Leslie221 Posted August 10, 2005 Share Posted August 10, 2005 "On a large enough time line, the survival rate for everyone will drop to zero." Chuck Palahniuk quotes (American freelance Journalist, Satirist and Novelist. b.1961) Most survivors in this family have said more than once "I am not a statistic" or "Forget about the statistics." And I agree totally. I left my first oncologist because I felt he had already decided there wasn't any use doing anything but keeping me comfortable and THAT just WASN'T okay with me! Have any of you ever had the experience of having to convince someone else that you don't care what statistics say - say a frightened loved one or doctor with an unacceptable attitude? Just wondering, Leslie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ann Posted August 10, 2005 Share Posted August 10, 2005 Leslie....I know my response may be a bit different from what you expected but here goes. When Dennis was diagnosed with sclc, I immediately combed every internet site possible that dealt with lung cancer. I had statistics pouring from my head and, considering the type of cancer Dennis had, none of them were good. I think I kept searching, hoping to find just one positive report that would have positive statistics. Well, thank goodness I finally found the board that this one branched from. The members convinced me to throw all those statistics right out the window. I did and from that day on, I never allowed myself to think of Dennis as one of those statistics. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SDianneB Posted August 10, 2005 Share Posted August 10, 2005 Same here, Leslie. I changed Oncologists because it seemed to me he was more interested in telling me how dire my situation was than in how he was going to help me. Even when I would have good news, he started in on the negativism first thing, so I found another doctor. Dr. Gloom & Doom is still there, and I see him now and then in the hallway. IMO, he should be limited to research and not allowed around patients, because I hear him say the same kinds of things to other patients now and then. Too bad. The Oncologist I see now is very much in tune with me and how I feel about treatments and quality of life issues, etc. She gives lots of hugs, smiles a lot, gives me "A+" for good exams, and tells me what a "tough ol' bird" I am. What she's done over time is to gain credibility with me -- very important. Doctors are also humans. And we don't always get along with every human we meet, so I wouldn't expect anything different from physicians really. Maybe some patients like hearing all that, but I surely didn't. Di Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leslie221 Posted August 10, 2005 Author Share Posted August 10, 2005 Ann, I read that quote and I thought about my own searches for information in the beginning and how I was buying into the statistics as ABSOLUTE TRUTH mindset. It was those darn statistics that made me so afraid for the first time! And sometimes, I think, it's those darn statistics that keep some doctors from offering treatments that could really make a difference. I really believe I didn't accept myself as a SURVIVOR until I decided to reject statistics and the physicians who were too quick to want to surround me with them. The topic's just a conversation starter - take it anywhere you want! Leslie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dadstimeon Posted August 10, 2005 Share Posted August 10, 2005 Great Topic Leslie! It's been my experience people underestimate what a lung cancer patient (I get it all the time I don't look sick/act sick/sound sick, they are really surprised when they see me) should/can do to battle/survive/live a life and over estimate lung cancer statistics to the point of dome and gloom. Lost count how many times I had to say to someone I'm glad I'm not in a boat with you taking on water. You (meaning them) would be bailing the water into the boat while I'm trying to bail the water out of the boat. It's like you said in one of your post's. All perception and how one looks at it. Rich Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trishnmiller Posted August 10, 2005 Share Posted August 10, 2005 I hear you. When Jeff was diagnosed I told the oncologist that I was fully aware of the prognosis for Stage IV nsclc BUT that I still wanted to be as agressive as possible starting with using Gamma Knife for his 8 brain mets. The onc agreed with me and then ,at the first visit prescribed 3 rounds of pallative whole brain radiation. In other words..he lied and knew he was lying.I was livid as that is not what he had agreed to in the hospital. So we walked out and never went back. I searched and searched until I found someone who would do what I knew was the right thing. There are statistics and Jeffrey is right up there in the top 5%, LOL. Trish Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daggiesmom Posted August 11, 2005 Share Posted August 11, 2005 I have never been treated as a statistic. My doctor, right from the start told me "we're going for a cure". No hesitation, no waivering. He inspired full confidence. I was blessed to have found him. Statistics are the enemy. Believe in yourself and forget the numbers. I truly wish everyone on this board to have as great a doctor as he is. I really believe that a positive attitude helps you in life. It helps you with everything. Joanie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leslie221 Posted August 11, 2005 Author Share Posted August 11, 2005 Amen, Joanie! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SDianneB Posted August 11, 2005 Share Posted August 11, 2005 That's what I got at first too, Joanie - from the wonderful Pulmonologist who put 2 and 2 together and diagnosed me. He was very positive, and then when I had to face the first Oncologist, Dr. Gloom & Doom, it was a total reverse. So, I got another one. When I first saw the Radiation Oncologist, he was very positive too. So, at first, I had one bad apple out of the three, and even the bad apple is a very intelligent physician whose time might be better spent in the research lab away from other people! It can make a huge difference as we all know. Di Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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