hollyanne
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Posts posted by hollyanne
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Stephanie -
I have not posted for quite sometime. Yet, I saw your posting and my heart broke. Your feelings, your horrible grief, your panic - is all too familiar. When I was where you are now, I thought I would never make it - it hurt to breath. Yet, I have made it - it has been two years for me. I miss my mom every day, but I have made it. Oh Stephanie, you will too. Your mom is so proud of you and she will look over you.
You will be in my prayers tonight as you go through what will be the hardest time of your life. May God ease your pain and offer you moments of peace.
Holly
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Don -
I so agree with you -- it is a choice. My mom and Lucie made it "easier" for us with their tremendous faith. I don't worry about my mom, I just miss her. I know that she would be furious with me if she thought my life was standing still.
I watch my dad, they were married 47 years -- he has stayed very busy, has discovered a faith he never had (a great gift) and gets through every day. He mad the choice to go on as he says, "I promised your mom, we would make it..and go on."
I don't think anyone of us will ever stop missing our loved ones, but I do know that life has so many beautiful things to offer and that the promise of being with them is what keeps me going.
I am so happy to hear that you are hanging in there.
Fondly,
Holly
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She was one of the people that helped me along when I was so terrified (along with Maryanne and Kasey and Aunti Cindi!!) that I didn't think I could make it day to day.
God Bless you Faye!
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Shelley -
I am so glad you have found hope..and your mom's faith in God will help all of you deal with every step of the journey. I always tell people that my mom made this easy on us as she left it up to God (and some good doctors.) This journey is a series of ups and downs, with what you will find to be some fantastic times in between.
There are a lot of "LC daughters" on this board, use us!
Thinking of you,
Holly
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Beth -
I feel for you so very much. Having been in a very similar situation as you...I say "GO." You will never regret it. If work can wait a bit, let it wait. There are stories of lengthy survivals, but I can also tell you that my mom never smoked, had run a marathon months earlier, etc -- and that her adnecarcinoma spread so quickly we will all shocked -- we did all the "right" things - radiation for pain, chemo to help control it, etc. I am so grateful that I was with her....You never know. I pray that you have many trips to visit her.
Most importantly, get her or your stepdad to level with you -- or let you talk to the doctors.
Thinking of you tonight.
Holly
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There is always a possibility, yet be thankful that she doesn't have any symptoms. Mets in the bones are often very, very painful...you can look for all kinds of signs to help you get through til the results of the day....but all the worry in the world is not going to change whatever the results are!
This journey is such a rollercoaster of tests and scans. Somehow you have to put trust in God or whatever you believe in that you will deal with WHATEVER the results may be...and that you will have a plan whether it is to celebrate or to fight even harder.
Praying that you all have peace over the next few weeks!
Holly
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I am so happy that you talked to your regular onc...the nerve of the other guy. I am glad you are looking at all avenues, but I have to say I am going to trust the conventional doctor on this one.
gather your strength and keep fighting.
Thinking of you both,
Holly
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Julie -
I had two huge ones! I don't have time to write right now, but I will cut and paste what I wrote on this site...if you are interested, let me know.
Holly
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Pat, I thought the exact same thing!!!
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Pat -
I must have "missed" all the hub bub -- but YOU should be here. I think I should be here. When I went through everything with my mom, I got great strength and support from people whether they had the dreaded beast, they were a current caregiver or they loss someone to the disease.
you have so much to offer.
Holly
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juicy fruit gum
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You will never regret doing everything you are doing right now. It is such an honor to be with your mom as she prepares to go on an amazing journey. Know that God will take her when he is ready...and that there will be such peace. You are doing God's work right now which is simply beautiful.
So much love for you over the next few days,
holly
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Traci -
Welcome...I am sorry that you are here. Let us know the result of the scans...and know that you can "talk" to any of us. Unfortunately, there are many, many caregivers on this site who understand the journey all too well...but many of us want to return the support we received! I am here for you.
Holly
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Go Joanie! Your fighting spirit is such an inspiration. Prayers this week for some good scans....you have to stay strong to lift that rol-poly little grandbaby.
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I am so sorry. May God's hands lift you up and guide you on the journey the next few months. When you are most down, just remember she is up there keeping an eye on you....and know that you did the most unselfish thing...you let her go.
Peace to you,
Holly
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Alli -
Welcome to this wonderful support group. We are here for you...to support you... to answer questions, whatever you need.
How do you support your mom? Just love her. Once treatment starts you will find tangible things she needs help with...basically just be there with ears open and arms ready to love her.
Many of us daughters know exactly what you are going through...and we are here.
Holly
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Susan -
If the primary tumor is not causing any problems or symptoms, they will usually stop chemo in Stage IV patients if it is not working on the mets (this was my mom's case.) Be very happy that they know this now. In my mom's case, we looked at the CT scan and kept going as the primary was shrinking, yet the cancer was running rampant in the bones.
Once the cancer reaches distant sites, the goal is to slow it and knock it back....a new chemo will hopefully do that.
Just take a deep breath, you will feel so much better once there is a new plan....there are A LOT of chemo protocols out there!
Holly
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Amanda -
Please let us know what the plan is....praying for your dad tonight that he receives renewed energy and "fighting spirit." At the end of the day, it is his choice to fight this shi##y disease.
you are doing a great job.
Holly
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HOORAY!!! A true miracle that you deserve...go Tarceva. I am so happy for you. So very happy.
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Oh Tina -
i am praying for you tonight. You should not be on this journey again....prayers for peace this evening and a "its nothing" report.
Holly
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YOU ARE NOT CRAZY. I am so sorry to chime in late, but what you are feeling...so many of us have or are feeling. It has been a year for me and I still reach for the phone all the time....I have good days and some days that are unbearable. It will get easier for you, I promise. I can't say it gets better, it just gets different.
I really didn't start facing the reality of being momless until my mom was gone about five-six months and then it hit me camck in the face. I think I had so much adrenaline going before that...and I am sure you do as well.
Thank God for your beautiful baby and know that it will get "different."
Love,
Holly
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Crystal -
You are doing everything you can do. We want to get our moms out of pain, to make them comfortable, to give them peace......juts love her. This is in God's hands. Make sure you have said everything you want to say to your mom, try and breath. Take each minute and hour as they come. Don't try to figure out the future... you can't control it.
I don't know what you believe, but I believe that your mom is NOT alone not now, not ever.
We are here for you. Many of us have been down the road you are on right now.
Prayers for all of you tonight. I sent you a PM as well.
Holly
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New Normal
in GRIEF
Val -
This was so beautifully written, and I can relate to so much of it. I always say "I never thought my life would like this." My prayer that I said for years was, "let my parents live to be a big part of my childrens' lives." I thought that meant being sad if they didn't see them graduate from high school..... Yes, the new normal, I "get it." I wonder if I will ever be truly happy again. i went from thinking I had the best life in the world to just being hit in the face...and then, I remember all the good things. I look at my friends who would have killed for a mom like mine or yours. I think part of the new normal is about constantly adjusting the way that you think about things...as you definitely have.
Oh sweet Val, I know it sucks, and I know you just "don't get over it" you just deal with it.
Love to you,
Holly
I knew it was coming
in CAREGIVER RESOURCE CENTER
Posted
Carrie -
I have not posted on this site for some time, but I have read about your mom -- the story is similar to my mom's. Hospice will provide the pain relief she so desperately needs...and it will give you time to say everything you want to say. Someday you will look back and realize what a blessing it is to have time to say goodbye.
If you have questions about end of life at home, I would like to help you as someone on this site did for me. I was with my mom every single day of her diagnosis until the end when I was lying in bed with her. Please contact me, if you think I can take any of the fear or unknown out of it.
I am so sorry, my heart is breaking for you. I know that the fear is overwhelming. Yet, you will have the strength you need for today and the strength you need for tomorrow...you will.
Please know that someone in San Francisco is thinking of you.
holly_nissalke@hotmail.com