barbara w

First let me say how sorry I am for the loss of your father. My dad passed away just seven weeks ago, and in some sense it still seems unreal. I also was my dad's caregiver and was with him when he died. He passed away on a Wednesday after a day and a half of a coma. Monday was his last good day. He was up and talking, eating and seeming himself. He talked a lot that day and other days about a man that was building a house for his wife and child. He kept asking if we could see him( We think it might have been his dad - was a house builder in Ireland.) Tuesday morning was the beginning of the end - the most we got from him were some "I love you." My mother swears that she heard him say the name "Ned" that morning. Ned was his younger brother who died 20 years ago. After 9 a.m. Tuesday he really said nothing else and late Tuesday night was definately in a coma. Wednesday brought more of the same. We were all with him - my mother, sister, his sons-in-law, and his sisters. We talked to him privately and as a whole. We said the rosary around his bed at about 3:30 and at 3:40 he was gone. Now my dad's eyes hadn't opened since Tuesday morning, but with that last breath he opened is eyes - looked first at me on his right side the looked to my mother and sister on his left, and then straight ahead ( where no one stood) after that last exhale. So many people there noticed the recognition in his eyes. He knew I was there, with my mom and sister, and I feel that he saw someone at the foot of his bed. I pray every night that his brother came for him - it's the only comfort I have.

My dad passed away peacefully at home on January 12 surrounded by his family. He had been on the Iressa for three weeks when his confusion and weakness seemed to get much worse. When his visiting nurse heard some fluid in his lungs, she recommended hospice on the Friday prior. We did one course of antibiotics while under hospice and he seemed to improve. Monday was his best day in a long time - he ate three meals, had a good energy level, was much clearer in his thoughts, and had little pain. He didn't even want to go to bed on Monday night. Tuesday morning he was hardly responding - no food or water intake, couldn't swallow his meds, or stand alone. We started morphine and got him a hospital bed and by Wednesday afternoon he was gone. I can't believe that it has taken me this long to post this. I have been on this site a few times, reading other's updates, but I just couldn't bring myself to post. It's almost as if I couldn't type the words. My heart is empty yet I'm not sure if it has really hit me yet. My days seem so long and foreign without him. We had spend so much time together this past year with drs. appointments, etc. We lived on the same street, so he would help me care for my twins, now 18 months, when they were very young and before he was diagnosed ( when life was normal). I've been robbed of my dad and one of my best friends. I'm rambling now, so I'll end this. I will continue checking in on the many of you who offered me so much support and help these last 11 months, and my prayers are with you and with the search for a cure to this damned disease.

Prayers are going your way.

I along with all of these wonderful people here am pulling for you. Know that you are in so many thoughts and prayers. Keep your spirits and your fight up.

My dad had WBR at the same time, and he's not showing any signs of growth yet. His rad onc told him three months from the loss until he sees some growth.

We need to hear good news! Thanks for sharing - now go and enjoy this holiday season.

I was just thinking of her the other day - I'll be praying for her.

I am so sorry for your loss of your mother. My condolences to you and your family. barbara

I feel as if the floor has caved in. My dad began Iressa on Tuesday, and we were pinning so many hopes on it. I just can't believe this. Where will we go from here?

You can always begin treatment with the chemo, and seek a second opinion if you're still not sure that surgery might not be the better route. These are such hard decisions - I'll be thinking of you.

I love that you said he's coming home to live the rest of his life - you're so right. Make as many happy memories as you can together over these holidays. Barbara

I am so sorry for your loss. I know how much strength you must gather from the close relationship you had with your dad. My prayers are with you, your dad, and your family. Barbara

Lisa and Tariq, Please accept my condolences on your loss. Hold on to each other and know that so many people here have you in their thoughts and prayers. Barbara

Thanks everyone for your responses and care - we're going for a dr. visit today, so we'll see what happens. Over the weekend he's been acting really strange - almost like a form of dementia- which I medication related. He's still as strong as a bull, just really dopey. I'll let you know how it all works out. Thanks again.

Sending prayers that Tarceva does the trick! All the info I've read on it sound promising. Best wishes.