LovesLife

Hi Debbie - sorry you had need to join, but sure glad you found us. I can tell you from my experience that at the beginning and up until shortly after surgery I was afraid, but very in control of my emotions because I didn't want to upset my family. It was after my surgery that I started acting obsessive - I made up an entire binder (complete with index) on my type of cancer. I was doing this secretly (my husband and kids had no idea) and when I pulled out this monstrosity of a binder at my 3 month appointment and started asking dozens of questions I can still see the shock on both my husband and the surgeon's face. So, while I was quite capable as going through each day with people thinking I was "amazingly strong" or had "such a great attitude" I was falling apart inside. Perhaps right now you are still in shock from the diagnosis or perhaps this is just how you deal with stress. Either way no one is right or wrong, or normal or abnormal - it just is "us" and our own individual journey. You have found a safe place to discuss what you are feeling (or not, whatever the case may be) and we will listen, or prop you up, or send you cyber hugs when needed. Looking forward to hearing from you more. Linda

Prayers coming your way Randy! Hugs, Linda

Howdy to you Nick! Welcome ... let us know how we can help. Linda

Welcome to this wonderful group of people. What an encouraging story you have and it will help so many - thank you. Congratulations on 3 years - wishing you many, many more!!! Judy - I think Gilda had ovarian cancer, but I could be wrong. I think Gilda's Club is for all cancer survivors - I could be mistaken though - I don't believe they have that here in Canada. I have heard nothing but wonderful things about the organization though (Dr. West also speaks very highly of it). Linda

Sending you and your loved ones many thoughts and prayers during this difficult time Barb. Hugs, Linda

(((Barbara))) - I am so terribly sorry to hear of Bill's passing. I had been thinking about you both over the past few days. I am so thankful he had a peaceful passing and had no pain during hospice-that is a blessing. Keeping you in my heart and in my prayers. Many hugs, Linda

Mike - please send it on to whoever will listen - I don't care whose name is signed as it speaks for all of us. The more people we reach, the louder our voice. Thanks for taking the time to continue moving it forward. Linda

Following is an e-mail I just sent to the Canadian Cancer Society - we'll see what happens... Dear Debora: I am a survivor who was diagnosed with a rare form of lung cancer (coming up to 4 years on June 20th) and had a lobe of my lung removed. I belong to several lung cancer boards helping others who are faced with the same frightening diagnosis. I have heard many disparaging comments about the American/Canadian Cancer Society's with regard to the way they treat lung cancer. It seems the only propaganda is to "quit smoking"; however, it is well known that former and non-smokers make up the majority of current lung cancer statistics. It is the cancer that kills the most and blames the victim the most. I have been entertaining the idea of putting together a work team to participate in the Relay; however, I am having conflicting emotions. Last year, while attending the Survivor's dinner the most talked about cancer was breast cancer and the least talked about was lung cancer. Then, only a fifteen second comment on smoking and how it causes lung cancer. If this was true would not EVERY smoker have lung cancer and NO non-smokers ever be afflicted. It is such a burden to carry guilt and shame when diagnosed with a life threatening disease. Is there any possibility that the Canadian Cancer Society can move up with the times and educate in a manner such as "Desperate Housewives" Kathryn Joosten did last week (awesome episode for those with lung cancer and don't blame the victim comment!) No one knows who will be diagnosed with this disease - it could be genetics, the food supply, or the environmental toxins we are all exposed to. I HATE that the first question out of someone's mouth upon learning of my diagnosis is "Did you smoke?" No-one ever asks a colon cancer/breast cancer patient - did you eat too much fat and not enough fruits and vegetables. A cancer patient should NEVER have to explain "why" cancer exists in their body. I want to be part of a movement that educates and informs - not belittles and criticizes. I know I am a little voice, but perhaps others will join and I can create a louder voice. Is there any way you can help make my voice be heard? Debora's response was wonderful - "I would be thrilled to pass on your letter to those that have input into our policy making! Thanks so much for sharing your experiences. I have dealt with her in the past and I know she cares - perhaps this will be the start of some changes. I will keep you updated. Hugs to everyone, Linda (Sorry it was so lengthy!)

Lynnie - I am so horribly sorry for the loss of your dad. What a wonderful tribute to him - your words of deep love and respect...he sounds like such a special man. I will say a special prayer for your dad Timothy at Mass on Saturday. Peace be with you and yours. Hugs, Linda

Hi Van55 - I am sorry that you have need to be here, but I welcome you to this family. I remember all too well the beginning when the testing was just starting - it is gut wrenching and difficult to be patient waiting for results. It sounds, though, that things are moving fairly quickly for you and soon you will have a plan in place. There is hope - lung cancer can be beaten! There are many who have done just that on these boards ... yes, your story can be one of hope to someone else who is new someday. Most importantly ... don't listen to statistics - you are not a statistic - you are a human being and there is no expiration date on your foot. It is good you have your kids to help you through the process - take all the help you can get - both emotionally and physically. Keep us posted - we care. Linda

Bonnie - I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. I am wishing you peace and strength in the difficult days, weeks and years ahead and my heart is heavy for you. Take care of yourself as best you can and don't forget to ask for help when and however you need it. Hugs, Linda

Carol - a very late congratulations on 5 years (I am ALWAYS late to the party it seems!) I am with you 100% on a cure for this horrid disease. God Bless you too. Hugs, Linda

Oh Tina - this simply CANNOT be happening. I will be keeping you and your FIL in my prayers. Hugs, Linda

Barbara - for some reason words are failing me at this time, but I will just speak what my heart feels. I find it unbelievable that with what you are going through with your beloved Bill right now, that you take the time to remind each and every one of us how there are many blessings still to be seen, even in the worst of times. In this crazy and busy world it is often easy to forget the many things to be thankful for. My Nan used to always say to me "Look for the silver lining in any situation and you will always find at least one". You brought back so many memories of my beloved Nan and her words of wisdom. I thought her to be the most wise and wonderful woman who ever walked this earth, but today I do believe there is another and her name is Barbara. I am happy that you are able to still see the blessings through the pain you are experiencing. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving me that memory of my Nan and for giving of yourself at such a vulnerable time. Many hugs and wishing you many blessings today and always, Luv, Linda

(((Barb))) I am so sorry to read about the loss of your friend Linda. My sincere condolences to all her family and friends. Linda

Barb - I, too, am sorry that this scan wasn't what you had hoped for. Hopefully another 4 weeks of Prednisone will eliminate the inflammation and you can move to 6 month scans. Keeping you in my thoughts Barb. Hugs, Linda

Ned - I am sorry to hear of what you have been going through and I am sincerely wishing you smoother sailing from here on in! Linda

Hi Claudia - I am so sorry you have need to be here; however, I am so glad you found us. You will find hope and support here from this wonderful group of people. Linda

Thanks Stephanie! Good luck with your scan today - looking forward to hearing good news. Linda

Whoo hoo - glad to hear from you Melanie! You are one tough cookie and I know you are going to be just fine. I had a tough time sleeping too as I wasn't used to sleeping on my back - eventually I just got tired enough and fell asleep no matter how I was positioned Anyhow, glad to know you are on the mend. Take care. Luv, Linda

Hi Debi - sorry I hadn't heard anything; however, Bruce has (posted in General) and apparently she was released from the hospital on Friday and should be posting here soon. Sounds like good news! Linda

Dawn - I am smiling just like Katie's cat! Congratulations!!! Linda

I received an e-mail from Melanie's sister about her surgery. It was very successful! She went in at 8 a.m. and the surgeon went to talk to the family at 1:45 p.m. Apparently it took longer than anticipated due to scar tissue, but the surgeon stated she/he hadn't seen lungs as healthy as Melanie's in a very long time. She/he also made a smaller incision than usual so she could have a smaller scar. The family is thankful for all the support and prayers. Hugs, Linda

(((Barb))) ... I continue to keep you and Bill in my prayers every day. Reading through your story was like reading a romance novel - so full and love and determination on both your parts. You have something that is rare these days - a treasure trove of love that no amount of money can equate to. As you both continue on this journey, both with happy moments and sad moments, I hope you know that there are many all over the world who are holding you dear in their hearts. God Bless, Linda

Hey Melanie - from my perspective I would say the IV would compare to the epidural - I didn't think it hurt at all. As to the freaking out and not sleeping and anxiety ... I would be concerned about you if you weren't doing all the above. This is absolutely the most nerve wracking thing anyone can go through and honestly, the fact that you are dealing with it as well as you are absolutely amazes me. I also had a very positive attitude, but you know what ... there are moments and will continue to be moments when negative thoughts, bad feelings and sheer fear will invade your mind. Embrace those for the time you need to and then get back to the kick &$& attitude that you typically have. I can't tell you not to worry because I did when it involved me - all I can say is I am here for you to listen and to help you get back to that positive side when need be. I also found keeping a journal to be a HUGE help to me during that time. I did not want to burden/scare my family with my dark thoughts and fears and that is when I would write and write and write. It would help purge those emotions because truly, we do need to let them out in one fashion or another in order to regain sanity. Hang tough sweetie - you're almost there! Luv, Linda