Debi

Addie, Yeah, put me down for the "this sucks" column... I think that you'll feel better once you have a plan. Its crap knowing that you have something, but not knowing exactly what or what the plan of action is. Too bad we don't have our doctor's cell phone numbers, huh? I'm keeping everything crossed for you that your other test brings back good results for you. Wishing you some type of inner peace for now (even if it involves massive bloody marys)....

Cindi: Well, I think I've stopped with the cuss words enough to actually post now... I know you recently asked about my boss. I'm thinking maybe we can have him try to sniff out your mojo, you know how good he is at this kind of stuff. No joke - He just found a stain in the carpet today, was able to determine it was koolaid, and now wants us to do our best to find the guilty culprit (probably by the big koolaid stained smile they are undoubtedly wearing) so that we can give them a disciplinary action for spilling their drink !!! I'm thinking if we send him on the trail of your missing mojo, he will surely find it.... Anyway Cindi, you know I'm in your corner over here cheering you on. Thinking of you girl, and knowing you will bounce back with a vengeance !!!

Melody, If I were unsure about the surgeon's advice, I would get a second opinion, but quickly. Although lung surgery sounds HUGE, and is definitely scary, please don't allow your fear to make you drag your feet. Alot of the people with lung cancer would give anything to be "lucky" enough to have lung surgery, people who have their cancer surgically removed have increased odds of survival. My nodule was in an area that couldn't be biopsied either, and the surgeon operated believing that it was a 50/50 chance that it was malignant. I had no other choice but to have the surgery done since there was something in my lung, and it was growing. During surgery, they did take a wedge first which tested malignant, and then they did the lobectomy. So I had major surgery and lost 2 of my right lobes. And believe it or not, it was a small price to pay to be able to be sitting here typing this. I promise you if you need the surgery, you can make it through it. Good luck and keep us posted!!

Wow, I think I made it in time!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY CONNIE!!!!!!! Thank you for sticking around and for all the support you give, ALL the time!!!!

My sympathies are with you and I hope that the memories of your time together help ease your pain..

Sherrie, I am so sorry to hear of Carrie's death. My sympathies are with you at this time.

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and stops to entertain at a bar. He's going through his usual run of stupid blonde jokes when a big blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and says, "I've heard just about enough of your denigrating blonde jokes, buddy. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does a person's physical attributes have to do with their worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in my community, of reaching my full potential as a person... because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes but also women in general, all in the name of humor." Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to apologize, when the blonde pipes up, "You stay out of this mister. I'm talking to that little jerk on your knee."

You know what Cindy? Isn't it great that she CAN move out, that you are well enough that she doesn't feel like she HAS to stay? How cool is that???? THAT said, I know exactly how you feel! When my daughter left home I thought I would die, the LIGHT was gone from my home. I spent days crying. It's funny how our whole lives with our children is a continual process of letting go, but the act of doing that never gets any easier. Anyway, no magic advice, just empathy. Oh, and you can always do what I did to get over the empty nest syndrome (your not alone, they even have a name for it!), have another child.

Welcome Jamie!!

Don't feel bad, I was in the same boat sort of. A shadow was spotted in my lung in January, and I had to have a chest CT. That showed a 11m node, but they didn't know if I had had it my whole life or not. I then had a PET scan in February which didn't light up, but I was told that could be because it was so small. Then they gave me different blood tests, a TB test, etc to see if it could be from something else. After ALL that, I was told to come back in 2 months for another CT to see if it grew, since the tests were so inconclusive and my 'spot' also was in a place where they couldn't biopsy. When I went back in April, it had grown so they then sent me to a Pulmonologist (I waited 3 weeks for an appointment) who I absolutely hated. I found my own, went for a 2nd opinion after another 3 week wait, and he sent me right to the surgeon down the hall. Only problem was, the surgeon was going on a 2 week vacation in a week, so I was going to have to wait till the middle of June, over 3 weeks for surgery. They both said it would be okay to wait, and THEY were affiliated with Cancer Treatment Center of America. Anyway, I am still here, can you believe it? I know others have had similiar waits (although I think I'm one of the longer ones) because the doctors don't want to perform the surgery needlessly. When I went into surgery, they actually still didn't know if it was cancer, I was told I had a 50/50 chance. The one good thing, by that time, almost FIVE months after the initial "sighting', I was READY for surgery, I wanted the damn thing OUT, whatever it was... I wish you and your family the best of luck with your FIL. I will be watching the boards to see what the surgeon tells him on the 16th! Whatever it is, please remember that there are plenty here who have been through whatever it may be...

Rich, Rich, Rich ... I'm going to be the odd "man" out here. While I appreciate the fine art of medical manipulation - I really think that you need an xray of your chest and now, not later. 7 months is a long time to go without one, especially at a year. I know how we want the "what I don't know can't hurt me" mentality, but we also know that that doesn't quite apply to lung cancer. And a doctor listening to your lungs isn't necessarily going to "hear" if there is a problem. Anyway, I'm really not one to give unsolicited lectures, because I am basically insane at test times, as you know! I just felt the need to be devil's advocate. I know you went through the wringer of tests before and I would hate all that to influence you into not getting the tests you need now... I was going to make a comment about the doctor making house calls but decided to take a higher road; I'm the moderator for crying out loud...

Peggy, After awhile, no matter how hard you try to think, there just seems to be nothing left to type. I'm so sorry seems like so little to say but its all I have Peggy. I hope that it helps you a little, knowing we are here and thinking of you.

Pat, Thinking of both you and Brian tonight!

Francine was funny, and warm, and smart. I'm so sorry she is gone. Thank you Gilles for letting us know..

I was just thinking tonight that I haven't seen Francine in a long time. Although she hasn't posted since January, I used to see her name down at the bottom, that she was here, checking the board. It used to make me feel better, knowing she was okay. Has any of the old timers here heard from her??

Fay, I apologize that I only saw this post yesterday. And then I started answering it, but didn't really have words to type. So I stopped and thought I would start again today, this time with your words. THe quote on the top of my post is something you had written in response to one of my posts, a year ago. You know how sometimes someone says something that somehow gets through layers of your own thoughts and it actually sticks somewhere? Well, that line did it for me. Somewhere between the brain cells of what I did with my 2nd boyfriend on summer vacation and what I need to pick up at the grocery store, there is a brain cell with your words in it, loud and clear, telling me that lung cancer doesn't define ME. It has helped me to grow. You have lived that line, you have showed everyone that even if you have lung cancer, that is just a part of you. You have also shown that you need to kick *ss and take an active role in your own medical care. You have shown everyone this by not just typing it but by living it, every day. As you embark on this new road, I have no qualms that you will kick *ss once again, with or without oxygen. As I have said before, you are a warrior princess Fay, or goddess, whichever you prefer. This is who YOU are, with or without lung cancer. I am boiling a chicken and various vegetables in your honor tonight in the chicken cults' secret time honored ritual (a non cult member would call this making chicken soup). I'm rooting for you woman, as always...

Oliver, I don't have any advice for you but wanted to let you know you are not alone with these insurance woes... The ONLY reason I am still at my job is the insurance. To Cobra out, for me and my son, is almost $800.00 a month, which I really can't afford to take on. I live in a small town so 'decent' jobs, which would start me right off on another insurance, are pretty scarce. I'm afraid to just out and out quit, and NOT have insurance for any amount of time because I'm not sure if another carrier would take me on when I got a new job because of my 'pre-existing' condition if there is a lapse. Otherwise, I would have quit long ago and worked two jobs at half the pay each, just to get out of my work situation. Its the insurance that stops me. So basically, I am in a similar insurance boat (the Titanic!) as you. Sorry to go on, I have no advice, just empathy!! Fear of no medical insurance is a constant companion over here...

Since I started this, I suppose that its only fair, that I also am the last . And what a great ending, talking about my friend Eileen... Eileen, you remind me of home and I am so glad that we are friends. From the beginning, you have been there for me; it is always so great to find someone that thinks so much like yourself (scary too! ). You are a shining beacon of hope for so many people (including me) with your long term survivorship! Your posts are always honest, and even when you have a different point of view, your posts always have class. You weigh your words carefully, when I see your name somewhere, I know that you have something important to add.. Thank you for being here and for staying here to share your strength and wisdom Eileen. I, for one, have benefited much from it and from your support!

I haven't gone through radiation but I think its time to get a second opinion. I'm not sure, I'm not a doctor of course, but I have never heard of brain radiation as a precautionary measure, especially when the brain MRI's have been clear. Maybe someone with more experience in this will have a different answer. I would go with my gut feeling though, when something doesn't seem right, it at least merits a second look. Good luck!

Congrats Dee, on your anniversary!!

Congrats on the three years!!!

Well, I'm not sure either if you can post twice but I started the dang thread and Kasey already broke the 2 post rule , so the heck with it. Cindy, you have been there with me though every ache and pain, every perceived met and the dreaded scans. We have laughed at ourselves and compared neurosis on more than one occasion (okay, maybe 10). At any time I can PM you with any ailment, or you me, and the reply comes back with "Oh no, I felt/thought/did that too!" You even have "popped" like I do. You are truly a friend. Your posts to others are always sensible, and always encouraging. I am SO glad that you are on this board, and even though we don't always have the time to correspond, just knowing you are here and seeing your name makes me always feel a little bit better. Thanks Cindy, for being so wonderful and even more so, for sticking around here with me!

Well Pam, am SO glad that you got great news. It's so funny how every little action the doctor and his/her office does is under our scrutiny... I wonder if the doctors are aware of how much we look for all those little signs before our results???? Anyway, congratulations on your clear xray! Don't be a stranger, we would love for you to stick around and post now and then, I have a feeling you probably have some great jokes. Frank does a terrible job down in the Just for Laughs Forum and can certainly use all the help he can get with posts. Again, I'm happy for you. You need to celebrate!!

WOW Connie!! Congratulations on the 10 year mark. I am so glad you are here, and have stuck around to be a power of example for the rest of us. You go Girl!!!

Pam, So glad to see your post woman!! I'm sure everything will be fine tomorrow, I will be waiting to hear. And you are not a wimp to worry, it is perfectly normal to worry about the results of your xray. Good luck with your appointment,will be thinking of you! Thanks for taking the plunge and posting, many people can identify with the feelings that you're going through!