simplyklb

Dad's tired today. Right now the intake nurse from palliative nurse is here. Kristi

The wedding was wonderful! We all had such a great time! My two closest friends were there and we just had a wonderful time. No drama hardly at all. I was shocked that my dad wanted to stay as late as he did. Kristi

We are all going. Dad feels OK to go. A neighbor is letting us borrow a wheelchair. I would not miss my niece's wedding for anything in the world. Poor kid has enough turmoil in her life with her Dad's kidney disease. Kristi

My dad is very demanding so he does not get it. My mom sometimes she gets itm sometimes she doesn't. Pallative care is coming in tomorrow. Thank goodness! Medicare will cover it since my dad is pretty much housebound. He doesn't go anywhere except to medical appts. I seriously doubt he makes it to my niece's wedding later today. I will be damned if I am stucj at home with him. I feel like a freaking prisoner in my own home. Kristi

Real nice... I can't even get someone to go get a case of free nutrition for my folks and they work a mile down the road from the organization. I am sooo sick of all of this. If it were not for outsiders, I would walk away and never look back. If it were not for my best friend, I don't know what I would do. She has gone way beyond the call of duty and she is not part of my family. Kristi

I made a call today for nutritional services for folks. They are eligible for a case of carnation breakfast thru Cancer Action Inc., here in KC. I have three family members who work in the vicinity of the office.. One of them will have the responsibility of picking up the case or cases each month while my parents are in treatment. I also asked about a cane for my dad. They will provide one for him at no charge. I will donate it back when he done with it. Kristi

Hi Carole, I was not a happy camper when I wrote that post. LOL Mom can give them info but they need to know that I am handling things as best as I can. If they don't like how I handle things, they are more than welcome to handle them themselves. I would be more than happy to do that at this point. I really want to meet with a counselor.. I really need guidance in handing out responsibilities to my brothers and to make them understand that I cannot do it all. Kristi

Hi Carole, I want them to have more. I just don't know how to make them understand that I can't do it all even tho I am not working. I made the first move on getting all of us some help even it is limited as far as free counseling sessions go. Maybe they will take pity on us and offer more. I call my limited free time with friends my therapy. Kristi

My sibs truly just do not get it at all... My middle brother just gave me the argument that "I work." when I asked him to handle the disability tag while I got my ID renewed. Well if he is going to be a baby about it, I will ask a friend to help. None of my brothers really respected me when I work (used to complain about my jobs all the time) and now they really don't. Nice. I am going to ask my mom not to give my brothers any info anymore since they just want to sit back and judge. I guess going to nearly every dr's appt. and deciphering all the medical stuff and keep tracking of things here at home all day long are not enough for them. They don't see that their sister is totally overwhelmed. Well anyway I am glad that there are people on the outside that are looking in after me. There's a lot of you here and my friends and extended family members. I appreciate it! Thanks, Kristi

Hi All, We need suggestions for a team name! Let's do it! This is not just about lung cancer it is all about finding a cure for all cancers! Anyone have a great idea for a catchy name?? Kristi

I got a response from the coordinator of adult Services at Turning Point here in KC. She's going to send me some information. We are eligible for five free counseling sessions. of counseling since my dad has metatastic cancer. I can do the support for supporters since I am a primary caregiver. I told Kathy I couldn't get over to the office for a bit due to my niece's wedding this weekend and chemo for both Mom and Dad next week. Kristi

I am guessing around 8 still several months off so..... I am thinking 8 to 11 PM ET. Kristi

I think that we should form a team that encompasses a lot of the lung cancer sites. Let's put the barriers down and all fight together for this one. I will PM Katie to see if she has a problem with forming a team. Kristi

I have had it bookmarked since the day the announcement of the telethon came out. Kristi

I want to form a team... I think that we need to bring cancer research to the forefront. It will benefit us all. Kristi

I actually got some good news that will help me out a lot. My aunt and uncle are going to pay for someone to come in once every two weeks to help clean. That just lift a burden off of my shoulders. It's one less thing I have to worry about. Now it is just a matter of finding a reputable company. Kristi

Things must change around here. Kristi

Here's a resource for family caregivers: http://www.nfcacares.org National Family Caregivers Association. I received a nice packet of information from NFCA today. Kristi

I have contacted an organization here in town to see if it can help my family and I. I will let you know what happens. Kristi

Hi Gail, My heart goers out to you and Hank. Lots of good thoughts and prayers for you and Hank. Kristi

All of my siblings live locally. Two of us live here at the house. The others are within 10 minutes. Krisi

My dad is mad at me because I am going to say something to the onc today about my brother and his sore throat being in the house. Too bad! I do not want my dad to get a life-threatening infection because someone does not get it. I hope none of us get it. If I get it, I have to leave the house. I think that a family meeting with a social worker is a must at this point. Kristi

Thank you for the advice in the Issues with Siblings thread. I went out and talked to a very close friend who is like a sister to me. She basically said the same things. There's even more (That;s why the new thread.) Hi All, I had a couple of issues yesterday. First of all, there were too many family members here yesterday. One of them who feels the need to come over every weekend and the other needs a cookout every weekend. My dad does not want people over here partying. He's fed up with it. I don't blame him. My friends are sensitive to that and refuse to come in now. (I can't have friends over and can't leave the house. GESH.) My second issues is my family does not understand about the low counts. My youngest brother came over with a sore throat. I told him that he could NOT come in. My mom told him that he could not come in. I went out for a bit because I had to talk to someone. I come back in and my brother comes in uses the bathroom and sits at the computer. I was fit to be tied!! My family looked at me like "What?" Kristi

My dad is very confused. It is bordering on hallucinations. Dad has an appt. with the onc. I think that I am going to see if they can change his pain meds. He takes 60 mg of long-lasting morphoine along with 60 to 90 mg of short-acting morphine a day. Kristi

Hi All, I am starting to have issues with my brothers. It's to the point when all is said and done, I may not want anything to do with them. I really don't want it to get to that point so I need some advice. My oldest brother kind of orders me around... It's bad enough that my dad does it but I don't need it from someone who doesn't live in the household. He tells me that I have to do this and that. It's not so bad with my middle brother because he lives here too. We sometimes butt heads but we work it out in the end. My youngest brother calls and says keep me updated after he gets the update. He's very selfish and it has been noticed by people outside of the family. I had an incident with my dad last night... My dad has a lot of side effects from his treatment and his medications. It is pretty bad at this point. His worse things right now are his radiation burns in his esophagus and low counts. He is also very confused. He has an appt. with the oncologist for follow-up. I have lots of concerns to voice to the oncologist. Here's my thing: My dad went out on the deck and took a fall. He didn't bother to say anything about the dogs needing to go out... He just did it. He fell trying to put one of the dogs down at the foot of the two deck steps. He comes in and says that he thinks that he broke his arm. I get him in the bathroom and work on getting his cut taken care of since he is prone to infection right now. He's complaining because I am working too slow. I was trying to be careful so I wouldn't introduce any bacteria in his bloodstream. In the meantime, my mom is having a reaction to the Percoset she took. She has done something to a rib so it hurts her to cough. While I am tending to my dad, she calls my middle brother or he called and she asked him to call my oldest brother. I got my dad cleaned up and checked over. My two brothers came over. My oldest brother started in on me. I just started crying. He has his own health issues but he manages to work. I can't work and I need to but I can't. He and my middle brother ran to get some medical supplies for me. I don't drive so I have to depend on others to get stuff for me or take me places. About an hour or so later, my dad noticed that his ankles were swollen. I called the answering service. The on-call doctor called me back and I told him what was going on. He said check his ankle for any redness or purple from possible bruising. I saw nothing. He told me to have dad put ice on it. I told dad that and he wouldn't do it. My dad cut his arm and I put preoxide and neosporin and covered it with a bandaid right after his fall. My brothers picked up an elastic band so we could put that around Mom's ribs. That has helped her. I will see how she is in the morning. I don't think that my brothers have a clue as to what I do. I go to every single doctor appt., every test, every procedure. I arrange all the transportation. I try to manage the household as best as I can. I answer the phone the majority of the time. The house needs cleaning but I just don't have the energy to deal with that. I don't have a social life anymore and my closest friends are very angry that my family does not allow me any time for myself. I was suppose to go out with some friends but had to cancel when all the issues came up this evening. One of my friends was not happy about that at all. I don't blame her. They are very worried about my mental and physical status. When I told my middle brother about my canceled plans, his reply was simply... too humid any way. I get in trouble for spending too much time at the computer. I flat told my mom that this is my outlet. My mom does not understand my issues with my brothers at all... She's just like they are watching out for you. My parents went away for a few days last summer. One night I stepped out for a bit. My youngest brother came over to the house because he could not get ahold of me. My friends were like what is this with your family calling all the time? They were not used to that. I felt sooo embarrassed. Truth beknownst... I am totally overwhelmed at this point and my family is not recognizing it all. Kristi.... an overwhelmed caregiver