Hello, i'm Tarek, i'm from Alexandria, Egypt.. i've been reading in this forum for a while now. About a year ago, my dad had some trouble breathing and had shortness of breath, so he went to the doctors and they said it was just some water around the heart, and they would drain it..Then he went in for this and they drained the water but right after he literally couldn't breath, and said he felt as if he was drowning, they did some tests and he came back positive for Beyond stage 4 lung cancer, this all came out of nowhere!!! He was in the hospital for about 2 weeks very tired and having alot of trouble breathing and had to be on oxygen, then finally he was able to come home.. he is 62 yrs old, i am 30
We couldn't tell him he had lung cancer for the first 2 weeks, we wanted him to gain his strengh first, he is a very proud man and was already very shaken from this not being able to breath experience..we went to the doctor and they told him and he handled it pretty well, But they did not tell him he was BEYOND stage 4 *he used to smoke 3 packs a day until about 2 years ago he stopped because he had burgers disease (something from the nicotine blocking the arteries)
Then we did the bone and brain scan and they both came back as cancerous as well (doctor told me he had 3 months to live) they put him on light chemo just 5 sessions i think....he was coughing all the time at home, very bad cough that really used to kill me to hear him like this, he couldn't walk from the bedroom to the toilet without loosing his breath and running for oxygen.. he did not have trouble with brain or bones, he responded well to the light chemo and did not puke or lose hair..(he does not know about the Brain and Bones, if we told him he would JUST GIVE UP..and in Egypt really they don't tell the patient he has a limited time to live unless they ask, plus its all in God's hands anyways///
this was all last June 07" i was with him for about 2 months in Egypt then came back to the states where i am currently working, he gradually got much better and the cough went away and he was now able to get out of bed and no oxygen and go out and so on, i came back to Egypt 8 months later April 08, he looked much better but his leg was very swollen and hurting him by that time and he couldn't leave bed, but he wasn't using the oxygen and looked healthier (Cancer Doc said cancer is stable) But about 3 weeks ago he started having more bone pain, around his pelvis and back and now COUGHING BAD again, its such a horrible cough, but he does not really use oxygen like last year,(he does use a machine that you put a fluid in that he inhales and it produces oxygen as well, he uses it once a day) this seems like a dry cough with a rattling sound to it in the lungs..we went to the cancer doc and he said this has something to do with his chest and the cancer itself is stable so this is something else (maybe side effect) so we went to chest doc and did x-ray and all, *just very little water in the lungs* and he said he has bronchitis, and put him on meds, This was 3 weeks ago and he seems to be getting WORSE, the PAIN in his bone is getting very bad he can't sleep, and he can't eat much, he looks so week... They got some kind of injection that has part morphine for my dad but he took it once for the pain and he did not like it, and neither did i, he was so out of it when he took it, he will not take it again..so when we see teh doc we will ask for some kind of pain medication for his bones!
My Strong MACHO father looks like a baby now, and he is sometimes saying very strange things, and forgetting alot and gets mad easy, and i noticed he is confused when counting money or anything.. it is so strange and such a weired feeling, i didn't have the greatest relationship with my dad, he was very tough so sometimes i feel guilty because even though i'm here in Egypt with him i still do not know how to show him much affection, or to sit with him, he is in his room and i'm in the living room watching TV..its hard to explain my feeling, we went through some tough times together and OFCOURSE this is serious and i forgive and forget all the bad things, but something inside me is CONFUSED i guess..i don't know howto ACT!!! My dad is divorced and i'm his only Son so aside from my uncles and aunts coming to visit him every few days he is mostly alone I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO!! specially my Aunts live in Cairo so they can't go visit him everyday because he lives in Alexandria, they come once a week or so!
We are going back to the Cancer doc and chest doc this week, i have a bad feeling my father will not last long! i have to go back to the USA on June 5th and if something happens to him while i'm gone it will be very hard..We are Muslim and if someone dies they have to buried right away, so i would not even be there on time to attend his funeral God Frobid if something happens..Ouf..this is such a strange expreience my dad was so tough and such a MAN and now he looks so frail that just came out of nowhere...i really really feel so confused, so guilty, so strange!
Lung cancer is such a horrible illness, really...God damn this illness..i do know one thing, none of us will die missing even a Minute or second of our lives that God wrote for us..but its just horrible to see someone have to Suffer like this...
Sorry for the long entry!
Tarek