Ann

The Wife and I went out for a meal at a Chinese restaurant and order the "Chicken Surprise." The waiter brings us the meal, served in a lidded cast iron pot. Just as the wife is about to serve herself, the lid of the pot rises slightly and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the lid slams back down "Good grief, did you see that?" she asks Me. I hadn't, so she asks Me to look in the pot. As I reached for it again the lid rises, and I see two little eyes looking around before it slams down. Rather perturbed, I call the waiter over, explain what is happening, and demand an explanation. "Please sir," says the waiter, "what you order?" I replied, "Chicken Surprise." (You're going to love this....................) . . . . . . . . . . Ah... so sorry," says the waiter, "I bring you Peeking Duck"

A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem was. The man replied, "I have a flat tire." The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?" The man responded, "When you break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back. Hey, it don't make sense to me neither."

Three old mischievous Grandmas were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home. About then an old Grandpa walked by, and one of the old Grandma's yelled out saying, "We bet we can tell exactly how old you are." The old man said, "There ain't no way you can guess it, you old fools." One of the old Grandmas said, "Sure we can! Just drop your pants and under shorts and we can tell your exact age." Embarrassed just a little, but anxious to prove they couldn't do it, he dropped his drawers. The Grandmas asked him to first turn around a couple of times and to jump up and down several times. Then they all piped up and said, "You're 87 years old!" Standing with his pants down around his ankles, the old gent asked, "How in the world did you guess?" Slapping their knees and grinning from ear to ear, all three old ladies happily yelled in unison-- "We were at your birthday party yesterday!"

I can't believe I even asked this question...lol! I have to be the absolute worst about drinking enough water. 6-8 glasses a day...no way! I really feel as if I need to give myself a pat on the back if I get down two bottles of water a day. I drink other things that have water in them... like tea...but I just have trouble with plain water. My mom used to be the same way, so I think this is a mental thing. Yes...I know how important this is for my health and I really do try...sometimes!!!

How many glasses of water do you drink each day?

This little guy is sitting at the bar just staring at his drink. He's been sitting there for half an hour when this big trouble-making BIKER steps up next to him, grabs his drink and gulps it down in one swig.The poor little guy starts crying. "Come on man, I was just giving you a hard time," says the biker. "I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man crying.""This is the worst day of my life," says the little guy between sobs."I can't do anything right. I overslept and was late to an important meeting,so my boss fired me. When I went to the parking lot, I found my car was stolen and I have no insurance. I grabbed a cab home but, after the cab left, I discovered I had forgotten my wallet in it. At home I found my wife in bed with the gardener. So I came to this bar and was thinking about putting an end to my life, and you show up and drink the poison."

I am so very sorry that your family has suffered so many losses. I still have trouble understanding why God often challenges one family with so many trials.

I'm an O negative. Luckily all three of my sons are also O negative, so I never had any problems.

What is your blood type?

So very sorry for your loss.

Would you ever lie to someone to make them feel good about themselves?

So very sorry.

Oh yes....Deal or No Deal and Dancing With The Stars. I did watch American Idol last season and think I will again. I really liked Jordan last season and I think wanting her to win is what made me keep on watching. Like others, I love Two and A Half Men. I find my self laughing out loud at that show. And, as a huge Kelsey Grammar fan, I'm looking forward to Back to You.

Good one, Ginny. So appropriate for all that's been going on in my office this past week.

Yes, I always set my alarm clock. Although I'm pretty good about always waking up at the same time (even on weekends when I can sleep), I never trust it without that clock!

When working (or worked if you're retired), did you set your alarm clock every night or do you wake up on time on your own?

What new television shows are you looking forward to seeing when the new season begins in a couple of weeks?

Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very attractive blonde woman from Alabama arrived ...and bet twenty-thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice. She said, 'I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I play topless.' With that, she stripped to the waist; rolled the dice; and yelled, 'Come on, baby.... Southern Girl needs new clothes!' As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up-and-down... and squealed...'YES! YES! I WON! I WON!' She hugged each of the dealers... and then picked up her winnings and her clothes, and quickly departed. The dealers stared at each other dumfounded. Finally, one of them asked, 'What did she roll?' The other answered, 'I don't know... I thought you were watching.' Moral --- Not all Southerners are stupid. Not all blondes are dumb. But, all men..... are men.

I was still a manager for Target in 2001. On the morning of September 11, I had to be at the work very early in the morning but Dennis was still at home, planning his work day, when the plane hit the first building. He called me at work every few minutes and kept me updated. Target corporate headquarters phoned us and told us to make sure we did not discuss this, for fear customers in the store might panic. I remember being so very afraid, as reports were coming in that all major cities and some bases were also under attack. Dennis came to Target and gave me a reassuring hug, trying to make me believe we were safe and everything would be alright. When I got home that afternoon, I just remember the feeling of fear and wanting to have all my children home that night. My oldest son and DIL were in Nashville and my youngest son was working in Orlando. I was literally afraid to go to sleep. Dennis sat up all night, glued in front of the television, and promised that he would keep me safe. Today, I think of that day and know, that although I was filled with fear....I felt safe with my husband watching over me while I slept.

What do you think of first when you hear 9-11-01 ? What were you doing when you heard about the attack? How did you hear? What was the first thought that entered your mind?

I "skim" the newspaper every day and pick out the articles I am interested in to read. During the week, I read the local section first. On Sunday, I start with the sale inserts and the coupons....LOL.

I love George Carlin.... and...... I love you for posting this , Ginny-Girl!!! I needed a good laugh today!

I'm grateful that the 20 week sonogram shows that I have another healthy grandbaby on the way...due in January!

Good one, larry. It made me feel so nice to be younger than quite a few people, as I usually feel older than God on Mondays!!!

I love this, Commie...LOL