Claudibird

Mom passed away Monday March 9. I can't believe that she was just diagnosed on Jan 3 of this year. I am miserable with grief, but only for myself. I know Mom has received the ultimate healing and I am so happy for her. I thank all of you for all the advice and encouragment you have given me. This has definitely been a whirlwind crash course on lung cancer for our family, and I don't know what I would have done without this site. Thank you so much.

Saw the Dr again today, she is concerned that we may not be able to take care of mom at home much longer. Talks to mom about in patient hospice, mom begins to cry....first time since all this started. It is painful to see her cry, but I'm almost glad that she is able to release some of her fear and sadness. The Dr has offered her the possiblity of Gemzar (sp?) by itself because she thinks that is all she will be able to tolerate, as she is becoming weaker every day. mom wants to try this, she said " I just can't imagine walking away without even trying to fight." My dad and I have told her that we will stand by her and support her in any decision she makes. Right now we are trying to figure out how we can get her back home with Dad, as she has been living with me since she was discharged from the hospital. I took a leave of absence from my job as an RN in Pedatric ICU, to care for her, (she requires total assistance with eating, tranferring from wheelchair to chair, bathrrom and bathing) but my family can no longer make it without my paycheck, and I must return to work soon. I'm going to try to find someone to stay with her 8-5 a few days a week, and since I work three 12 hr shifts a week, I will drive to their town (only about 45 min away) after I take my girls to school on my days off. So, that's our latest update, I apprieciate all of you and your prayers.

Mom is worse, went back to Dr. Steroids increased to 4mg 4 x a day. Dr says Mom's condition is ominous, wouldn't reccomend chemo at this point. We were going to start her chemo Tuesday, since her last WBR is Monday. She said she wants to see if we can get her better with steroids, and re-evaluate next week. I tried to talk to Mom about what she was feeling, thoughts about dying, etc. She hasn't talked about any of this since her diagnosis....I don't know if she's trying to protect me, or just doesn't want to talk about it. All she said was "I don't think I'm doing very good". I don't know what to do, it's hard to find the right balance between being positive and hopeful around her and giving her the opportunity to express her fears or help her with anything she wants to do or say if her time is limited. All this is complicated by the fact that she isn't always lucid, and that I am devastated seeing her like this, and exhausted from taking care of her 24 hrs a day. I don't really have a question, I just needed to let some of this out. Thank you to all of you, I am so grateful I found you here.

Thank you for your advice, went to the Dr this afternoon, and he says we should definitely increase her steroids back up to 3 x a day, and wean her much more slowly. Hopefully she will return to the strength she had last week soon.

Mom had gotten so much stronger after 7 days of WBR...in and out of bed by herself, could fix herself something to eat, check her blood sugar, etc. However, on Thursday they lowered her steroids from every 6 hrs to 3 times a day, to just twice a day on Saturday. She fell on Sat, and is weaker now than when we first took her to the ER. Has no balance, can't get up and down from chair, toilet, etc. without assistance. Has difficulty even feeding herself. Did anyone have this kind of problem when weaning of their steroids, or is this something more ominous?

Oh my gosh, finding this website has been a Godsend. I so appreciate everyone's advice and encouragement. I am going to concentrate on hope instead of gloom from now on. My mom was released from the hospital this afternoon, and is going to be staying with my family and me until her Radiation TXs are complete as she and my Dad live in a small town an hour away from the cancer center. I had been staying overnight with her in the hospital, so we are both looking forward to sleeping in a real bed tonight! I have made the appt to have her teeth removed on Friday because she has told me emphatically that she wants to do the chemo. I think some of my friends and family are tired of talking about the whole cancer thing, and so I have tried to limit sharing all my feelings with some. However, I feel like I will break into a million pieces if I don't let it out, and I want to be strong for my mom. She is so afraid, I've never seen her so frail and vulnerable before. I thank all of you for letting me share my worst nightmare with you.

My 58 year old mother was diagnosed on Sat Jan 3, 2009 with NSC LC that has spread to the brain. She has 5 lesions total on her brain, with one on her brain stem. She has many neurological symptoms, as would be expected. She started steroids, and has received 2 of her scheduled 14 whole brain radiation txs. The steroids have helped with her confusion and headaches, and I am hopeful that the radiation will also. The Dr doesn't want to give us any type of time frame, and I guess that she really can't, although everything I've read appears to indicate months. Mom wants to have chemo as soon as the radiation is done, but I don't think she truly understands that this will not "cure" her. On top of that she has a pre-existing condition of several bad teeth (10) which the oncologist said should be removed prior to chemo. I'm not really sure what my question is, because my heart is so heavy with misery right now, that it is difficult to think straight. I guess I want to know other people's experiences and if they thought the chemo was a good decision for their loved ones and if it decreased their quality of life even though it extended it. If she has only a few months, should she be dealing with the pain of dental surgery, poss nausea/vomiting etc. or just be eating Snickers, and drinking Dr Peppers which she loves? I don't want to take hope away from her, but I can't bear the thought of her suffering any more than she already is.