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Michele

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Hello everybody haven't been here for awhile. As I mentioned my husband last scan in Nov for small cell shows he is in remission. This January he was very tired for 2 weeks we assumed it was side effects from chemo and Radation.we would go out to eat and he would practically fall asleep at table. Then one night he said he was up all night feeling he couldn' breath right he did not wake me up! In the morning I took him to er and he wound up being there for 12 days .he wound up with a depliberator / pacemaker.his heart pumps only 30% plus he has heart disease. He has been home recovering now for one week and this seems like it a slow process.poor guy he just got over treatments and started to be happy about his scan; and this set him back. We go for his next scan for his cancer sometime in February and I'm praying he is still in remission.plus I go for my next scan in March. As a care taker and a Survivor of lung cancer only a year I sometimes worry with all this stress  that I worry about cancer coming back on me and him.when do you stop worrying? I am staying the course but there' always back in your mind a dooms day. Which deep down inside makes me very unhappy.as much as I try to live each day to my fullest there is this feeling of fear. Well thanks for listening. God bless everybody. 

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Hi Michelle, 

I'm sorry that your husband is now dealing with a heart problem as well as lung cancer. I don't think there's an answer to the question "when do you stop worrying?"  I think everybody with cancer or who has family or loved ones with cancer worries. It's a question of how often, how much and how worry affects our  life. None of us, whether we have cancer or not knows what the future holds for us. I have had 3 cancers and I'm NED on all of them, but any of them could recur, or I could be run over by a truck tomorrow. Having had life threateing illnesses has made me more aware of how valuable my life is, and I don't want to waste it with worry. I do of course, waste some of it with stress and worry. I try to take each day as it comes and to be grateful for it. Sometimes I succeed at this, sometimes not. 

Hang in there

Bridget O

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On 2/3/2018 at 10:35 PM, BridgetO said:

Hi Michelle, 

I'm sorry that your husband is now dealing with a heart problem as well as lung cancer. I don't think there's an answer to the question "when do you stop worrying?"  I think everybody with cancer or who has family or loved ones with cancer worries. It's a question of how often, how much and how worry affects our  life. None of us, whether we have cancer or not knows what the future holds for us. I have had 3 cancers and I'm NED on all of them, but any of them could recur, or I could be run over by a truck tomorrow. Having had life threateing illnesses has made me more aware of how valuable my life is, and I don't want to waste it with worry. I do of course, waste some of it with stress and worry. I try to take each day as it comes and to be grateful for it. Sometimes I succeed at this, sometimes not. 

Hang in there

Bridget O

This is a beautiful response, Bridget O!

Michele, I'm very sorry that you and your husband are dealing with a second illness. I hope he continues to show improvement and that you get good results on the upcoming scans to help lift everyone's spirits! We are always here for you.

With gratitude,

Lauren
--

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Michele,

Sorry I missed your update post.  I've been down with the flu and am falling behind.

So, let's talk about fear.  What is it, really?  It is an emotion with both a downside and upside.  We fear things or events that we don't understand.  We fear uncertainty.  Fear is a primal emotion.  We will never conquer it.  But, there is upside -- fear is such a powerful emotion it causes us to learn and grow from the experience.

Your beloved husband is struggling with two serious diseases: lung cancer (hopefully resolved) and heart disease.  Your fear is understandable because the outcome is uncertain.  But life for all of us presents an uncertain outcome in terms of duration. Few of us ever know when we will die; all of us know we will die. You helped your husband find joy during his cancer treatment.  Take the same course with his heart disease.  Help him find a moment of joy each hour, each day. 

As for worry, my survivor experience taught me a most important lesson. Today, I only worry about those things or events I can control.  The Lord's will handles the rest.

Stay the course.

Tom

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