Thanks for your thoughts on this. I called my dad today. He seemed in good spirits but he got off the phone as soon as he could without being rude. He didn't talk about the MRI at all. I just kept it light and tried to make him laugh by admitting my kids, who I love dearly and my life revolves around, are grating on my nerves! It cracked him up because I've NEVER said that before! I told him I'm finally admitting I'm ready for school to start. He said he gives me credit for never having said that before now, my son starts high school and my daughter will be in fifth grade. He says he's impressed I held out so long! All that said, my dad has never seen me as his little girl, we've spent at least half my life not even speaking. His wife has been the wedge between us since I was literally a baby and I've not lived with him since he moved in with her when I was two. I think it's more about him not wanting pity or to acknowledge the severity of his situation. I also so vividly remember his wife urging him to quit smoking a few years back saying no one will feel sorry for him when he gets lung cancer. So I'm guessing he's dealing with shame as well, though is most definitely isn't coming from me. My view is that everyone should live their lives and no habit is better than another. I have no criticism of him whatsoever, only love. And forgiveness. Anyway. I texted my adult half brother. He told me the cancer has spread to his brain.

Thanks so much for this KatieB. How did your dad's treatment go? I'm so sorry you've gone through this too. I really appreciate the support I've gotten here already. <3 I haven't heard back from my dad since he called with his scan news. I know he got his results from his brain MRI and he started his chemo Monday. I'm sort of surprised he hasn't called because he usually does on his way home from the hospital. I'll try calling him tomorrow.

Thanks so much Tom. I really appreciate your help and kind words, as well as the links and definitions. My dad went a whopping six weeks. His tumor is back to 80% of its original size at initial diagnosis. He will have second-line treatment chemo starting next week. I've since read more and realize that his time frames aren't helpful to his cause but of course we will stay positive. They are using the Topotecan chemo drug five days in a row every other week I guess? They plan to do five rounds but during his first treatment, he was planning to do six and they stopped at four (I can't tell if it was because it was going so well or if it was because the side effects were too great). Anyway, we shall see how he does. I imagine he will have a scan sometime into his treatment? Am I right to say they will do chemo to see if they can shrink the tumor again, do a scan and see where it is and then either continue chemo (if it's going well) or discontinue it if it isn't helping enough? There was mention of doing a trial IF he makes it to Christmas?? I don't know what that's about. Shrug. My dad is very down about everything but he would never ever come to a forum like this. He's actually a doctor himself and I think he's experiencing so many emotions. I can't even begin to understand, but I hope to be educated and then be supportive of him in whatever way he will let me. We've had a hot and cold relationship my whole life (I've never lived with him) but I will always honor my father and would do anything to help him and hold him up through this. So thanks for allowing me to pick your brain and learn what I can so I'm able to pass it on by caring for him.

Hello. My father had chemo for four rounds (3 days in a row every three weeks for 12 weeks). Then he had a scan which showed either the tumor was gone or had shrunk down so small they couldn't see it (I don't live near him so I only go off of the limited info he shares with me). They stopped the chemo and he enjoyed life until he got a chest cold but he came out ok with rest and antibiotics. Well, he went for his six week PET scan and called to tell me the tumor is back and "it's bad." He never told me what happened to or how the cancer in his liver and bones were post chemo the first time so I'm not sure if they got better? They will do an MRI to see if he has anything in his brain. I also don't know why but they had once planned six rounds of chemo but then only did the four. Anyway. Can anyone tell me what this means? Is it normal to have it come back this soon? How effective will the chemo be this time around? He said he will go for five days in a row every other week. I'm worried about him and I know he's scared but I don't know what it really means. Any info would be helpful. Even some terms would be great, for example, what is it called if it comes back after getting better? It's not like it was remission if it only went away for six weeks, is it? Ok, thanks for th help.

Hello, I'm the adult daughter of a man who has small cell lung cancer. His is in his lung, liver, and bones. We have had a rough road in our relationship but I'm so sad for him and what could've been for us. I'm hoping to learn a lot more here and to become as good a support as I can be to him. Thanks.