Beachmama

Thanks again you all. My mom was admitted to the hospital last night. She has a bacteria on her lung that caused a fever and she has low oxygen levels. (This is her second time in the hospital for this in the past month!) Katie, I feel like you are right when you say that tthe doctor may not be offering more options for my mom because she is not doing her part but living a healthier lifestyle. We all feel that way, really.(my family) And maybe my mother is too weak to handle the harsh chemos, and that is why she didn't offer it. Now that we know it is a bacteria on her lung, how can we safely give more chemo when she cannot get well from THIS NEW problem. Mom has already had maximum radiation. They cannot operate. It's either chemo or nothing, (I assume.) Well, I will keep you posted. It looks like mom will be going home with an OXygen tank. She cannot breathe. All of this news is very grim to me. I feel like this is the beginning of the end.

Thank you all so much for your replies. I am so grateful for this board. I feel so comforted by your words. Mom has Small cell LC, limited, on one lung. It is the size of a tangerine, and growing. The biggest problem with her is that she still smokes and surrounds herself with second hand smoke as well. Helping her seems impossible. And she is resistant to changing doctors. But I feel like we have no other choice. If there are more choices, why doesn't the doc recommend them? It's mind boggling. She did mention a possible clinical trail in Miami. But she didn't seem hopeful or confident when she nonchalantly mentioned it.... I was the one who mentioned trying the carboplatin/etopiside combo again, which she had first line. The doc casually said "we can try it". It's just so frustrating and leaves us feeling hopeless. Well, I will look into this clinical trail and seek out a new doc. Thank you all so much for your opinion and advice.

Hi everyone. I am at a loss here. My mom has been receiving chemo (second line) for the past year and it has not been working. Her first line was Cystplatin and Vp 16 and her second line consisted of Topecatan then when that caused a blood clot, and the cancer grew more, they switched her to Taxotere. And her most recent scan showed the tumor had grown even more. The doctor really had nothing to offer. She said THIS was the standard treatments and were effective on others. I suggested more Cystplatin, since it worked the first time. (She was cancer "free" for 9mos) My questions to you are- Have you or your loved ones had this treatment plan? Did it work on anyone? Should we get a second opinion? (it's seems like alot of work to hear the same things) Would you get a second opinion? She is taking weekly chemo and the tumor is growing. 6mos ago the tumor was 3.3cms. Now it is 5.9cms. That is alot of growth WITH TREATMENT! My mom is getting very sick and tired. She is almost giving up. And I KNOW she doesn't want the platins.....But I donn't know what else to do or say. I feel so defeated. And how big can a tumor grow before it just takes her? I am so lost and confused. And I feel really alone. I hope you may have some insight for me. Thanks. Connie

Hi there! My mom had 6 months of topecatan and did not have any itching. She had mild symptoms, the worst of which was nausea and fatigue. I hope you get some feedback from the onc this week. Good luck to you and your mom. You are in my prayers.

Well, just wanted to update everyone on my mom. She just finished her last round of topecatan last week. (for now) She has had almost 20 treatments and the latest scan showed no marked improvement. But it hasn't grown either. Just stayed the same. Her hair is starting to thin again and she is very depressed. We are confused as to why the chemo isn't working. And she continues to smoke. So we don't know what to do or say to her. She is becoming very weak as well (gaining weight, fell down 4 times last week, losing her balance). I think the doc wants her to take a break over the holidays, but doesn't say what the plan is. I guess this is our journey with this disease. I hope you all are well and are having a nice holiday season. Any ideas or suggestions or experiences are welcome. Thanks. Connie

Well, mom just had her third round of Topecetan. And so far so good. She feels mostly tired and sick to her stomach. But her WBC is high! And no hair loss yet. She is really strong and seems almost "energized" by the chemo. It's weird, but she is fighting it. I pray we can put it back into remission. She took a chest xray (waiting for results) and in 3 weeks will do another ct scan to see where we are. 6-9 rounds has been ordered, so she might be half way done. She said this drug is MUCH better than Cysplatin and Carboplatin. 100 times better. Thanks for all your prayers.

My mom had a bad time with the first round of chemo. She was so sick, I came to this board and started screaming that I couldn't allow her to go on anymore....it was pretty emotional and painful for her and for US to see. But, I have to say, it got rid of the cancer for a while. It's almost two years since diagnosis. Unfortunately, it did come back and she's started chemo again. She seems to be tolerating it well for now. But, your question is funny to me. I think your friend could get some relief from hash or pot. I actually told my mom to try it, if she thought it would help with the nausea. She laughed. But she didn't But I though it was a fine idea. Your friend has to weigh his decisions. If he doesn't treat the small cell it WILL grow quite quickly. And that is scary. He can get thru this. I fhe wants to try some hash, I would think it couldn't hurt. Not doing the chemo might hurt more. I wish you and him the best of luck. Hang in there.

Hi everyone, I wanted to ask you for any advice you have about the chemo Topotecan. My moms small cell has returned and this will be her new chemo. The doc actually told her that her hair will not fall out. However this is not what the paperwork shows. Mom's hair just grew back and now, aside from having cancer again, she's upset about losing her hair again. Well, anyway, we are just now processing the news. Disappointed of course, but I just want to give mom some advice from you all and maybe some good news. Thanks. Connie

Thank you all for your wise words and support. Just to update, mom continues to smoke daily. But I do not mention it. I have NOT told the rest of the family about it either. It is not my wish to upset her. I am just so disgusted that she started smoking again after being free for a year!!! NOW, her cough is back with a vengeance, and she of course smells like the smoke and it ends up all over the baby when she is here, (which is daily). I AM happy that she she is ALIVE and HERE to be with us. But the thing about my mom is that RIGHT NOW she is CANCER-FREE!!! and she is just TEMPTING FATE. SHe absolutley cannot imagine going thru chemo again. And neither can I, frankly. I just shutter at the thought of it. ANd she just laughs in cancer's face. Like as if to say "bring it on!". And after allllllllllllllll the radiation, and alllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll the chemo. And being smoke-free for a year......it's just terrible. And I hate it. And she's so non-nonchalant about it. Lighting her cig while on the phone with me, taking drags./....It's like a BIG SLAP in my FACE. She can't even be discreet. She can't wait til we hang up. My sisters would totally FREAK OUT of they knew. I am the least of my mothers troubles. She better hope they don't find out. But, whatever happens you know and she knows that I'll be there for her. But I will be angry. And will never forgive her for smoking. BUt I will be strong for her and support her. It just seems like she's inviting the cancer back to her sore lungs after so much trauma. I almost cannot believe it.

Thank you all for your support, except Ellen in PA. Who pointed out so rudely that I am the one with the problem, not my mother. Unfortunately, accepting her smoking is like forgiving an abusive spouse over and over again, making excuses for him. I know it must be sooooo hard to quit, I understand that. But I KNOW she did quit for a while. Maybe a year... But now she started back up. It's just crazy. I have always hated my mother smoking. I will never be okay with it. And luckily, I am the only one in the family who knows this info for sure. My sisters would REALLY give her a hard time. I will never tell them, because I don't mom to get upset. It is her business, and her life. And it doesn't directly affect me, except for the smell, which does. And the unknown future where I will taking care of her again, while she cries and cries. But I will try to sit here quietly while she gets punched. Cancer sucks and so does smoking. I don't smoke thanks to years of inhaling my mothers disgusting cigarettes for18 years. I guess that's something good.

Thanks everyone for your insightful responses. I know where I stand on this topic, but I don't have to like it. I told mom I knew that she was smoking.(she didn't deny it) I told her that I hate the way it makes her smell. (she smokes indoors and in her car). She reeks! And that is the worst part of it. We smell after she hugs us (and my kids). It's just gross. But I do love her. I do. Just not the smoke. Oh well. Thanks again.

I just found out that mom is still smoking. Someone close to me saw her puffing away in her car at a red light!!! I had a feeling she was smoking, but she would always deny it when I asked her. My questions to you all is what do I do??? I KNOW I cannot make her stop. Is she really making it worse by smoking, or is the 40 years worth of smoking just too hard to undue and it really won't matter if she quits or lites up? I am so angry right now. I want to say something to her, but what? She just got a clean bill of health and this is how she celebrates! What would you do? Connie

Just wanted to let you all know the good news. Mom had a broncoscopsy last Thursday and we got the results back yesterday. NEGATIVE!!! The doctor could tell the minute he looked down there that it was not small cell. He said the lung is slightly inflamed and probably scarred from all the radiation. And that was what kept showing up on the scans. What a blessing! Thanks for all your prayers and support. I feel like we can all breathe a little now. And mom can get a nice hair cut and dye finally!!! Thought you all would like to know.

Thanks Katie, I checked out that website, it's really great. SO, here is the UPDATE. Mom's latest scan (CT) showed the same shadow, or spot. It apparently "lit up". It's the size of a lima bean. The good news is that it could be anything, says the doc. It is located directly on the spot that was radiated. It needs to be biopsied to know for sure. The bad news is that it has doubled in size since May. (it has apparently been there that long). Mom was given antibiotics to clear up any infection and has referred her back to the lung specialist for the biopsy. If it is an infection or inflammation, is it common for it to change in size?? I didn't go with her to the appointment, so I still have unanswered questions. Just wanted to update you all.

Your attitude is awesome Rob! You are an inspiration. I will keep you in my prayers. Cancer sucks. Keep yourself strong and just take one day at a time. You can do this.