stand4hope

"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he steps out of the shower. "Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?" "Probably that I married you for your money," she replied. _______________________________________________________ The ladies get these points, too! Peggy

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his seatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?" "It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?" He yelled back, "University of North Carolina." And they say blondes are dumb... ______________________________________________________ The ladies will take the points - thank you very much! Peggy

Joni, I can't imagine what you're going through. I'm so sorry. It sounds like you are doing a really good job and making the best of a sad situation. I'm sending a big hug for you and Alex. (((((((((((((((JONI AND ALEX)))))))))))))))))) Love, Peggy

Tracy, My husband has been on Iressa since June. He had stable scans in July and September. His side effects are ditto TAnn's. A little rash and occasional diarrhea, but it's all tolerable. He just takes the Iressa pill once a day and it's easy as eating pie! He also feels great and is working full time. I will pray that the Iressa works well for your dad, too! Love, Peggy

MJ, I am so very sorry for this great loss. I pray that God will hold you and your family very close during the days ahead. Love, Peggy

MJ, At my dad's funeral, our pastor talked about how everybody grieves differently, and there is no right or wrong way to grieve. He said some cry, some don't, some talk about it and some don't, some come to the funeral and some don't, some laugh and tell jokes and some think it's terrible to smile at a funeral. I can't remember everything he said, but he got the point across that everybody's way of grieving is ok, no matter how they grieve. I also think it's different depending on the person that we have lost. I really was ok when my mom passed, but my sisters were more like your brother. My mom was expected to die about 20 years earlier than she did and was very sick for a very, very long time. To me, her passing was overdue and it was time for her poor frail body to give up. She asked Jesus to forgive her and save her about 1 week before she died (she was in the hospital), and the peace she experienced after that was comforting. Now, when my dad died, it was a flip-flop. I had a much harder time, as did my brother, but the sister who had the hardest time with our mom did ok. I didn't feel like my dad's time should be over yet. He was so full of life and love and expecting so many things to happen for him. One silly thing was that he was so excited to pay off his credit card. My mom gambled a lot, and they had a credit card over $10,000 when she died. It took him 5 years (because he had some emergencies he had to add to it), but he got it down to less then $3,500, was paying off $400 a month, and could hardly wait to see it hit zero. He never got to see that happen. I was his caregiver (he had severe COPD), and I have had a much harder time with him being gone. I miss him terribly. In any case, you are ok just like you are. Whatever comes natural for you, is what is right for you. I am so sorry for you loss. Love, Peggy

Rats! Rats! Rats! Well, until you come up with a solution, Fay, I agree with Snowflake - food can be good therapy. I've had some stress this week and last night ate a bowl of ice cream with chocolate syrup, a huge burrito today for lunch, w/two scoops of sour cream, and three of those small Hershey's chocolates - and I'm supposed to be the leader of The Getting Smaller Club! Ha! Not yesterday and today. The food therapy works until you have to get on the scales. Sigh - better get back to it tomorrow! You hang in there, girlfriend. I love your spunk! Love, Peggy

CARLEEN! How wonderful to hear from you! As the others have said, we have all been worried about you and Keith. I was thrilled to see your name up there tonight. You obviously have a full plate, and I know what that's like. Somehow we just find a way to get through it, though, don't we? Like the others, the thing to do is to slow down and take a break, but I know you won't do it. When my dad was so sick, I got the same advice from everyone I know, but it's just not something that we are willing to do when there are so many pressing things going on. And, yes, it does wear you down almost to a breaking point, but God will see you through all this. It saddens me to hear that Keith has had so much nausea. Out of every sicky thing I've ever had, including surgeries and pain, the thing I hate the most is being sick to my stomach. That is the pits. The suppository suggestion above sounded like it might be a good solution to look into. Carleen, hang in there, honey! I'm glad we know we can send you emails, so it won't be so long between getting updates. All my love and prayers to you both, Peggy

Hi kdaru! Boy, my heart just sinks reading about the hard time you are having with your parents. I read your profile, and (hoping no one will be offended with this) I'm wondering if a lot of this confusion and being overwhelmed can be blamed on their age. At age 82, most people are pretty set in their ways, have a routine nailed down and almost never deviate from it. To have all of this thrown at them all of a sudden must be terribly overwhelming to them. Now, after making that statement above, I know that doesn't really help with your stress level and the things you are having to deal with. Unfortunately, I don't know that I have a solution for you because I just know that dealing with the elderly can be very, very frustrating and takes a lot of patience. I think you would lean more toward the safe side if you pretty much assumed that they just aren't "getting it." That being said, either you or someone else in the family probably just needs to be assertive and step in try to take over with a lot of hand-holding. That person needs to insist on going to the doctor appointments, OR get them to sign a HIPPA authorization so they can get get information directly from the doctors and find out what he needs to do. He probably needs to be told just one or two steps at a time so that he isn't so overwhelmed. As far as his temperment, unless you can get the doctor to talk to him about it and prescribe something, I would guess that it will probably be like this through the duration of his treatment. Unfortunately, most of the time spoken words alone just don't change the behavior of the elderly. They are independent and dig in their heels and are just going to act the way they want to act. Maybe medication would help to calm him, but since he's resistant to you about this, the doctor probably needs to talk him into taking something. I know I am a little out of my league here, but I have spent a lot of time in nursing homes and I have a very special spot in my heart for the elderly. I'm drawn to them like a magnet to steel. I just felt very compelled to try to help you get inside your mom and dad's heads to maybe understand their fears and confusion. It really does take a lot of patience. Take lots of deep breaths, relax your shoulders when you feel like you are going to blow, close your eyes, and simply say, "God, please help me", and then say "Thank you." That's the best you can do. Please let us know how things go. Love and prayers, Peggy

Caledon, I am sorry to hear about the loss of your mom. It really hurts when we lose our parents. I think that even though we know they probably won't always be here, I don't think we really expect to lose them, and when we do, it really hurts. Please relay my heartfelt sympathy to the rest of your family. You take care of yourself, and please stay in touch with us. Love, Peggy

Dear Beth, You are in my prayers. You have had enough stress in the last couple of months to last you a lifetime. I hope you get some answers very soon. Enough is enough. Sounds like you are in the right place to get everything taken care of immediately. Keep us posted, please. Love, Peggy

Andrea, I'm sure the pulmonologist will be able to help your mom. My dad had COPD for many years, and his pulmonologist really did a LOT to help him with his breathing for a very, very long time. I don't know about the weakness (lifting things), but I would think if her breathing improves then she will feel more like working on re-building her strength. Praying for you, hon. Send me a PM if you want to talk. Love, Peggy

To Paddy, Karen and the rest of your family: I am so, so sorry. The tribute to David was so beautiful. The tears are on my cheeks. I doubt there will be many dry eyes in our LCSC after reading this. All to my to you and may God bless you with love. Peggy

Cindi, I just loved your post here. We all need these type of reminders. You are a wonderful person and a blessing to us all. And Ginny, I equally loved your post. You are a gift to us from God. Love, Peggy

Vent away, Mary! I know exactly how you feel. Since I turned 50, it's been one thing after another. I had almost no visits to my doctor(s) before age 50, and now it's always something! Currently, I have had quite severe heel pain on both feet. I thought maybe I hurt them on my new stepper, but the podiatrist this week said it's plantar faciitis, so now I'm having to do exercises to stretch my hamstrings and calf muscles. I've had this before, but it was in the arch of one foot. The first few steps in the morning are excruciating, but improves a little after stretching. I've had so many crappy little things like this come up in the last five years that I am truly embarrassed to tell anybody if I can avoid it. I even had gout a couple of months ago! Geesh! So, anyway, your vents allowed me to vent, too. Vent away! Love you, too! Peggy

Elaine, Well, at least it sounds like you are making some progress and have somebody listening and scans scheduled. I'm glad to hear that! I'm also glad to hear that skinny butt is DOING something and that you got meds to help you through all this. I have a skinny ortho doctor (male). I mean he is Barney Fife skinny, minus 20 lbs. I'm so glad to see this update. Keep in touch! Love, Peggy

Elaine, Prayers coming for a successful morning with your doctors and a successful outcome with your husband's job. Good luck, my friend!! Love, Peggy

Thanks for the update, Jen. You've had it pretty rough. I just bet those scans are going to come back clean, clean, clean. I also hope that something can be done for your cough very soon. Hang in there, girl. We are all here to give you as much support as you need. Love, Peggy

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you for all your well wishes. HE MADE IT!!! Approx. 22 hours total driving time, and he arrived in Chandler, Arizona (a little southeast of Phoenix) a few hours ago. The truck held up, he held up and the weather held up. Connie: I hope he doesn't have that problem - I'm sure as heck not going to fly him 1800 miles home to POOP! LOLOL! I shared in a PM last night that I'm completely over being sad. The bathroom and kitchen have been clean when I go to bed at night and are still clean in the morning, and still clean even when I get home from work. Yeeha!!!! I love it!! He had three experiences that he just loved: First, he saw a sign that cautioned about dust storms the next ____ miles. He thought that was hilarious and said to me, "You sure don't see those in Indiana." The second thing, and he was exuberant about this one. He said, "I just passed a sign that said "Caution - Elk Crossing next 68 miles." He yelled - "ELK!!! Can you imagine - ELK! I think my truck would lose to an Elk." All the time, I know he was hoping and praying he would see an Elk. LOL! The last one was today. He was about 10 miles south of Phoenix and was on the phone with me and said, "Oh my God! I just saw a mountain lion!" He was awestruck with the scenery in New Mexico and Flagstaff. Thanks again for all your nice (and funny comments). I'm really doing great, and am in fact excited like a little kid for him. Love to all, Peggy

Andrea, Congratulations to your mom, to you, to your dad and to your whole family! Hitting that one-year mark sure feels good, doesn't it? Love, Peggy

Hi Cindi, I'm a little late here with the anniversary congratulations, but . . . . HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!!!!!!! and may you have many, many, many more to celebrate! Love, Peggy

Hi Craneman and WELCOME! I saw this thread earlier and thought I said hello to you, but guess I didn't, so sorry for the delay. Keep your chin up, hold your head up high, take lots of deep breaths, and just KNOW that you can get through this. Read and re-read all the posts above this one from people with a similar diagnosis to yours. My husband is Stage IV with lots of distant metastises in more places that I even want to tell you about, but he feels good, is working every day, and we're even back to getting into our old arguments like we did before diagnosis! LOL! There is lots and lots of hope. Welcome to LCSC and God bless you! Peggy

LOLOLOL!! I'm sold. I am going to get a facial! Wish I would have seen this when our son left for Arizona! LOL! Gail, Don't forget to buy the BIG jar of Mayonnaise!! Congratulations on the good news!! Love, Peggy [/b]

Well, shoot! Cindi used the "attitude of gratitude" that I was going to use. Anyway, I ditto her comment. Your post was refreshing to say the very least. I think we need constant reminders of what we should be grateful for, including living in this wonderful country where we actually have "health care" - so many others do not! It sounds as though you have been blessed this past year, several times over. Our God is an awesome God! Donna, thanks for sharing your uplifting story!! Love, Peggy

Hi Leah, and welcome to LCSC. I am so very, very sorry that you lost your wonderful mom to this awful disease. You expressed your love for her in a magnificent way. I know it hurts - I just lost my dad in June, and my mom almost 6 years ago. The hurt will become less painful, but only with time. Your profound grief has been felt in my heart. I am so sorry. Love, Peggy