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melindasue37

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Posts posted by melindasue37


  1. Thank you all for the warm welcome...and big hugs to Kasey and Val. Wow, you both are still here? That's wonderful.

    Steph, yea, he had a biopsy and then PET to get a more clear picture.

    We don't know much at this point, only that there is nymph node involvement but have no idea to what extent.

    First appointment is Tuesday morning with the oncologist.

    Still praying for some type of good news.

    Kasey, you are just too kind. Thank you, I'll have to look for a picture.

    I was just thinking how nice is have to have a place to come where people understand what you're going through.

    Melinda


  2. Hello everyone,

    I wasn't certain where to post this considering I was "new" to the site when I was here back in 2004-06 during my Moms lung cancer journey. I was so scared and confused at that time, searching for knowledge and asking for advice.

    It's been five years and we are embarking on the journey again. This time, it's my Dad. Well, stepdad, but my Mom and him were married when I was 13. He's been around through thick and thin and without his guidance through all the years, I'm not sure where I would be.

    We just found out he has lung cancer. Not sure yet which kind or stage. He had a PET on Friday and we are waiting sooo patiently for Tuesday when we get the results.

    So, here I am again......hoping, searching and praying.

    Melinda


  3. A girl I work with told me about the special right before I left work last night. When I got home I caught the last 5 minutes. I wish so much I could have watched the show. He is an incredible man.

    Thank you for posting this Ann.

    I plan on buying the book this weekend.


  4. Thank you all so much for your words of encouragement, support and understanding.

    You're all awesome....I really mean that.

    Thank you for taking the time to respond and for reminding me that I'm very lucky to have somewhere to get out those feelings on those rocky days.

    Warm Hugs,

    Melinda


  5. I've been wanting to post here for so long and the words in my mind just don't get typed out as easily as I would hope them to. But, here goes...

    It has been a little over a year and a half since losing my Mom and she's been on my mind in a different way for the last few weeks. I still yearn to call her on the phone for the assurance of unconditional love and that feeling that I was never alone in the world. My family and I are close and I have friends that I could confide in but it just isn't the same.

    I've been feeling that the time since her death until now is widening at a pace that I just can't put my mind around. It feels like its been forever since hearing her voice. So long since being able to end a phone call with, "I love you, Mom." I miss her and I just want her back for a little time to tell her how much I took her for granted. To update her on the kids and to tell her I finally understand how difficult it must have been for her to raise all of us "wild" kids. I want to call her talk about what I was making (or better yet burning) for dinner, I want to call her to complain about all the craziness that my x-husband has been putting me through. I know what she would say and she would end up throwing out a few cuss words and get so wound up that I would end up laughing and smiling knowing that she did understand and would always be on "my" side.

    Some days you just get thrown back into the grief process and I find myself so quick to judge, so impatient, so cheated and so jealous of those that still have their Moms.

    And I wanted to thank all of you for posting how you are getting through the grief. You'll never begin to understand how much so many of the posts have helped me through the difficult days.

    So, thanks for letting me get it out. I think I feel better already :D

    Warm Hugs,

    Melinda


  6. Teri,

    Wow, I got goosebumps reading your post.

    I do believe that Bill sent you a message in such an obvious way that you couldn't shrug it off to only irony. He couldn't have been more blatant...how awesome is that?!!!

    I think of you often and enjoy reading your posts of your continued love for your husband.

    I hope you find some comfort on your special day...Bill is watching over you and missing you, obviously, as much as you miss him. Some of us only dream of that kind of special love....

    Happy Anniversary to you both.

    Melinda

  7. John


    I was checking in for updates and my stomach dropped when I read your words. I am so sorry, Ry.

    Saying a special prayer for you and your children....and just again, so very, very sorry for your devastating sudden loss.

    Melinda


  8. if you're a wackadoo I am too cause I know there is no doubt that it was your Mom. How cool!!!

    Don't try to second guess yourself, Nick, just enjoy the moments when our Moms are trying to let us know they are still "here."

    Just out of curiosity, have you had any dreams of her?

    Melinda


  9. Katie, Nick and Kasey,

    I felt guilty about posting here today because I haven't been around at all lately to support anyone. I'm sorry for that.

    But I had to post here because all of you traveled the journey with my Mom and I and it was always where I came with good news (boy, I remember the post when she went into remission) all the questions we had during her treatments, and all the other "stuff" that I just needed to share.

    Thank you for making me smile today to see that through it all you guys are still here. You are all so caring.

    Kasey, the poem was absolutely perfect. I sent it to my brothers and sisters and have printed it out. Thank YOU!!


  10. So many mixed feelings today...I can't beleive it has been a year without Mom. Yet in so many ways it feels like forever.

    I thought I was doing so good in the "grief process" but today has put me right in the midst of it again and I can't seem to shake it.

    Last year my Mom passed away around 1:30 am. I woke up last night, looked at the clock and it was exactly 1:30.

    How strange that even while sleeping my mind was reminding me what today was....

    I want to be strong, remember all the GOOD memories and I'm really trying but darn it...it's hard. I just miss her so much.

    So, I'm going to finish up what work I have and get out of work where I can cry and scream and do whatever I have to do to get me through this day and remind myself that tomorrow WILl be better.

    Thanks for listening. This is the only place where I can do this and know that everyone (especially in the grieving forum) really gets it.

    Melinda


  11. Val,

    I read this quote from someone here on the board and copied it to a piece of paper on my desk.

    "Each time we embrace a memory, we meet once again with those we love~for the heart never forgets.

    May your day be filled with many special memories that bring a smile to your face....and may you feel your Moms presence with you on what I'm sure is a very emotional day for you.

    Thinking of you,

    Melinda


  12. Teri,

    I haven't been to the board in quite some time and was checking in to see how everyone was doing. I'm just so shocked to see this news....and so very sorry.

    Bill has touched so many of us here with his way with words.

    My thoughts and prayers are for you and your family.

    Melinda


  13. Happy Birthday, Kelly.

    I know this is a very difficult day for you.

    (My birthday was the first, first too.)

    I hope you find yourself smiling at least a few times today and even more I hope you can feel your Moms presence with you on your special day.

    Warm Hugs,

    Melinda

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