I have mentioned taking notes to her, she doesn't do it. It is frustrating and to be honest, I feel like she isn't telling me the truth about what is going on sometimes. There is nothing anyone can do to change how she is about things like this. I know her. I think part of it is she is embarrassed about the smoking and everything and what it has done to her because so many people have been telling her for so long that she needed to take better care of herself. I am trying my best to be positive , but I would feel so much better to talk to her doctors and hear from them, good or bad, what is really happening. I have told her this and she just says she needs her privacy. I am trying not to be selfish and make her angry and upset just to make me feel better. At some point, she is going to have to tell us what is happening if things do not get better. She has all the support she needs from me as she knows I'm there for whatever she needs, but she only tells me what is going on so I am very much alone trying to process all this. My fiance knows because there was no way i could even get up in the morning and function without his support. This site is starting to help though and thank you all and know that i pray everyday for a cure for everyone who is going through this.