This seems like it has been going on forever. I hate to say it, but I am waiting for this to be over. I feel really guilty about that, but reality is that she is suffering. I am trying very hard to get my sister in law to accept the inevitable, but she won't. I have told her numerous times to say she will be alright to my mil, but she won't because she feels she is lying. I told her it will take lots of time, but you will eventually be okay. I think she will regret it when it is over. I know my mil is hanging on because of her mother and her daughter, who both are still holding on to miracles. She never wanted treatment but went along with it after a month or so because of their pleas. She said from the start she wanted quality time not to be sick for quantity time. It is so sad to say but she has been sick from September, with very few good days. When she is lucid and kind of shakes from her trance-like state, she says she hates herself now and how she is! She calls out her own name, asking where is Elizabeth, only to be reminded that she is Elizabeth. Then she gets mad about it. It is so heartbreaking. Maybe her putting up such a fight when they try to feed and hydrate her, is her way of regaining some control? So sad... :cry My husband's aunt called the other night wanting him to come home (we live in another state). He went to see his mom in September, when she was still herself. We tried to get back but they refused to hear it. Due to us having 8 children, it is not easy to just pack up and go. Even for just my husband to go, we have to plan it, find a place to stay etc... I have offered numerous times to have my husband go back, but they didn't want him to. We kind of resolved it for ourselves by sending things to my mil, pictures, crafts from the kids, etc... I have had the kids call weekly to talk to my fil. I made a beautiful patchwork quilt for her, with each patch having a picture of one of us sewn on. We decided my husband and I, possibly our two youngest who are under two, will just go to the wake/funeral. I don't know what to say about him not going in right now. I wonder if she would even know him.