-Cheryl-
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Posts posted by -Cheryl-
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Charolette,
My heart is so heavy for your family. How is your husband holding up. Please let him know he is in all of our prayers as well as your family. We are here for you when ever you need us. So sorry about this news. Much love and support,
Cheryl
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Joe,
Thanks for your input. I appreciate your expertise. To all of you, thanks for responding. I hate how obsessed I become about the details of treatment. It has become a new found avocation. I wish I could do anything half-assed (pardon my french.) I am obsessive-compulsive about somethings. I hate that about myself. It can be both a blesssing and a curse. It is forever a battle, to let things so. It doesn't bode well with my "Type A" personality, Ha! I have on the contrary, made great strides in improvement in this area, as you can see, much work is needed still. you guys are so informative though. Fay A., you should have gone to med school yourself! TAnne, how did the brain scan go today. That is by far the most stressful test. I think most will agree here to that. Frankly, I would rather have a root canal. Just thinking about you. Love to you all,
Cheryl
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Lisa,
I wish that it were that cut and dry. We know what can cause cancer, but only 15% of smokers get lung cancer. Your husbands cancer is squamous cell, directly related to smoking. Yet, he did not smoke. I myself have adenocarcinoma- BAC subtype. I can trace 4 generations of people diagnosed with lung cancer in my family, only of which 2 smoked.
My doctor said that it is God's way of eliminating the population. That was not what I wanted to hear, but I suppose he had a valid point. Still, why did I get lung cancer? Why is God picking on me? Am I not a good person? Why not me? These question will drive you crazy. It is really how you perceive yourself. I don't like being a victim, nor a martar. I chose to send out a message. I am trying to help kids from ever starting. I work as a counselor, and am over a Child and Adolescent Mental Health Program. I will not let the Devil have a victory over me. I'll use this disease to help others. I am no body special, but this disease, like it or not, makes me special. I can let it beat me, or use it to stop young people from ever starting smoking. You are in a position to impact other's lives as well!
I can feel sorry for myself, which still happens from time to time, or become active to help others. I quit blaming myself for getting this disease. This is one of the few diseases, where we blame the cancer patient- that is sad to me. Why don't we blame others for their diseases too, like breast cancer patients for their high fat diets? Lisa, I think we are programed genetically to get diseases. I quit smoking, and still got cancer, probably would have anyway. Perhaps my body was programed to self-destruct at a certain age. Not many people get lung cancer as young as I. Biologically, my body is reacting to toxins in the environment. Cancer cells are genetic mutations out of control. Given my family's history of smoking, my Father was a chemical engineer, I grew up outside of Wash. D.C., ran behind bug spraying Deete truck when I was young, used fossil fuels, both parents smoked.... God Lisa the list just goes on. We know what causes LC, but why do certain people get LC? Trying to find the who or what to blame is a fruitless search. Lets focus instead on a cure! Please don't be offended by my post. I don't mean to sound angry, but as a lung cancer survivor, I hate the stigma, and that is what happens when we focus on cause. Lets focus on the Cure instead. Join the crusade to help us find a cure.
Your sister in this war,
Cheryl
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Hey Folks,
I just got back from getting blood work. As most of you kow, I am on a trial CT2103 (or better known as carboplatin/paclitaxol.) The doctor wants me back on Tuesday for more blood work. He wants to check my liver function which is elevated to AST(GOTH 144.0 and ALT(GPTH 208.0. I aso had another aranesp shot due to low WBC and platelets. The doctor said it could be the chemo. or it could be cancer! Cancer in my Liver is all I could think off. I am a worry wart as it is. I will obssess about this till it is resolved!!! Please my friends give, me your consenus on this. What do you think? Could this be from chemo effects, or cancer mets to the liver. I had a CT 2 weeks ago and nothing was there. Could mets evade my liver while on chemo when my kidney mets have shrunk. I want off this roller coaster!!! God I think not knowing may be better, I get less depressed. Please talk some rational sense into me.
Cheryl
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Donaf,
He went so fast. Please accept my most sinere sympathy. I am sorry his wife was not in the room with him mortally, but I bet he was with her spiritually. My prayers for you all,
Cheryl
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Wow! I long to hear those wonderful words myself. God is Great!
Cheryl
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Just know that it is for Katie's sake. It will give Katie a chance to know her mother in a different light, and be a big help to you too. You are a better man for it. You don't have to like it, Ha! I think you will win her respect. You now have mine.
Cheryl
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Curtis,
This will not be an easy trip for you or Georgene. I mean think about it, you and Katie are all Grandma has left of Becky in the physical sense. Georgene cannot court another daughter. And the reality of Becky's death will seem so real when you see old photos and Georgine's face smiling back you. It will not be an easy weekend for anyone involved. I am so impressed that you are taking Katie to see Grandma. You have shown me just how important Katie is to you. Always put her first my friend. That beautiful little girl created by you and Becky is a blessing from God. Never foresake this beautiful treasure.
Sincerely,
Cheryl
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Dolly,
I am so saddened to hear of Kirby's passing. I hope that you are not alone and have family to share your grief. Please accept my deepest condolences.
Cheryl
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Carleen,
I had been looking for your posts, but sorry to have found you in this situation. As tears spill on to my desk at work, I try to think of excuses for my appearance. I wish that I could make it all better for you both, and am so sorry that you two are having to endure such a burden at such a young age. But if you knew that Keith would wind up with such a horrible disease, it would not stop you from loving him the time you have. I am only sorry that this disease may rob you of the years deserved. He is a fighter, and as strong as I have seen. I pray sweet Jesus for more time and a cure.
Amen,
Cheryl
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DEbi,
I am waiting to hear back from a lady named Ann, who lives right on Lake Tawokoni! Thats atleast 5! We could check out any cabins and maybe boating. WE have a pontoon that holds 15 at a time.
Cheryl
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God bless Becky and her family.
-Jack-
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WE will do one of these days! What I would like most is to plan something here at the house, or at the lake Tawakoni. OKDeb had a great idea of trying to block out some cabins at a lake in Oklahoma. You guys suggest the time, place and event? I would love tomeet other survivors. I personally know known.
Cheryl
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Yeah way to go!!! Katie and Rick Rock!!!
Cheryl
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Oh David,
You bet ya. I know just what your going through, as do so many of your friends here. Just know that the chemo is doing its job dear friend. You and your family are in my prayers. God hear my prayers and make this young man healthy and whole. In your precious name Dear Lord,
Cheryl
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Beth,
You are almost there. Don't give up. You can do this, Life is to precious. I wish I were there to cheer you on. Unfortunately, only you can take the slams. You have been through the worst already. Don't give up please! You can and you will make it through this! Do you have anyone to help you?
Cheryl
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Awpoint you bet, anytime.
Cheryl
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Love It!
cheryl
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Welp,
Maybe the timinng is wrong. I guess the party is a bust. Maybe we can plan something to all get together sometime? I know its hard to think about party when you have cancer. I had the wonderful opportunity to meet Don Wood and his son. He is even more pleasant in person. Jack and I look forward to meeting any survivors that come our way! Anyone coming this way give me a holler.
Cheryl
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David,
You sure have done us proud! Why I could burst with pride!!! What spirit and determination. You are incredible!!! You make me want to get out there and try to ride!
Can't wait to see what you do next year! Look out Lance Armstrong! Ha
Cheryl
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Hey David,
We would love you to visit. I would call it more a ranchet than a ranch though. We only have 7 1/2 acres! Ha! But the neighbors have sprawling land as far as the eye can see.
I thank you all for the "Anniversary Wishes." Jack took te picture off to put up another. I will have to get someone with a computer and scaner to put another up. I will get a new one up soon. I am kinda hoping my mare has her baby to post a picture.
Cheryl
Cheryl
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Bob,
Nobody but the good Lord knows when it is our time. Don't be discouraged. God will see you through this time. God Bless you and I send my prayers.
Cheryl
Going Down Hill Fast
in GENERAL
Posted
Oh Angie,
Tears are swelling up and spilling on to my shirt right now. I know only too well of what you speak of. I can remember feeling such guilt. I wanted the suffering to end and felt guilty for hoping God would take him in his sleep, and guilty because I couln't take anymore. I was so tired of my own mental pain. I remember thinking "this isn't my father." It was horrible, and I too will probably die that same way. Death is very unpleasant. It is so not fair. Cancer is the worst disease, because it does rob you of your dignity. My poor Daddy, he kept apollogizing for me having to wipe his butt. Iwould just tell him, "Hey, look how many times you did that for me!"
It shouldn't be too much longer now. I know how you too hate to see your father suffer like this, but really he is not in any pain, God is merciful. It is just so hard to watch I know. I would ask my Dad if he knew me, and he would say "your my baby." My Dad had lucid moments, despite the tumor growing on his brain stem.
Angie, it took years to not be mad at God for taking him, or him for not fulfilling his promise of "living forever." I really believed him. I was such a Daddy's girl. The one consolation, is knowing that his death was painless. It comforts me in my own disease. I do not want to die yet, but know that when it is time, I will not suffer. God has promised me eternity, and I trust and have faith in our Lord. Our time here is really so brief. WE all have to die. Angie, do not despair though, you will see him again in all his glory. Please PM me if you like. May the lord comfort you in your fear and sorrow.
Much Love,
Cheryl