It seems like we live in constant fear that the next time we see the Oncologist or the Surgeon they are going to give us the bad news. But then what do we do? We don't seem to react the same as we did the first time. We have already gone through some of the worst times in our lives so what is left? I work myself up before every visit and normally I get the NED sign. But this time was different and I really didn't get upset, or scared or really feel any emotion. I talked calmly to the ONC and we discussed what needed to be done now and I went on my way to get it all set up. Not that I have the cancer back just that I am in a limbo status until I get the results back from the scans. Every time I get a pain around my chest, or I get a headache I wonder is it coming back? I guess I am just fumbling with the fact that a nodule was found and I am worried.
Ralph