LaDonna

Hi everyone! It has been a while since I've had a chance to get on here. Been completely swamped at work! Our Eastern Star Chapter had its 100th Anniversary celebration a couple weeks ago and I was busy with that. On top of everything else somehow the crazy idea that I would make a good Girl Scout Troop Leader came into being! Now I'm the troop leader for the Daisies there in Maypearl. We're having a blast, but it is a lot more work than I thought it would be... Meeting a lot of great people though and Elizabeth is making some pretty good little friends! My daughter starting kinder and us starting the Girl Scouts has been kind of hard. Had quite a few moments where I have thought, "I'll call Mom and ask her." Good thing is I'm staying busy and I've made some friends that have potential of being good friends! That has really helped get through some of this stuff. Looking forward to the holidays and dreading them all at the same time. Know it is going to be really hard on my dad, but I think he's going to come visit us on Christmas which will be good for him. Looking forward to seeing some of you at the walk next week in DFW! My dad, his cousin and her daughter are coming up to walk with us. Going to be a very busy weekend! We have the walk that morning. My husband has a Masonic event that afternoon. Then that evening we're having the Investiture Ceremony for the Daisies! One of these days I might actually get to slow down... Hope everyone is doing well! Enjoy the cooler weather! LaDonna

Thought I would stop in and say hi! I've been dealing with production problems all week this week at work! Judy loved the jokes! KW Judy - hope you get to feeling better. Headed down to see Dad this weekend. Everyone have a good weekend! LaDonna

Bud - can agree with you on wanting to stay close to home. Cost to much to drag the boat very far! We live in Venus so we usually go to Bardwell, Waxahachie (which is to low right now), Joe Pool, or Cleburne. Judy - been thinking about you today. I hope this week goes well for you and you get some good news! Today is my mom's birthday. Talked to my dad last night and asked him to take her a flower from me today since we can't make the drive down there... She would have been 55 today. Way to young to be gone already! I think I have talked Jimmy into taking me back to see Harry Potter in 3D in the DBox seats tonight. They're the seats that move and stuff with the movie. A friend is keeping the kids so we are going to have a date night. Haven't had one of those in a while. Going to go visit Dad this weekend. Haven't been back down there, been trying to give him some space, but want to go check on him... I'm sure you know how that is. Other than that I don't have anything this week in the evenings! That is a record for me. I usually have at least one night a week that I have somewhere I have to be. It is good though because I need the break. Have some stuff I have to get done for next week though so I'll work on that tomorrow or Thursday.... Hope everyone has a good day!

Bud - We got out on Lake Bardwell for a little while yesterday and I caught a couple of catfish. None big enough to keep... Of course like everything else here lately we had some problems with the boat, so Jimmy's going to have to work on that now... Made it to see Harry Potter on Saturday morning! It is probably the best movie of the series. Book is still better, but I thought they did a great job with it. The special effects were awesome! Took a couple of naps this weekend and spent time doing stuff with the kids. Still trying to recover from the last couple of weeks. Elizabeth wants to join Girl Scouts this year and I get her a couple of t-shirts and me a button up while they were on sale. Of course one of the first things I thought when they came is was, "I need to call Mom and let her know." Then it hit. I guess that is going to happen for a while... Getting back in the swing of things this week. Drug myself to the gym and did a hard workout. Got my body bug back on and starting my calorie counting again... Got about 10 lbs now that I have to work back off, just to get back to where I was! Work is back to the normal stress level, which is way high. It seems like we never slow down! Hope everyone has a good week! LaDonna

Happy Friday Everyone! Having a tough day... Got what I really needed to get done at work today, but just can't concentrate on anything today. I'm just tired... Haven't slept good the last couple of nights which doesn't help, but have made myself get up and go to the gym in the mornings. Talked to Dad last night. I could tell he was trying to sound ok for me but was pretty sad... Sounds like quite a few have some good weekend plans. We hope to get out on the lake in the boat this weekend. We haven't had a chance all summer to take it out. Probably won't be out long because it gets so hot, but hope to at least get out in the morning... Sunday we're going to see Harry Potter!! YEAH!!! Can't wait! I have been looking forward to this one for so long. Hope everyone has a good weekend. I'm going to get me a cup of coffee and have a brownie that Jimmy made. So much for the 45 minutes on the treadmill this morning....

Made it through my first day back at work and my line officer's meeting yesterday. Didn't get a whole lot done because everyone wanted to come by and chat all day... Read everyone's posts yesterday. Thanks for all the words of encouragement. It means a lot to hear from people that have gone through the same thing! My dad emailed me yesterday and said that my office had sent him a cheese cake from Oregon! Said the ice packs were melted so he popped it in the freezer in hopes that it hadn't gone bad... Said he is doing good. Got back on the motorcycle yesterday. We don't have anything planned this evening other than maybe taking the kids to see The Zookeeper. Looks like it should be funny. So far we don't have anything planned this weekend other than going to see Harry Potter! I love the books and all the movies. Have been waiting for this one to come out. My mom was hooked on them too and we went and saw 5 and 6 together. She wasn't able to go see 7 at the theater with me, but we watched it on TV. She was really looking forward to seeing the last movie... Bud - have to say you are doing better than we are! The heat is just a little to much for us. It would probably help if we had some trees around the house to give us some shade. Did make it back to the gym this morning though. Feel a little better! Jimmy, my husband, loves the sci-fi stuff too. Katy - Congrats on you anniversary! We will hit 13 in a couple of weeks. Hard to believe how fast time can fly. Guess I better actually try and get some work done today! Have a great day.

Well - it is my first day back at work today. Have to say I haven't gotten a whole lot done today. After everything that has happened and just being out for 2.5 weeks a lot of people have been coming by. Several were surprised I was already back, but I really couldn't miss much more work. We've had a lot of sickness this year with us and the kids as well, so I missed quite a bit the first part of the year as well... I'm hanging in there pretty well. As long as I stay busy I'm pretty good. The hardest part is going to be on my drives home, because I used to call and talk to Mom once or twice a week the whole way home. She's always been my sounding board about everything... That was an adjustment that I have slowly made over the last couple of months though because she was getting to where she couldn't really concentrate to talk on the phone that long anyways... At times, I feel bad because people can't believe how well I am doing and that makes me feel a little guilty. But we spent all week last week, and realistically the last 6 weeks, preparing for what was going to happen and went through a large part of the grieving process then. It still hits me at times, and I know that will continue to happen, but I'm tired of crying! Is that bad? Bud - I just don't know how you ride your bike in the heat around here. The morning I can understand, but do you ride home in the evening too? I'm looking forward to getting back in the gym now that everything is calming down. I had been doing so well and was down just over 50 lbs until a few weeks ago... put a few back on with everything that is going on. Hopefully it won't take me long to turn it back around! Judy - I recommend Google Chrome browser! I really like it, but there are a few things that don't work just right in it... It is much more light weight on your system though... Hope y'all have a good day! I'm back to normal routine today. Going to line officers tonight for Easter Star. Can't wait to find out how the roundup went over the weekend. LaDonna

Good evening everyone! Well everything went well with my mom's visitation and service. The hardest part was telling our kids that Momo was gone, but they are doing ok. My dad is doing ok. I think he was ready for some time by himself... My brother is headed toward the east coast. He was living in CA before he came in last week and is moving to NC now... That just how he does stuff... Well we have had a great time since we got home. We had a water leak out front, the tire on the car was flat and the router is down... Welcome Home! I have to say that I have found a wonderful group of friends the last couple of years. My Eastern Star sisters really stepped up to help me out last week. My first meeting as Worthy Matron was last week and we had a major event that I was suppose to be Master of Ceremonies at Saturday. I had one of my ladies drive in from NM to put together centerpieces for the banquet and get them to the the others that were working on the weekend. I had one couple drive the four hours down there to my mom's visitation just so they could be there for us. Then the lady we were having the banquet for on Sat came to the graveside service on Monday. That is a wonderful group of people and I don't know what I would do without them. I'm going to try and get on here a little more and get to know people. I know we have a long road ahead, and will never get over loosing Mom, but having such a great family and friend support system around. LaDonna

Linda Ann Fillingim, beloved wife of Ronnie Fillingim passed away July 9, 2011 at her home in Livingston, TX surrounded by her family. She was born July 19, 1956 in Albuquerque, NM to Lloyd and Mary Ann Eaker. Preceeded in death by her father Lloyd Eaker. Survived by husband of 34 years, Ronnie Lee Fillingim Sr. Daughter, LaDonna Stephens and husband Jimmy and their children George and Elizabeth of Venus, TX. Son, Ronnie Lee Fillingim, Jr. of Santa Clara, CA. Extended family, father and mother-in-law, George and Charlotte Fillingim of Livingston, TX. Brother-in-law, Mike Fillingim and wife Kathleen of Humble, TX. Their children, Kelly Fillingim of Dallas, TX, and Seth Fillingim of Houston, TX. Sister-in-law, Kimberly Dunn and husband of Melvin of Lago Vista, TX. Their children Ashleigh and Whitney Glover of Katy, TX. Mother, Mary Ann, brothers, Lloyd and Tommy and their families. Visitation at Cochran Funeral Home, Sunday July 10, 2011 from 5:00 to 8:00 PM, 406 Youpon Ave, Livingston, TX. Graveside Services, Monday, July 11, 2011 at 10:00 AM with Reverend Ernest Brown officiating, at Old Hardin Cemetery, Kountze, TX. In lieu of flowers, the family would suggest donations to the Lungevity Foundation. You can donate to the family’s team: http://events.lungevity.org/goto/ls_lindas_light.

Good evening everyone! I just wanted to again say thanks for all the replies I got on my intro and let you know that we made it through our vacation. It was great! Rented a house in Rockport, TX and just hung out, fished, and went swimming. A week of nothing to worry about and just enjoying time with my husband and kids. Dropped the kids off at my in-laws this afternoon where they will stay for the next week and came by to see my parents this evening and tomorrow. A great week of oblivion and now reality has come crashing back in on all sides! Over the last week, my mom has gone downhill very quickly. She hasn't eaten anything the last two days, hardly drinks anything, and hasn't been able to get out of bed since Monday... The doctor said that they think we only have a couple of weeks, but my dad feels like it will be soon than that. It is really hard to see her like this, but my dad is the one that I'm really worried about. He's taking off work to stay home and is here 24/7 taking care of her. We live 4 hours away and have to go home tomorrow so I can go back to work on Tuesday, so we can't really help. My grandparents have been coming over and helping so that my dad can get out of the house for a little while, but it is hard. My brother is going to try and fly in on Tuesday, but he's said that before so we'll see... Unfortunately I have a huge event that I'm taking part in next weekend, so unless something happens we won't be able to come down next weekend. I'm head of a group organizing a weekend long convention and will be Master of Ceremonies at the banquet on Saturday night. I have to get up and talk in front of nearly 200 people! This is a big deal for me, because just a few years ago I wouldn't even leave Jimmy's side when we went somewhere because I was so shy. It is amazing how we can change if we find something to start that swing! Well I guess I better get to bed... Up late last night getting everything ready to come home and then couldn't go to sleep thinking about everything I had to do after I got home... Hope everyone has a wonderful 4th of July! LaDonna

Thank you everyone for the support! Bud, I don't think I actually got to talk to you last year, but I did get to hear you talk. Your story was so encouraging and I told my mom about it when we got home that afternoon. She thought it was great how quick you got back on the bike! Judy, thanks for the advice. They actually had Hospice start last week and they have been coming out everyday to help do things like baths and stuff. My dad had to go back to work, he works 7/7 offshore, in order to save his last week of vacation so my mom is at my grandparents this week. My grandma is good at keeping me updated on how things are going and we email everyday. Judy/Annette - we're going down to the Texas coast by Corpus. The kids have been wanting to go back to the beach since we went a couple years ago. They are 5 and 6, so they know what is going on, but you have to wonder how well they understand. I was upset the other night, after we found out that it had spread, and my little girl was so sweet. My husband had explained to them that Momo was sick again and that she wasn't doing very well. She came up to me and said, "Mommy I know why you are sad. Momo is going to die. It is ok, these things happen, but it will be ok. Sometimes you have to explain stuff to us, but sometimes kids have to explain it to you." She said it all so matter of factly! If was amazing, sweating, and comforting. George, my son, is really close to my mom. We're a little worried about how he is going to handle this. I think he'll be ok, but it is going to be harder on him then Elizabeth. I think going on vacation is going to be good for them. With everything we have had going on we haven't had a lot of quality time with them. Thanks again everyone for their support! I really appreciate it! LaDonna

Hello everyone! It has been a rough nine months for my family. My mom, who’ll be 55 in July, had been having headaches last summer and in August all the sudden had some major problems with her vision. She went to the eye dr and they told her they were concerned she had recently suffered a stroke and sent her to her family dr. He ordered an MRI for the next morning which they went and got done. About an hour after they got home the dr called and said they needed to be in the officer an hour later. Knew something bad was going on then, because you know how dr's never rush! They got there and the dr told them my mom had a brain tumor. Found a wonderful neurosurgeon in Lufkin, TX that got her in immediately to see him. Scheduled surgery the next week. At this point they had no reason to suspect cancer because of how the tumor was shaped. After the surgery the dr came out and told us that the tumor was cancerous, but was not a brain cancer. They knew from preliminary tests that it was squamous cell, most likely from lung or esophagus. That started us on the long journey of trying to find the primary and determine treatments. They never were able to locate the primary tumor, but did find several lymph nodes in her chest that had been effected as well. They did two weeks of full brain radiation after the surgery and then started on radiation for her chest and chemo. Everything finished up in Jan and the CT scan in Feb showed that the tumors in her chest had drastically decreased in size. They were in a holding pattern until May when they would do another set of scans to make sure things were either still shrinking or at least nothing new had appeared. Things haven’t gone quite a planned though. In April she started hurting really bad in her lower back and hips. When she started losing feeling the oncologist said she needed to come in for an MRI right away. The found that the cancer had spread and there is now a cluster of tumors on the base of her spine where the nerves branch out. They did two weeks of radiation for the pain, which did help some. After discussing options with the dr’s my parents have decided not to do any further treatments. The only really options have an extremely low success rate, are painful, and she’s just not up to it. She can still get around with a walker but is in a wheelchair most of the time. She hardly eats anything and her pain is getting worse again. They have called in Hospice and they are coming out and helping with her care every day. The one good thing about all this is my mom’s attitude. She has stayed positive and upbeat through all of this. Now she knows the end is getting closer and she has told us that she is ready. My dad asked her about going and making funeral arrangements and she just took over! She is making all the decisions and getting everything set up exactly how she wants it. My dad is struggling with this. He’s trying to stay strong for her and me, but he’s exhausted. My grandparents, on my dad’s side, live right there and have been helping with driving to treatments and taking care of her. We live about 3.5 hours away from my parents and have been making the trip every weekend. We have vacation planned the week of the 25th, which I feel guilty about going on, but we have two small children as well that need our attention. To top that off we are involved in Eastern Star (which has been a wonderful support system!) and were just installed as Worthy Matron and Worthy Patron, our son is a Cub Scout and my husband is Den Leader, my daughter starts kindergarten this year and wants to be a Daisy, and so on! Needless to say we are completely over tasked, stressed, exhausted, and trying to be everywhere at one time… We’ll make it through because we don’t have a choice, but the next couple of months are going to be extremely hard on all of us. Sorry this ended up so long! I don’t really have anyone to talk to about this and it feels good to get some of it off my chest. I’m looking forward to the walk in DFW again in November. It was nice to get to meet some other people and this time I’m hoping to get to talk to some more. Thanks, LaDonna