teresa567

Thanks for all the tips. It was a wedge resection and although the margins were clear, they were on the smaller side. Also, not all the nodes were sampled...the few that were were negative, but nothing was taken from the hilar region (a popular place for adenocarcinoma to "hang out" and "hide from scans). We will be going to see a popular surgeon at University of Chicago (Dr Mark Ferguson) as well as one at University of WIsconsin-Madison (AND following up with her original surgeon) ALL this week....hopefully with all of their knowledge and experience, we can make a decision. My mom is doing great. QUite honestly, she was back to herself right when she got d/c'd from the hospital (a 3 night stay). She had a brain MRI because of the adenocarcinoma diagnosis and the risk of spreading...results are pending. She feels great, a little "sore", but full of energy and life. She has come around to the fact that additional surgery may be needed and does want the cancer out....but still is hopeful she won't need it. Thanks again for your support and input!!! I am also going to post on the cancergrace.org.

Ah man....went through NSCLC stage 3B with my dad nearly 5 years ago and now here we go again with my 68 y/o mom. So a 1cm nodule in the middle right lobe was seen on the PET and chest CT (these were done for something else....she had no symptoms). On June 1st, she went in for a VATS procedure. The plan was to take out the nodule, do a frozen section while she was still in the OR and if it was positive for cancer, to take out the lobe. WELL...the initial good news was in the OR, the biopsy was negative....so they didn't take the lobe...closed her up. Today they took out her chest tube.....and the final pathology came back. POSITIVE for darn cancer and now the lobe is still in there. The doctor says we will do "the watch and wait" doing regular CT scans...but I'm nervous. research shows improved survival rates with the lobe coming out. The surgeon doesn't disagree with me...but this would mean another surgery!,, My mom is not thrilled about another surgery and is leaning towards watch and wait. I'm a nervous wreck and don't want her to make the wrong choice! Any thoughts?

Just hours after posting my last notice, my dad passed away. It was strange. My fiance, my mom, and I were in the room. We were surfing the web and my mom was dozing in a chair next to my dad. Right before midnight, I decided to go to bed. I got up and held his hand and told him I loved him. I told him I was going to be in the next room and that mom would stay with him. I also (again) told him it was okay to go even if I wasn't right at his side. I asked my mom (outloud) if she had told him it was okay to go and she said she had. He was still breathing slowly and it was now a few minutes to midnight (it happens to be his grandson's 7th birthday today...and we really didn't want the two to happen on the same day...but oh well). I was still holding his hand, but his pulse was weakening. I looked at him and he was still breathing, but things seemed to be changing. I moved to the other side of the bed and could only find a weak pulse on that hand. His feet were still very warm and his fingertips just started to get cold (he had a fever of over 103 degrees for the last 2 days in hospice). I put my hand on his chest and gently touched his forehead. I couldn't feel a heartbeat through his chest. He took one more breath...quiet, like a gentle sigh...and he was gone. It was beautiful and terrifying all at the same time. But, I know he is in a better place now looking down and helping all the rest of the lung cancer patients fight and WIN their battles! Please pray for my family as we face the funeral this Saturday...and as I face planning my upcoming wedding without my father. And please...continue to fight until we have a cure..because I know that is what he would want the most!

We seem to be going through this at the same time. My dad is in his final stages as I type. I'm terrified of the funeral and that I'm going to lose it. But somehow we will make it and stay strong....I'm so sorry for your loss. Our loved ones are on their way to a much much better place.

My dad went in to the hospital for a "tune-up" (iv fluids, rehydration, etc) last week Tuesday. His PET scan was due on Friday so they decided to do it inpatient on wed. (Mind you, he hates going to PET or MRI scans cause of his claustrophobia...CT scans were okay though ). I spoke with him Tuesday night and our last words were I love you. Wednesday I called my mom at the hospital and she said he was breathing kinda of crackly and lungs were full of fluid so they gave him some lasix. He was feeling better and wanted OJ and potato chips (what a combo), but he had to go to that darn pet scan. My mom went down with him. A few hours later, I was about to get in the shower and then go try on wedding dresses with a friend, but I figured I would call my mom to see how the scan went. She answered and told me something was wrong and that there were a ton of people in the room. She said on the way back from the pet scan, his breathing was horrible. He went into full respiratory arrest. I was so terrified and full of panic. I was thousands of miles away in california (they are in wisconsin). My dad never wanted to talk about death or what to do when he got to that point. "I'm not there yet" he'd always say. He just wanted to fight, fight, fight. In the room, I could hear in the background, was total choas. My mom found a MD to talk to me and they thought they he was pulling through, but he wasn't. He started to code again. They got the attending oncologist on the phone and gave me his blood gas results...he was in bad shape. They had to intubate or pretty much let him go. They wanted to let him go, but I wasn't ready. I needed to get there. So they moved him to ICU and started up all the meds....while I ran around like a crazy woman packing up my bags and quickly getting a flight that would leave in 1.5 hours. I was such a mess at the airport..i have never been so dyfunctional in my life. When I got there, he was sedated, intubated, on meds for his falling BP, his kidneys were failing,...it was bad. I slept there that night with my mom. The next few days he improved a lot. All we wanted was him to get a chance off the vent and maybe get to talk to him for probably the last time. As they weaned his sedation, he communicated with us through his eyes, his eyebrows, and his hands. He got to reconnect with children he had lost touch with from his 1st marriage. He was encircled with love and prayers. We laughed and joked and talked with him about so many things, even though he couldn't technically speak back. We knew deep down he was scared to die and we tried to our best to comfort him. Sunday was his 75th birthday which he told me mom earllier that week he really wanted to make it too....and darn it he did, We withdrew support on Monday...his family at his side. He was awake and knew we were there...he agreed to have the tube out....but I know his plan was to still fight. He wasn't ready to give up. We took it out and his throat was too sore to talk, but when my brother and I told him we loved him, he mouthed it back. He slowly lost consciousness as his struggled with his breathing. We gave him some sedation and pain meds as needed to comfort him and moved him to the pallative care unit....where he continues to fight to this very moment. I'm sitting here watching him breath comfortably for the first time in a long time. His mind is not really with us...but his is calm and peaceful. I think I'm ready. He won't make it to my wedding after all (we moved it up to this september...but he still didn't make it) We continue to gather in his room and tell stories, laugh, and encourage him that its okay to go. So far, after we pulled the tube, I have felt the weight of the world lift from my body and an inner strength I never ever imagined I would have. The funeral may be a different story, but for now, I feel at peace. I wanted to write all this to let out our story and to let others know....that we all find peace and inner strength when we need it most. The last four years of my life have been such a rollar coaster and I never wanted to let him go. My dad's fight with cancer will soon be over, but it is not lost. Please keep us in your prayers during this time and pray for him to let go and enter the kingdom of heaven. Thank you all for your time and wish me luck with my wedding....I'll be back for more support when it draws near this fall....I can't imagine it without my daddy.

He started chemo today, but he also saw his doctor today. The liver is worse than expected...the onc said the chemo worked before and it can work again, but that extensive liver mets are tough and can take a person quickly. The picture doesn't look too pretty. He also has one on his tailbone, which doesn't concern anyone nearly as much as the evil liver ones. Anyone else deal with liver mets? I know some of you had asked when our wedding was planned for. My fiance and I just got engaged about a month ago and planned to wed in summer or fall of 2008. We were just starting to plan our wedding in California (my dad lives thousands of miles away in Wisconsin, but grew up in california and planned to come here for the event). Weddings are very expensive these days and we are paying for it on our own (almost 4 years of cancer drained my family dry financially). So financially, moving it up and also moving it to wisconsin may be very tough. I also am a firm beleiver in pre-martial counseling and not getting caught up in the wedding planning or rushing to the alter. We really planned to use the next 1.5years to prepare ourselves well for marriage (we don't want to end up in the statistics of 1:2 ending in divorce) and take our time. Both our sets of parents are still married and we want to do everything we can to have wonderful marriages like they have had. I also just don't know if emotionally I can handle it.....I feel like it would be giving my dad his last rites and would take away any hope he has left (which is dwindling). He knows we planned on 2008 and he knows we were planning it out here....so there is no hiding why we would be changing it. Man, this just really sucks. The cancer and possiblity of losing him soon is bad enough, but trying to throw the wedding (one of the happiest days of my life?) into the mix is not working well. I wish I could say I could simply ask him what he wanted, but he will not talk about anything "death" related...he could never even tell us what he wants in terms of burial and cremation..etc.... It gets him crazy depressed and negative...and I can't do that to him. I just don't want to make the wrong decision.....thank you all for listening.....Teresa

I'm sorry the results were not good. The emotions are crazy and very hard to deal with. I think the hardest is hearing your loved one want to give up or say they have nothing to live for. My dad will often cry and tell my mom he feels like such a burdon to his family and it kills us all. Other times, he's the most positive cancer patient in the world. Roller coasters..... You're not alone. Nor are your children. Some cancer centers offer support groups for kids whose parents have cancer. They really help them process their dad's emotions and their own emotions...which is important. If your husband doesn't want to go to support groups or take meds, maybe he'd feel okay meeting privately with someone 1 on 1? Or, meeting with someone at a local chuch (even if you guys are not religious..sometimes at times like this, reaching out for something spiritual helps people cope). Don't focus on the statistics either...we were told my dad would not make it more than a year....it will be 4 years in Feb 07...and his quality of life has been pretty darn good up until currently!! Forget the stats....the mind is such a powerful source of healing...God Bless You Guys. Try to stay strong...you WILL get through this. Teresa

Thank you all so much for your thoughts and ideas! My dad is starting back on chemo (taxotere) tomorrow...it was the last drug he used and he got 3+ years out of it...so his MD (who has become part of our family over the years) wants to give it another try...hopefully it will knock the cancer back down again for awhile. The side effects were minimal and my dad is emotionally and physically ready to fight...so here we go. If there is more growth after 2 cycles of taxotere, he'll switch to Altima!! Its weird...he has these liver and bone mets but NO symptoms from either. Has that been anyone else's experience? The other thing that bugs me is the liver mets did not show up on the CT a month ago, but did on the PET scan? Can we really trust these CTs or do you guys get periodic PET scans too? This was his 2nd one (the 1st when he was diagnosed), but it seemed to see so much more! Thanks again!

My dad used a fentanyl duragesic patch with great pain control for a long time. It didn't have any side effects for him like some of the oral medications did. When he didn't need it anymore, they weaned him off without a problem!

Wow. I haven't posted on here in so long mostly because things had been so good (stable) for 3 years....and now, just a month after I got engaged, his cancer is back and spread to his bone, liver, and pleural space. We're all in shock...and I'm so scared that this is now the beginning of the end. So many questions....do I move back to Wisconsin now (I live in California) like I did when he was first diagnosed? Do we plan a quick wedding so he can be there or will that be a horrible experience for everyone knowing that it is likely his "last" big family event? I don't even want to think about planning a wedding with him getting sicker, but people keep warning me that someday I'll regret it if I don't do it before he dies. How can I be happy planning a wedding? Is it wrong to not want to do all this "in case" he dies? Does anyone have any thoughts (since we all know what cancer can do to our life plans)?? But, maybe, when he starts chemo again, it will buy him more time...the cancer will stop growing again. His cancer had never left his lung before so I don't know what to expect? Has the chemo helped you guys stop the growth in other areas? Is there still hope or should we prepare for the worst? I don't want to lose hope but I know we have to be realistic too. For all of you reading this, thank you....it is really hard to stay strong for him when I'm so scared and sad! I'm glad I can let some of it out on here. Please pray for us. Teresa

My dad had taxotere as a single drug for second (or third) line treatment and has had stable disease ever since (and that was over 2 years ago). He has advanced lung cancer (see below) and the taxotere has bought him LOTS of extra time. He had mild symptoms and I beleive needed blood once or twice. It did cause his plueral effusions to increase in size, but it was manageable. Good luck to you guys!

Thanks so much for the information. It would be great if we could adjust my dad's Lovenox dose so he could get just one shot per day....right now he gets 80mg BID. What would you suggest and I'll run it by his oncologist?? Thanks again so much for your time and knowledge, Teresa

My dad had a DVT with a small PE while hospitalized for complications from chemo over a year ago (his cancer hx is below). They put him on Lovenox and have never taken him off. His insurance covers Lovenox so cost is not a factor (thank God). I guess my question is would he otherwise be placed on coumadin long-term or do some docs just d/c blood thinning tx after a certain amount of time? He really has no side effects from Lovenox (beside scar tissue encircling his entire abdomen...poor guy)....and he beleives that part of the reason he hasn't had mets yet is b/c the Lovenox makes his platlets less sticky (some potential theroy we have read along the way). Is the lovenox still necessary? Thank you so much.

It sounds like you and your family do not have a lot of confidence in your doc at this point (and I don't blame you). If your dad feels he can withstand some more treatment, there will be a doctor out there that will find a treatment to try. It would be another story if dad was ready to give up but his family wasn't (I think that's what will happen with me...I can't stand the thought of losing my dad). A lot of it comes down to quality of life....if he's comfortable where he's at...check out another doctor at least to see what they reccommend!! You'll be in my prayers.

A few weeks ago my dad urinated a large amount of blood and I posted on here to get some info....here's my update!! My dad saw a urologist and they did a CT and a scope....all they found was an enlarged prostate with blood vessels on the surface. Since he's still on lovenox (a blood thinner) for an old blood clot and PE it makes it extra easy to bleed. The MD said there is a very small chance he could have very early stage prostate cancer, but the chances of that harming him in the next 15-20 years would be almost nil. So...just thought I'd update in case anyone else runs into this problem...especially if you are on blood thinners!!