bacalice

Di: Trying to hold on. Too weak to really write alice

di i am tooweak too write but doing my best to hang on: alice

Di: I feel better but I still can't write well. I read my sentence and I don't know what I wrote. I am still very tired but I have a caregiver of many tricks so she is my efficient secretary I am feeling a little better weak but my mind is not as weak as I though it would be. Stop all treatment he is afraid to give me more I see again on Jan 24, and I will get a CT scan I stoped Chemo on Nov 03, because CPT11 may me to sick had no more Chemo until they decided to typ PCI. Had 13 PCI . I am have done and cooperated with everthing they said and I am in the Master Hands Thanks for your help and comfort. DX'D SCLC LIMITED May '06, 2003 Chemo ectopside 28 treatment 28 Rad 9 3CPT11 and nothing till I received PCI 13 Struggling still Thanks to all of you

Radioligist ceased the zaps. I didn't. he got chickened and stopped with 14 because I was so weak, i have 24 hour care and no longer try to to do any thing except use the potty. i am so tired. i am trying to find more strength to go on. with gratitude, di and all others who have helped me alice dx'd limited sclc MAY 06. 03 pci 12 /06/2004/12/12/04

di: thanks so much and I am trying to hang on and defog my brain. seem to be getting a bit stronger and I am trying to get my sentences to be clearing but it is not easy to get them to make sense. My doctpr stopped the treatment and I am going to try to balance my checkbooks. Chilcren are concerned because not matter my illness, I always could count my mney. Later.

di went for treatment, rad onc said no more, i was too weak.i told him i wantet to finish but he was excited but it i died becaus3 of it, i wasgoing to haunt him.so i finished i willbe gladto write if my mibd gets better love to alland thcnks to all

DI: very cold in Illinois. I didn't go in today. I go bacvk to the facility on Mon. and tues for two more treatments. aaaai have been very weeak and ill. have falend a lot and ii am unstablr om my feet. dr has reduced decadron and say that i am being weand and should be weaned soon and then i will feel better. thank di and i will rtie when i can be more lucid alice

Di: Inexplicably tired. i saw the Rad ONC and he gaves me doses to reduce the steroids so I can come down off the steroids and then perhaps I will not be so tired. I now have until Dec.28 and hopefully it will be over and it hope that treatment will be successful. I still have not lost hsir but i am very tired and shaky. thanks for your encouragement. will check in when i can. dx'd May 06/03

bett: i am so tired but i must speak a word. i have been up and down and i still feel as if i am riding a roller coaster. we each handle the disease as best we can but i try to live as you say, i thank GOD for every dawn. prayers and hugs and as long as there is breath, there is hope for another battle. we may not win the war but a serious of winning small battles adds up to a longer life. Hugs and prayers.

Di: couldn't wait to get home to see what happened but i am having trouble thi king and focusing. fortunately i have an excellent caregiver. she was found before i started pci. i now have a ridiculus amount of meds and for the first time, i can't do it myself well. there was some hestitancy on the part of the onc to give me pc because i have so many aliments that i have collected over the years to the point that i was failing in ability to be mobile and stable on my feet before thecancer struck. then finally a year later they decided to do it. hair is still here but i am prone to nausea and sleepy and tired but i am at peace with round the clock care that i receive and for some reason, it is one day at the time and i hope the pci helps but i am so glad i tried. i see the lights , i smell a strange order but it is over in about 5 minutes. this includes fitting the mask and i was told that placement was of utmost importance since they needed the zaps in the same place. My onc smiled brightly yesterday at my visit. mucus and coughing have decreased but i now have some kind of belching sensation but all in all i am more calm and whatever the end result, i tried and your comments and addie' amomg others have made the path easier. Marge, at 70 , helped too. You are almost through, bully for you. i will miss coming home to find out how your treatment went but i will be glad that you are through. You certainly have helped me through. May GOD BLESS. and thanks to all who posted about PCI. Headed for lunch and bed, i am hungry and tired

sorry di, brain is not working well but i am trying. that is why there are two similar messages. I did it over because I didn't think that it got posted.

Di: It is not surprising that you are doing so well, you have such a nice attitude and a supportive mother with good genes. I have an appointment for 8:45 and am usually out by 9:00. Lately I find somewhere to go before I get back home but that is because I so seldom get out. It is cold here and I must wear a mask but sun is shining and I am feeling better so it is a very good day. Nausea is better but I forgot to take the decradon this morning and the doctor said that I should not miss a dose because he was doubtful but hopeful that I could complete the series of 15 treatments. I know that you have fewer than I. I have learned that the facility will be closed Fri.-Sun next week so treatment for me will skip three days and end on the 28th . I just pray that this has been effective. I am just grateful that you have helped me through. My techs now ask about you and Addie every morning. Today they asked where you were from but I told her I didn't know. My focus was on how your treatment went today. Have a great day! Hugs and prayers for all of us. Dx'd Limited SCLC May 06,2003 PCI scheduled to begin 12/07.2004

Di: It is not surprising that you are doing so well, you have such a nice attitude and a supportive mother with good genes. I have an appointment for 8:45 and am usually out by 9:00. Lately I find somewhere to go before I get back home but that is because I so seldom get out. It is cold here and I must wear a mask but sun is shining and I am feeling better so it is a very good day. Nausea is better but I forgot to take the decradon this morning and the doctor said that I should not miss a dose because he was doubtful but hopeful that I could complete the series of 15 treatments. I know that you have fewer than I. I have learned that the facility will be closed Fri.-Sun next week so treatment for me will skip three days and end on the 28th . I just pray that this has been effective. I am just grateful that you have helped me through. My techs now ask about you and Addie every morning. Today they asked where you were from but I told her I didn't know. My focus was on how your treatment went today. Have a great day! Hugs and prayers for all of us. Dx'd Limited SCLC May 06,2003 PCI scheduled to begin 12/07.2004

Hi Di: Enjoyed your message. You and Addie write so well. makes for interesting reading. I am so sleepy and fatigued and making many mistakes with writing and it is slow go. My head didn't hurt much today. My hands are not steady but I am like schmaydee, giving it a good try. I am not ready to give up. I never checked out what happens when this is over. My focus was just trying to get through this PCI step. I will write more when I feel better. I am so eager to read what you write that i feel i should say something. It is really cold here and I have to wear a mask and oxygen to try to make breathing easier. Your mother is some kind of lady. You must come from very good stock. Take care and thanks for your writing.

Addie: Thanks for your welcome. I felt like the 82 year old but I decided to fight and try the treatment after the encouragement of my oncologist. You of course are right that this disease does not respect age or anything and I guess you just do the best that you can. You seem to be doing very well in helping calm other people. Di said that you helped her and she helped me and I am trying to help Marge some. I am not very good with the computer and just was forced to write when I read Di's log. Well, we are all in this together and we revel in each success because it inspires each of us. Joanie: You are blessed to be a two and a half year survivor. It gives me much hope. I have so many ailments that I feeel they are having a race to beat cancer to the finish line. I have learned to try to make the best of each day and focus on this day and not worry about tomorrow so much that i don't enjoy the present. I fight each battle one at the time as best I can. dx'd May 06. 2003 sclc limited 28 rads, concurrent with 4 cycles of Chemo PCI scheduled Dec. 6 through Dec. 27.