Wayne Eric Chew

To say I was shocked just over a month ago to read the radiologist report "1.5 cm spiculated nodule Right medial upper lobe" is an understatement. Here is how everything transpired: I was having severe nausea and abdominal swelling for the past few months beginning at the end of last year. So my primary doc ordered an abdominal ultrasound. From that test I diagnosed with an infrarenal abdominal aortic aneurysm two months ago. I was then referred to a vascular surgeon to evaluate the aneurysm and explain at what size surgery would be needed. To get another look before my appointment with the vascular surgeon my primary care doctor and I decided to order an abdominal CT scan to see if the aneurysm had grown any. As I thought more about the CT scan something told me to call my primary and have him to also order a Chest CT scan since I was feeling out of breath and had developed a chronic cough. I also wanted my entire aorta visualized. Thank God I have that kind of rapport with my doctors since I had worked 20 years in surgery as a technologist and first assistant. They usually listen to me. So the scans were ordered and I went to have them done two weeks ago. That's when I got the shock of my life with the finding that I also had that suspicious looking nodule in my right upper lung. My aneurysm, which is small still, now was the furthest thing from my mind. Now I had to make an appointment with a pulmonologist. As I sat there with this young, highly reputable pulmonary doc hope found its renewal when my pulmonologist wanted to know if I had a screening CT done in the recent past? I told her yes I had a low dose screening chest CT scan last October and it came back clean. She expressed some confidence that the nodule could be a benign inflammatory nodule because if it was a malignancy they would have seen something on the screening chest CT done 6 months ago. My pulmonologist, just to be vigilant, got a copy of the screening chest CT to confirm her confidence that we might not be dealing with lung cancer. Well, apparently the radiologist missed it because she seen the nodule which back in October was approximately 7-8 mm. Since it has doubled in size to 1.5 cm and has a starburst appearance it is most likely malignant. I felt anger and also a ton of shame. I've been a smoker for decades beginning this nasty habit during Army boot camp. I don't drink alcohol. I eat the very healthiest of foods. Lots of fish and vegetables. No fast food ever. No fried foods ever. Smoking is my one terrible vice. I wish I never had touched a nicotine stick. The thing is it feels no one in my family wants to talk about "lung cancer." My wife seems very stressed as well as my adult children. Everyone is avoiding any conversations about it that lasts more than a minute. I have my PET scan next Friday to see if it is in my lymphatic system or met anywhere else. My mind is swimming, consumed with concern day and night. My eldest sister died in January from liver failure. My youngest sister died at 50 from systemic lupus in 2018. Our 22 year old son died in 2015 in a motor vehicle accident. My Mom died 10 months later from kidney disease. My 25 year nephew had a tough 3 year battle with brain cancer which he is in total remission. Now this. I think that the thought of another loved being very sick or even dying has left my family she'll shocked. Still, I need them. I need them to listen to my fears. I need to figure out how to talk about it. Hopefully the PET scan will confirm it is Stage 1. Then surgery should be able to get it all out with a wedge resection or lobectomy. Can someone give me advice how to talk about this? Can someone else tell me about their early stage lung cancer? Thank you.