kiams

Hey Gang, I have not posted in a long time, but I've been lurking in the shadows. The topic of fear struck a chord. I've been having a particularly tough time dealing with it lately. I to am starting my third battle with this beast. Last month I had my follow up scan. The was a shadow on my right lung that my surgeon was concerned about. He had me do a PET scan. It came back negative. He was concerned that I might be having some blockage due to scar tissue, so he did a bronchial scope. He said I had some inflamation, but he did not see anything that caused him concern. Nonetheless, he took a couple of tissue samples while he was in there just to make sure. Unfortunately, they came back positive for cancer. I met with my surgeon and oncologist. They both agreed that because there was no evidence of other spread that I had a localized recurrence. My surgeon recommended taking out the rest of my right lung. It said it would be a risky surgery because he had already been there two times, and I had radiation to the area. He was confident, however, that he could pull it off. I have tremendous confidence in my surgeon and have developed a very close relationship. I was willing to put my future in his hands. Then things took a new turn. The Friday before my surgery I went it for my pre-op appointment. My surgeon told me that at the weekly lung cancer tumor board meeting he had revied my case and the radiologist had noticed a small nodule on my back right below the incision from my first two surgeries. My surgeon did not think it was anything, but he told me he wanted to check it out before going into my chest. He said if it was cancer, he would close me up and not remove the lung. On the day of my surgery I woke up in the recovery room at 10:00am, not late in the afternoon as I had expected. I knew it was bad as soon as I saw the clock. The nodule on my back tested positive for cancer. I was devastated. Was the fight finally over? The next day I met with my oncologist and surgeon. They told me they were convinced that the tumor in my back was a "drop met," resulting from dropped cancer cells from one of my previous surgeries, not a normal metastasis. Given its location, an inch below my incision, and the fact that the nodule was small, encapsulated, and the surounding margins were clear, they were both convinced that it would be too strange for my cancer to spread to that spot and not any where else. They told me they wanted to wait two months, re-scan me. If it all looked the same, then we would do the surgery. In the meantime, they were going to put me on Tarceva and see what that did. I left the Cancer Center in much better spirits. My wife and I had a nice lunch and planned a trip to Disneyland with our ten year old son. I was back in the fight and still feeling like I would beat this thing. For the most part I have remained positive throughout this experience, but the last two weeks have been particularly difficult. We had a great three days in Disneyland, but since then I have been having periods of intense grief. I would think about my son growing up without a father, and my wife without a husband. I've been having a difficult time keeping it together at work. I'm a lawyer who is supposed to be a tough, thick skinned litigator. My work use to help me keep distracted, now I'm finding it increasingly difficult to focus. I'm still confident I'm going to beat this menace, but it is getting more and more difficult each day to stay strong. These next couple of months will be long ones.

I paid for chemo sensitivity testing after my last surgery. My Oncologist thought I was wasting my money, however, he ended up selecting the same drug shown by the lab to have the best result against my tumor. It was expensive, but it gave me peace of mind.

Z, I had four rounds. I found the side effects to be very tollerable. The worst side effect was the fatigue after the irst infusion of each round. It would usually knock me out of commission for a couple of days each time.

I was just curious if any of you have had experience with L'hermitte's sign or syndrome. It just started with me a couple of weeks ago. When I bend my head down towards my chest I get a tingling sensation in both my legs. I saw my oncologist today and he said it is probably a side effect of the radiation exposure to my spine. I see my radiation oncologist in a couple of weeks and hope to get some more information from her. My primary care doc ordered an MRI of the spine to be careful. My oncologist did not seem to think it was necessary, but thought it wouldn't hurt. What the heck, I've got nothing better to do on Saturday but spend a half an hour in a tube listening to load pinging and banging!

Patty, I had physical therapy after my first surgery. It was very helpful. I've continued to do the exercises they gave me and it has really helped my side and back. Keep pushing your doctors for a referal.

It will be two years next month since my original diagnosis. Taking life one day at a time and trying to stop and smell the roses along the way.

Have any of you visited the North Central Mississippi Regional Cancer Center. It is run by a Dr. Arnold Smith. He claims to use Immunotherapy along with conventional treatments and get better results than most. On his website, cancernet.com, he claims to have patients alive for years with lung cancer. Has anyone heard of this Dr and his success rate??

Great news Don. Hopefully you will be as good as new before you know it. It took me a few weeks, and then I felt like was back to normal.

Tiny, Congratulations on another milestone. Hopefully with each passing year you can put this thing farther and farther out of your mind. Kevin

Being a bad snowboarder led to my diagnosis. I injured my shoulder snowboarding. I went to see a sports medicine specialist who X-rayed my shoulder. The X-ray revealed a slight ligament tear in my shoulder. The doctor recommended trying physical therapy. I thought I was good to go. Two weeks later she called me and told me that as a matter of course they send all X-rays to be reviewed by a radiologist. The radiologist saw a spot on the small portion of my lung that showed up on the X-ray. I had a CT scan the next week, and the week after that I had surgery. It was quite the whirlwind. I never had any symptoms. I was not a smoker and had no history of cancer in my family. I was an amateur bike racer in the thick of preparing for the upcoming criterium season. I was training 10-12 hours a week at high intensity with no shortness of breath or any other symptoms. If I had not hurt my shoulder the cancer probably would not have been caught until it was too late. I thank God every day for making me a lousy snowboarder!

Stay strong and keep up your good humor. All will go well.

Sharon, You are not alone. It has been a year since my surgery and I still get pain in my back and right side. The area near my incision will burn when I stand for long periods of time, or if I am doing strenuous work. I got a referral to a physical therapist six months ago who gave me a series of exercises that have helped. I have really noticed improvement in the last couple of months. I concur with everyone else. A little discomfort beats the alternative. I tell everyone that the soreness in my side is a reminder of how lucky I was that this thing was caught. Kevin

Great news. Congratulations!

Cindy, Congratulations. I hit one year on April 30th. I'm now on the down hill slide to two years. Reading yours and others open and honest posts have helped me tremendously. I'm so happy that you reached this milepost. I'm hoping that all of us will continue to reach these critical points on our respective march to survivorship. Congrats again! Kevin

Debbie, I so understand how you feel. I am constantly looking at the techs and trying to read their body language. I was once so convinced that it had spread to my spine that I spent hours at the office running my fingers up and down my back trying to isolate the location. When the tests came back negative my Dr. just laughed and told me to quit playing chiropractor. My next CT scan is scheduled for June 8th. I'm trying not to freak out this time. So far so good. We'll see how it goes. Kevin