Marykf

Hi everyone, I just thought I'd give you an update after the concert. James did not get to meet the band or anything, but he had a great time at the concert, he loved it as usual. I did end up getting in contact with a friend who is a DJ and he contacted RK's manager but it was apparently not meant to be since some of the band guys were sick so they weren't up to doing extra stuff that night I guess. Anyway thanks for your support. Kim I will have to get that Mercy Me CD, it sounds like it was really meaningful to you. God certainly has a way of reaching us through music. Mary

I thought this song might touch some other folks who have had a loved one die from lung cancer. This has just blown me away, in a good way, it is just so amazing to me. My husband Ben died 11/5/06 from lung cancer that had metas to meningial lining of the brain (leptomeningeal carcinomatous). Ben had only been diagnosed with lung cancer 5 weeks earlier and the LC was diagnosed a week before he died. He was 44. My son James' favorite band is RelientK, they are a punk rock, mainstream Christian band. He has been a HUGE fan for years (James is 17 about to turn 18 ). Relient K released a new CD yesterday, (I had to go out and buy it first thing yesterday morning ) and this song Deathbed is on it. The song is quite a departure from their usual punk rock tunes, it is for one thing extremely long, 11 minutes, and it is "lyrical ballad" rather melancholy and definately a very different kind of tune for them, not at all punk rock. This is just amazing to me that this band would release this album with this song on it just 4 months and one day since Ben died. Because it is all about a man dying from lung cancer, a smoker for 30 years, an alcoholic who came to know Jesus. That all describes my husband. Here are the words: I can smell the death on the sheets Covering me I can't believe this is the end But this is my deathbed I lie here alone If I close my eyes tonight I know I'll be home The year is 1941 I was eight years old and far, far too young To know that the stories of battles and glory Was a tale a kind mother made up for a son You see, Dad was a traveling preacher Teaching the words of the teacher Mother had sworn he went off to the war And died there with honor, somewhere on a beach there But he left once to never return Which taught me that I should unlearn Whatever I thought a father should be I abandoned that thought like he abandoned me By '47, I was fourteen I'd acquired a taste for liquor and nicotine I smoked until I threw up, yet I still lit 'em up For thirty more years, like a machine So right there you have it That one filthy habit Is what got me where I am today I can smell the death on the sheets Covering me I can't believe this is the end I can hear the sad memories Still haunting me So many things I'd do again But this is my deathbed I lie here alone If I close my eyes tonight I know I'll be home Got married on my twenty-first Eight months before my wife would give birth It's easier to be sure you love someone When a father inquires with the barrel of a gun The union was far from harmonious No two people could've been more alone than us The years would go by and she'd love someone else And I'd realized I hadn't been loved yet myself From there it's your typical spiel Yeah, if life was a highway, I was drunk at the wheel I was helpin' the loose ends all fall apart Yeah, I swear I was destined to fail, and fail from the start I bowled about six times a week A bottle of Beam kept the memories from me Our marriage had taken a 7?10 split And along with my pride, the ex-wife took the kids I can smell the death on the sheets Covering me I can't believe this is the end I can hear those sad memories Still haunting me So many things I'd do again But this is my deathbed I lie here alone If I close my eyes tonight I know I'll be home I was so scared of Jesus but he sought me out Like the cancer in my lungs it's killing me now And I've given up hope on the days I have left But I cling to the hope of my life in the next Then Jesus showed up, said, "Before we go I thought that we might reminisce See, one night in your life, when you turned out the lights You asked for and prayed for my forgiveness "You cried wolf; the tears they soaked your fur The blood dripped from your fangs You said, 'What have I done?' You loved that lamb with every sinful bone And there you wept alone Your heart was so contrite "You said, 'Jesus, please forgive me of my crimes Sanctify this withered heart of mine Stay with me until my life is through And on that day, please take me home with you' " I can smell the death on the sheets Covering me I can't believe this is the end I can hear you whisper to me "It's time to leave You'll never be lonely again" But this was my deathbed I died there alone When I closed my eyes tonight You carried me home I am the way Follow me and take my hand And I am the truth Embrace me and you'll understand And I am the light? And for me you'll live again For I am love I am love I am love If you read all that I'll tell you that there are some striking similarities to Ben's life. Ben died of lung cancer. He had smoke cigarettes since he was 15, and he died one month short of his 45th birthday, that would be 30 years. Ben was a recovering alcoholic, 12 years sober when he died. Ben loved the Lord and knew Jesus was waiting to take him to his new home when he was on his deathbed. I am just crying over this. I think James & I both feel this song is a gift to us. James is going to the Relient K concert at the Electric Factory in Philadelphia this Saturday, March 10. I was thinking it would so great for James to be able to meet the band backstage or something and tell them how much this song has meant to him, how it has such a special meaning to him about his fathers death. I have no idea how to make that happen. If anyone here has any ideas or knows anyone that might be able to help I'd appreciate the input. Thanks Mary -------------------- Ben my husband for 22 years & my best friend I will always love & miss you 12/14/61 - 11/5/06