Jump to content

Suzie Q

Members
  • Posts

    638
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by Suzie Q

  1. Suzie Q

    John

    Sending my deepest condolences. I have no other words to comfort you. Just know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Karen
  2. Whew! What a lot to deal with! First off, find out from your mom's onc whether he is placing her on a chemo "vacation." Sounds like her blood cell counts are so low that he wants to give her body time to recover. These little vacations are often good, although I would much prefer to be on a beach, sipping a nice tropical drink... Second, see if you can lay out a plan for your mom as to who can help with what. Can you delegate some phone calls to a friend or relative? Just having someone else take care of it will help her so much! Contact a social worker at the hospital your mom has been using. They should be able to help you navigate the support network and get your mom some help with her bills, etc. Perhaps she qualifies for disability Medicare or even Medicaid? Third, gather up a team of family and friends to clean out the rental unit. As to the idiot doctor, if anything like that ever happens again, stop the person from speaking further and ask, "Excuse me, but did anyone ASK for this information? She chooses to not focus on that. Please respect her wishes." And I would file a letter of complaint to the Chief of Staff at the hospital. This doctor knows better than to behave like that! Unfortunately, we are indeed surrounded by the compassionate-challenged morons! Keep your chin up! You are doing great! ~Karen
  3. Boy, this is the 64 million dollar question! Each patient has to weigh the benefits of forgoing treatment vs medically treating the cancer. Yes, there are side effects. And each new line of chemo carries a different set of side effects, so really, one could re-evaluate it on an ongoing basis. If a chemo is intolerable, it can often be given at a lesser strength, in the hopes of receiving enough to kill the circulating cancer cells as well as the primary tumor, yet be less toxic than the full dose. Or it can be changed to another regimen altogether. And the radiation-chemo combination can really kick a person on their fanny! But it IS your mom's decision to make. You need an outlet for your anger. Yes, your mom's smoking may have contributed to the disease, and she may have not-so-healthy habits, but you do not KNOW that this was self-inflicted. Regardless, it is beside the point. The priority now is to help her any way you can. Pointing a finger of blame is not helpful. Telling her that you do not know why this has happened to her and that the cause is irrelevant now IS helpful. Helping her cut her hair must have been traumatic for both of you. My dad was mostly bald, and my mom compared her ahaved head with his for a picture! It helped my mom to make light of it! She also shopped for a wig before she lost her hair. I think it helped the transition a bit. But scarves and hats are an option, too. They even make hats with velcro strips inside and you can buy hair bangs and hair sides and back attachments so you do not have to wear a hot wig all the time. Best wishes to you, Karen
  4. A pain patch like Fentanyl might help. However, some people may have hallucinations with it (both of my parents had this side effect). I might even give thought to alternative treatment, like accupuncture, biofeedback, or hypnosis. Sometimes they do work! ~Karen
  5. Is he keeping his fluid intake up? If not, perhaps he's dehydrated. Do call his onc(yes, even on Sunday) and see if your dad needs to go in to get IV fluids. ~Karen
  6. So sorry you will not get that call. Best wishes on your birthday and for the year ahead. Karen
  7. So sorry for your loss, Bobby. Karen
  8. Deepest sympathies. ~Karen
  9. So sorry to receive this news. Much peace and comfort to you. Karen
  10. Suzie Q

    Next steps

    Hugging you right back, Teri. ~Karen
  11. Suzie Q

    Baby names

    What was your dad's name? If you don't want to use his name, you could use a variation of it or another language's version of it.
  12. She really needs to stay on her pain meds, even if she feels ok. It is much harder to get control of a mountain of pain. And sometimes good, old ibuprofen can actually manage the pain if it is taken properly and at the regular intervals recommended by her doctor. ~Karen
  13. Deepest sympathies, Karen
  14. I will miss your jokes, larry. Best wishes to you always.
  15. Suzie Q

    My Latest PET/CT

    Time for a happy dance!
  16. Christine, You DID give him the best chance to fight this, and he gave it everything he had. But it was not in your control, or your dad's control. So hard to accept this, as we all would like to believe that we can actually save someone...it just doesn't always work that way. Please accept my deepest sympathies. hugs, Karen
  17. So sad to hear you have to deal with the added stress. Just keep doing what you and your Dad agree on...sounds like you have things in hand. Your mom's comfort is obviously your priority; I can see that. Hugs, Karen
  18. I think that the second year is harder, in some ways. For me, it's guilt that is added to the grief. Guilt for seemingly moving on with life; guilt for not thinking about my parents frequently enough; guilt for the relief of selling their condo and knowing that THAT one big thing was over and done with... I know that this is not logical. Yet, I feel it just the same. I don't know, Lori. Maybe a counselor can help. But what you describe sounds not too different from where I was not so long ago. Hugs, Karen
  19. Oh, please don't let us frighten you! The intent (if I may be so bold to make the assumption from all the previous posts) is to let you know that you often have to be firm with your caregiver. They sometimes brush off symptoms of younger, healthier patients that they would definitely follow up on in an older, less healthy individual. And that's because the odds are in YOUR FAVOR that this is not cancer! And I say that as a 41-year-old basically healthy female who has been humored TWICE in the last 3 years to have a chest x-ray for a persistent cough. I even got a work up with a pulmonary specialist for suspected COPD on a Chest xray. All benign results. Focus on the odds being in your favor, but get the xray anyway, for your peace of mind. ~Karen
  20. Theresa, we ALL are at risk for some disease or another, simply by virtue of the fact that we are alive! We eat grilled meats, fatty foods, don't get enough exercise, smoke, drink, work in hazardous environments, you name it! But A + B does not always add up to C. It's all so complicated, and multiple factors come into play...but keep in mind that even some of those who live ideal "healthy" lifestyles can drop dead of a heart attack or stroke with little or no warning. Bottom line, you do what you can to reduce your risk. Do NOT let the stress of your anxiety become an additional risk factor! That said, I do sympathize with your thoughts. Whenever I have a lingering cough, I start to wonder... Do try to live in the here and now. Enjoy every minute you have at this moment. ~Karen
  21. Sorry to hear your dear father is having a rough go of it right now. Take Katie's advice to heart - she has written it so well. Here's to hoping that the next round will be the cancer bomb and fry as much of the beast as possible! ~Karen
  22. Deepest condolences. What a lovely way to honor your dear husband. Karen
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.