Guest makwa_04 Posted June 7, 2004 Share Posted June 7, 2004 Found this weekend has been full of highs and lows. Still problem with food staying down. And to be honest really am not hungry. The mental battle seems the worst one to attempt to control. One minute feeling great {mental wise} next shot down like a duck in duck season. WAY to many people stopping by with their favorite snake cure all food and recipes.. Cant these people understand I cant keep the crap down??? There has to be some degree of semi privacy,where one can rest his body and mind. Having to screen calls now, as people seem to not care when they call or If I answer how long they talk. Also things like well what are you going to do with that tool set or that ole gun you had blah blah blah Seems like they are stopping by to see if they can get anything DAm Vultures!! Others now they have found out i have the big C have shyed away.. as if its catching or something. Its bad enough to have to handle all this as is alone more or less and taking care as best i can of a 87 yr old also Now to have people contacting me i have not seen for 20 years?? Basic Human nature sucks Sleep is better with the meds until they wear off... Food seems the major trouble always upset tummy. Have a full day dealing with :insurance: people and making sure of these applied benefits medicaid or care not sure which. Just sitting here thinking aobut it for this day, makes me ready for another nap. Im guessing it will take time to get uesd to all of this as well as daily body changes and haow to access them. I have found that V8 juice stays down pretty well although im getting a clone of it a vegetablke juice drink in can. Iced its good. Perrier is my "soda pop" for now> Regular soda just dont tast no good no more and semd to make stomack iccky Shal i call that hospice place and see f they have any books on these issues?? Librarys dont have much in them here at least. Shoud I while i still feel reasonable start ditching stuff i need to get rid of anyway? So much to baffle the mind, at least for me. Should i try to now trade off all my clothes that are 4 sizes to big now? I know one thing $$$ will be tight here soon. NOW NOTE Im not cpomplaining per say I just dont know how to get a grasp on all of this. All you people whom have large familys and family living ought to be real thankful! And good close friends... Friends we have no doubt.. but its rough with no family support to speak of. Just dont know about all of this. Well maybe today can sit and watch the corn grow in field{ grin} that is "if" Im allowed to Well Thnk will try a small piece of canalope or a pear....... Makwa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gail Posted June 7, 2004 Share Posted June 7, 2004 Life with cancer I have found is like being on a roller coaster--highs and lows, ups and downs. Not a ride we choose to take, but we are all on it. When I was first diagnosed with breast cancer, I contacted my local American Cancer Society. I didn't know who else to talk to. And I know my cancer center has social workers and psychologists availab.e Maybe try talking to your oncologist, or one of the nurses? And we are here. gail Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angie Daughter of Bill Posted June 7, 2004 Share Posted June 7, 2004 I understand your ups and downs. My Dad and I both experience ups and downs. As for you having too many visitors and wanting some privacy, how about placing a note on your outside doors that states, "I am resting right now, please call later. We will arrange a visit." Sound a little rude? Well, no more so than people stopping by wanting your things!! Now that is rude. I'm sorry that you are having to deal with those people. The people who are trying to shy away from you may actually be trying to be respectful of you. Maybe they are trying to give you some time to adjust. You are right about the people who have large families. My Dad is the lung cancer patient. I am his only child. I do have a half sister, but my Dad is not her father, so no help there. My parents are divorced. No help there. My Dad has one brother who is so self absorbed that he never comes around. (unless he wants to go fishing in our pond) My Dad's mother is living, but bless her heart.........every time she comes around she loses control of her emotions. Dad doesn't need that. So, as you can see.......I pretty much handle this on my own. If not for the good folks here, I would have already pulled all of my hair out!!!! Praying for good days for you! Angie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snowflake Posted June 7, 2004 Share Posted June 7, 2004 Makwa, One of the first things I did when diagnosed was get a will drawn up. This is just a basic will, with who gets what financially. After that was all signed, sealed and registered, some of THAT pressure went away. We are currently trying to rid our small world of too much clutter...still have pared down all the "from two houses to one" stuff and will be having a helluva yard sale when we move into our new house. IF there are things that are "clutter", sure, get rid of them because clutter in a home can be stressful. IF the things in question still bring you joy, KEEP 'EM! Be a "selfish person" - it's YOUR crap! GEESH! (and you tell 'em I said so and they can take it up with ME instead of bugging you, okay?? I promise, they won't call again....heheheh). If there are things you want to give to certain people upon the "I won't be using it" side of what MAY happen, put their name on it - tape on a piece of paper with their name....write a will.... But don't get rid of things you love due to greedy people crawling up your rear - not acceptable. Matter of fact, I'm an ornery little thing. If I were dealing with that, I'd make sure it ALL went to the Salvation Army or my local church or a home for battered women...someplace that I felt it would be APPRECIATED, not EXPECTED... Take care, don't let the bastards wear ya down! Sleep when you need to sleep, eat what you can and keep on keeping on! Becky PS You have MY permission to be a bear and growl the intrusive folks away... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hebbie Posted June 7, 2004 Share Posted June 7, 2004 You are right, basic human nature can s*ck sometimes! After a cancer diagnoses, we seem to find out who really matters in our lives and who doesn't. I was surprised to find how many "true" friends I had -- my best friend made a point of coming to my house each week on "chemo night" and was waiting for me when I got home, with dinner made, and stuck around to watch Friends with me and get me settled into bed. I was also surprised beyond believe to find a few people I thought were real friends suddenly make up every excuse in the book to not visit and not call. The sad fact is that they couldn't handle it. It hurt very badly for a while, but then I realized it's not MY problem to deal with -- it is theirs. As for the ones staking a claim to your personal effects...well, that is just plain ignorant and fortunately I did not have that to contend with. You need to think about yourself right now -- if you are up for visitors, then visit your little head off....but if you want to be alone, don't hesitate to ask people to give you some time. They will understand. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeanCarl Posted June 7, 2004 Share Posted June 7, 2004 A lot of good things said already. Here's my thoujghts on the situation: Sounds to me like you've reached a point in your life where "One day at a time" ceases to be a cliche. I've found it's the ONLY way to handle all the stuff that needs doing and all the changes that went on in my life after my dx. And it's the only way I know of to stay flying when all the other ducks around me are hitting the ground. Decide what is important to do TODAY and forget about the rest until tomarrow (or whenever). Not everything is priority one and not everything HAS to get done today. I had the "bad tasting food" thing for awhile, though I never had the nausea part of it. IF it will stay down I found a milk shake made with Weight Gainer 2200 (can be found at places like Rite Aide and GNC) and my favorite ice cream and a little milk (if regular milk upsets your stomach try soy milk) did the trick. For awhile it was the ONLY thing that tasted good. As for the people infringing on your privacy. Be as rude as necessary. Start out polite and if that doesn't work up the scale until it gets through. If they get offended that's THEIR problem and you don't need people like that around anyway. Hopefuly you'll find a few that "get it" and THOSE folks wil be the ones who end up being the most help. Dean Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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