Oh Kim, don't believe for a second that your dad doesn't need you now that he has someoe in his life. I'm sure you know that's not the way he feels. I know how hard this must be for you and I think you are handling this very well. You know, most people feel so bad for women when they lose a husband. They think women are the weaker sex and that they need a man to lean on. From my experiences in life, I have found that thinking to be very wrong. I think women are very strong. They seem to take time to think out the path ahead of them. Like Lil said, men need to have someone with them. I'm sure this involvement with someone new doesn't mean your dad isn't still hurting. If he could make the choice, I'm sure he would choose to have your mother back. As for the headstone, I can understand and sympathize with your feelings. He should honor your wishes and take care of this responsibility, as it means so much to you. I think you're doing a great job of dealing with all of these changes. HAng in there and remember how much your dad loves and needs you!