Thank you all so much for the quick responses. I feel such a variety of emotions...of course fear, but also guilt for various reasons. One, because if, in fact, I do have it, I've brought it on myself. Two, for not going to the doctor sooner. I feel like I'm letting my children down by not being more aggressive, but I'm paralyzed by fear.
I had a few episodes of hemoptysis when I was pregnant with my daughter, Lily. I did tell my OB about it, but he said "oh I do the same thing....it's sinuses". No x-ray was ordered..nothing. I was concerned then, but it went away and I hadn't had a problem with it again up until a couple months ago. Maybe that was my warning sign, and I didnt' heed it. That was well over a year ago...so now, I'm worried more than ever.
Sorry to ramble....just sorta getting all my thoughts out that I've kept to myself for too long. Thanks again for the support!
Missy