Ann

Brandy, I am so sorry to hear this news. Please know that I am keeping you and your Daddy in my thoughts and prayers. Please let us know how he is doing.

Leslie...thanks so much for posting these poems. I have read them several times already!

Wendy, it's been over two years since I lost Dennis and I can honestly say that I don't know if it gets better or if you just learn to live with it. There are days that it is easier to deal with and then there are days when the pain is as fresh as the day I lost him. I suppose the best way to sum it all up is to say that your mind and body learn to merely "cope" with the situation. As humans, we are survivors. I can say that many of the past 2-1/2 years have been just that for me....survival. I am all too familar with the "crushing" pain that you describe. That pain hit me the first time it hit me that I would never see Dennis again in this life. When that thought first hits your mind it is truly overwhelming. I finally had to sell Dennis's truck because when I would approach the driveway, I would automatically think..."he's home." I can tell you that the pain will diminish and life will get easier. Thee is no timeline on when this will happen. You'll just wake up one day and for some reason, things will be easier. One thing that really helped me was a little self-designed exercise. I went back to a time in my life, before I was a wife, before I was a mother, and tried to remember who I was and what I liked to do. You know, it was really difficult to remember who I was before I became so many things for other people. Once I figured out who I was...and now am...I tried to do some of the things I liked to do. Maybe this would help you. Please PM me anytime you feel like talking!!!

Hi Dean Carl & Gay ! Gay, thank you so very much for posting and letting us know how things are going! Congratulations on that 21st anniversary! The years really fly when you're spending them with someone you love! I pray that Dean will continue to have good days!!!

I'm saying prayers right now, asking God to give you relief from this terrible pain!!! Hope things are much better today!

Peggy, I am so very happy for each and every one of your WAHOOS!!!! I'm also praying that the WAHOOS continue...for a very, very long time!!!!

Martanne...so glad to hear the chemo is over!!! That is really good news. As for the shingles...stress can cause that also. After my gallbladder surgery (which was no picnic) I developed shingles. Although the doctor caught it very early, I still had some very painful days. I really hope Joel recovers from the shingles very quickly. I understand there are some new drugs out there that really kick shingles in the butt. When I was a child, I remember hearing of older folks that had shingles and then there was nothing to do for them. Wow...can't even imagine how painful that must have been.

Kathi, I am so very sorry to read of your loss. I'm sure Pops is watching over you from heaven with a big smile on his face!

Cheryl, I'm glad you're making the step to contact the doctor. Sometimes, caregivers have to make these decisions and make these calls. I know, in my case, I had to call the doctor aside quite often when Dennis went for office visits. To hear Dennis's version of things, there was never any problem and everything was always just fine, regardless of what was really happening. That was the determination in him...determination to beat this monster. By admitting it was getting the best of him would have been a statement of defeat on his part. I hope this is all just a false alarm and everything is fine.

Laura, I'm so very sorry for your loss. Please accept my sympathy and prayers.

DITTO - DITTO.....and then some!!! Love ya Katie !

Melanie, I am so sorry to read of your gransmother's diagnosis. I can tell from your post that she is a truly amazing lady. I think your choice in selecting the quilt is a great one. Quilts are such wonderful heirlooms and there is nothing quite as comforting as a family quilt. I have several quilts that my dear grandmother made and when I'm having a really bad day, I just wrap myself up in one of her quilts and it's almost like being wrapped up in her arms. I'm praying for both of you!!!

Being a caregiver is probably the toughest "job" I have ever had! I put job in quotes, as it wasn't really a "job" but instead a true labor of love. Yes, by all means listen to Don's advice. He's our resident expert here when it comes to advice for caregivers. From my experience, I found it was absolutely a must to have someone to talk to and a shoulder to cry on. Like others have said, I tried to be tough and not cry until I was away from Dennis. I found it's very important to cry, talk, scream, yell...whatever you have to do in your own space and time to relieve some of the feelings of pain and frustration that are all hidden inside you. I will be thinking of you!!!

This is very good news!!! I'll continue keeping you and your mom in my prayers!!!!

Nancy, thanks for posting this link. What a nice, well written detail of Mike's life. I believe the picture is from the wedding...correct? His face and smile reflect love and pride for his family on that day. I've been thinking of you and saying prayers for you.

Denise, my prayers have been said for your dad and aunt.

Hello there stranger! It was so very good to see your post! How have you been doing???? I miss hearing from you!

Happy Anniversary Don and Lucie!!! Cheers...and more cheers. Congrats for 46 wonderful years of love! Hope you had a wonderful dinner!!!!

Sounds like great news to me!!!

Leslie, thanks so much for sharing this. I definitely think this is something I need to post in big letters where I can read it often!!!!

Melanie...it is so very good to hear from you ! I just think it is wonderful that you are working on the foundation and keeping yourself busy. I also think it is terrible that the "system" can just fire people because they are sick and have been out of work for too long. Have you contacted social security regarding disability? I understand that they will often run a case right through in a case like yours. It's just amazing how you are doing so much to spread the word about cancer and thinking so much of others!!! God bless!!!

Minnie, I am so sorry for your loss. I will be keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.

Addie...I hope your peanut brittle is "just what the doctor ordered" ...LOL! You are just too cute!!!

There are a lot of people here that really do care and are ready to listen. Most of us can give advice or suggestions based on our own experiences. Read Katie's message and understand that sometimes it takes a little while for us to respond. I am so sorry you are having trouble sleeping. Right now, I'm sure that you have thousands of questions and "what-if's" running around in your head, mush ,like a hamster on a wheel. That in itself would make it almost impossible to sleep. I know that it's often a really scary thing to know the truth, but maybe you should confront your dad and let hime know that you need to know what he's up against so that you will be better prepared to help him. This will help answer some questions and possibly ease some fears. I'm thinking of you!!!

Sounds like a great plan to me. I've certainly done my share of picking up pieces and taping them back together!