Ann

I always thought.....that the happiest times in our life would be when we had grandchildren. I would always visualize Dennis taking little boys fishing on Saturday mornings. Oh, how happy he would have been.

I loved all the responses that Katie received from her series of "injection" questions. It truly gave us a chance to know each other a little better. This one is for all that have loved and lost someone special. I think of this almost daily when thinking about Dennis and what I had expected out of life. I always thought........

Please see Bunny's post in the LC in the News forum. Finally, someone seems to have done their research on LC before reporting a story. For once, I didn't get angry while reading an article about LC.

Dean and Gay... Not a day goes by that I don't think of the two of you and wonder how things are going. I'm so glad Dean's daughter is coming for a visit. I know that will really raise his spirits. Glad to hear Hospice is coming in to give you a hand, gay. Make sure and take all the help you can get. This will give you some rest time. We miss both of you and are sending lots of hugs and prayers for you!

Elaine, I have missed you so much! I am sorry to hear about your daughter and I know how very worried you must be. I'm saying prayers that everything goes well for both of you. Take care of yourself through all of this and please keep us posted.

You know, the thing that really bothers me is my inability to help my MIL right now. I saw her at the hospital the other night when I was visiting the aunt. She looks so very tired and so very old. I was always amazed at the great job she did of always looking so young. Dennis was always such a great son and was always there for his parents. I have lived with this feeling of rejection, never knowing what I had done.

I can certainly understand why you are feeling a little down right now. This board has suffered the loss of so many wonderful people lately. Just remember you can always vent here. There are so many good listeners! As for your family....good luck! It seems that so many of us have family problems when the going gets tough!

I can understand both sides of this issue. Like Dave, Dennis was a smoker and I do tell people that he smoked. But...he was also a plumber and had been exposed to asbestos for years when he was a plumber in New York. The doctor was never definitive that the smoking caused the cancer but in his case, I'm sure it was. My standard reply is....yes he did but there are many people that have lung cancer that have never smoked. As for quick replies....I can't top the reply Diane gave, so why even bother!!!!

Finding out the cancer was not in your mom's vocal chords was indeed pricless. Don't you just hate it when people make such a big fuss over something as small as $38.00. This so reminds me of an episode I had at the gym last week. I had bought a wonderful cookbook for $8.00 that was written by the gym's dietician. The book is filled with healthy low fat recipes. My soon to be DIL loved the book so I bought her one. I must have looked like a pauper because when I told the lady at the counter I wanted to buy a cookbook she said..."You know they're $8.00." This ticked me off a little and I said..."Yes, I Know. This is the second one I am buying." Then she said..."Why would you want two?" It wasn't just what she said but also the terrible tone of her voice. Personally, I think it was just too much bother for her to deal with!!! But...I am so happy to hear your good news about your mom. Just sorry to hear there are so many nasty people in this world. They should all be nice and grateful that they aren't in your mom's shoes and dealing with this monster disease!!!

I really feel guilty about this post, as there are so many members that have such recent losses but I am hoping just "talking" will make things easier to accept. When Dennis was diagnosed with LC, his oncologist explained the necessity of a biopsy to determine the type of cancer. Dennis has a cousin that had breast cancer. She is a registered nurse and happens to be very opinionated. She immediately told my FIL that Dennis should not have a biopsy as that would cause the cancer to spread faster. Dennis listened to his oncologist and wanted to have the biopsy. My FIL even came to my work, telling me that I had to change Dennis' mind about the biopsy. He finally started crying and said "you don't know how it feels to lose a son." He then proceeded to call my sons and tell them that their mother made him cry. Dennis had the biopsy and the relationship got back to normal during his illness. After Dennis died, his family acted as if I was non existant. No calls, no visits....nothing. After 26 years of being part of a family, I had been aired out to dry. They weren't happy about the fact Dennis had been cremated, per his wishes and also blamed me for this. For almost three years now, there has been practically no contact between us. Then, last Thursday evening, a 91 year old aunt of Dennis's called to see if I could come and help her, as she was sick and alone. I went, without hesitation. I stayed with her until she was finally admitted to the hospital on Saturday. During hospital visits, I have seen extended family members that are now telling me that my FIL has told everyone that I wouldn't let him in my house to visit his dying son. NOT TRUE!!! My FIL now has pancreatic cancer and my MIL is now a 24 hour caretaker. I had been doing well with this but since being around the family again, all the pain is returning. Am I wrong for feeling like a victim here? I feel as if I have been tried, convicted and executed without a jury.

Ginny, I always have the same question asked of me when I tell people about Dennis. Someone has to get the message out that this disease is not just about smoking!!!

I agree that this was a terrible article. I had to laugh at the symptoms they listed. I'm sure some of these apply to some people but my husband was in an advanced stage at diagnosis and exhibited NONE of these symptoms. Where do these people get off using personal opinion rather than cold hard facts regarding the smoking issue???

Thanks Amy!!! That's the site I was referring to in my post!

Don't feel bad, Donna. I haven't worked all those hours and I only received a "respectable score" of 7. This was fun. Thanks for sharing.

Great idea!!! It was so nice of you to think of both Dana and LCSC.

Rich...glad to see you are keeping that great sense of humor!!! Yes, I think by all means that dinner and a movie is definitely not too much to ask, considering the payoff!!!! Glad to hear that the doc says everything is OK. But...I'm also glad that you're opting for testing earlier than scheduled!!!

I am so sorry that your mother isn't doing well. I will keep her in my prayers. As others have stated, death comes very differently for each person. I have lost a husband and a close friend to lung cancer and both death experiences were very different. I am glad that you are seeking the help of Hospice. You will find them to be a very helpful and caring organization. They have so much information to offer you that will prove to be very helpful. I know your mom isn't home yet, so you don't have the information. You might try a Hospice website to get some information in the meantime. I know that someone from this board had once posted a site that had a lot of information about death and dying issues. Maybe someone will be kind enough to repost the address.

Leslie....I know my response may be a bit different from what you expected but here goes. When Dennis was diagnosed with sclc, I immediately combed every internet site possible that dealt with lung cancer. I had statistics pouring from my head and, considering the type of cancer Dennis had, none of them were good. I think I kept searching, hoping to find just one positive report that would have positive statistics. Well, thank goodness I finally found the board that this one branched from. The members convinced me to throw all those statistics right out the window. I did and from that day on, I never allowed myself to think of Dennis as one of those statistics.

Very good one, Frank!!!

Don and Lucie are such great people!!! A few nights ago, I was thinking of Dennis and I used the phrase outloud....."I always thought....." Well, one thing that "I always thought" was that Dennis and I would be together for many years. If Dennis had lived, I think we would have always been in love ....like Don and Lucie.

Becky...I'm saying prayers that things are going well for you.

Go ahead and scream! Unless you've actually done it, you need to try it. Screaming out loud can help to release a lot of tension and frustration. I used to roll the windows up tight on the car and scream when I was driving on a quiet stretch of road! After screaming, I would definitely ask this wonderful doctor of yours for a referral for a new physician. I'm sure he will give you great advice. I know how "abandoned" this must make you feel, since you obviously have trust in this doctor! Hope you find someone equally as wonderful!

Lisa...you are such a great representative for our cause!!! I am so proud of you and everything you are doing to help everyone that has been touched by this terrible disease!!! p.s. Can I have your autograph??? (Big Smile)

Wow...we almost have twins on our board. Our sweet Shirley had a birthday yesterday and now I learn that Connie is celebrating her birthday today!!! Happy Birthday to both you wonderful gals!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY OUR DEAR CONNIE....... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU ..... AND MANY MORE!!!!!!