Shelleym

My mom was diagnosed with extensive SCLC a little over a year ago. She was very passive person and also had bouts of severe depression, and my fears about her reaction to her diagnosis were similar to yours. After all, she didn't even want to go to the hospital even though she could barely breathe. But she surprised us all and decided that she wanted aggressive treatment. I don't know what your mom knows about her treatment, but has she spoken with a social worker from the hospital? The social workers affiliated with the hospital where my mom was treated were invaluable to all of us. And the one who saw my mom regularly is the one who discussed her diagnosis -- and her prognosis -- with her. Only you can determine whether your mother is strong enough to tell her the details of her diagnosis. But keep in mind that she might be stronger than you think. I never in a million years thought my mom would choose treatment after her diagnosis. She hadn't been to a doctor in about 30 years, and everyone was convinced that she would simply choose hospice care rather than invasive medical treatment. Just goes to show how people can surprise you when they're staring death in the face. You and your mother will be in my thoughts.

I just wanted to let you know that my mom lost her battle against small cell lung cancer yesterday. You probably remember that I posted here after she was diagnosed, and I want to thank you all for your kind words of support. I haven't posted much but I lurked A LOT -- and your presence here and your words of wisdom and hope helped me get through the past two months. Blessings and good wishes to you all.

Hi Paddy, my youngest son (he's 11 now) was an outpatient at City of Hope when he was a toddler for ITP (immune thrombocytopenic purpura.) It was, by far, the best medical care I have ever experienced in my life. I think City of Hope is wonderful, and would recommend it to anyone who is considering treatment there. I only wish my mom was there instead of 260 miles away.

(((Hugs))) to you Nancy. I'm praying for a clean scan.

Condolences on the loss of your beloved husband, Lois. My mom was diagnosed with SCLC in July and I, too, am wrestling with decisions now and it's positively gut-wrenching.

That's what I don't get about the Medicaid -- my mom has no assets. She rents an apartment, doesn't own a car, no 401(k)/retirement -- nada. All that's in her bank account is about enough to pay rent and some other bills, and that's it. As for FMLA, well, I'm self-employed. I work on contract and I'm paid for the hours I work; I can take as much time off as I want, but then I won't have any money! Thanks for your kind thoughts!

Thank you all for your kind welcome! To answer some questions, I am, indeed, an only child. My mom moved out of state 32 years ago, so she does have many friends up there -- she just hates to ask anyone for help. (I don't -- next time I go see her I'm looking for her address book and I'm going to start callling people, because I know she won't.) Thankfully, she does have one very good friend who has been very helpful to her lately, and for that I am very grateful. I simply cannot be there all the time, as I have a family and a job here in Southern California. (Nancy B, we're almost neighbors! I live in San Gabriel and work in Pasadena.) Every time I suggest to my mom that perhaps she should relocate down here so that I can be more involved in her care, she freaks out. As for Medicare, it's my understanding that Medicaid will only pay for her 'premium' to upgrade her Medicare from part A to part B. It's better than nothing, but I still find it unbelievable that someone whose income is limited to Social Security somehow 'earns' too much to qualify for Medicaid! My biggest frustration right now is making sure that she arranges for her treatment. She is focusing on relocating from an upstairs to a downstairs apartment, but it is imperative that she start chemo right away -- at least that's what I've been told about sclc. Anyway, thank you all. I've got lots of reading to do here!

Hi all. My mother was diagnosed with small cell lung cancer last week and I am truly in need of support! Her oncologist wants to start her on chemotherapy right away, but she wants to do it on an outpatient basis. The chemo schedule is 3x/week every 3 weeks over 18 weeks total. She lives by herself, but I don't know how much longer she will be able to do that. Oh, and she lives in another state with no relatives nearby. HELP! I want to help my mom, but at this point I just don't know what to do. She is 69, has smoked more than 50 years (but quit during her hospital stay, thank goodness), and her only insurance is Medicare. Today her case worker notified me that she is ineligible for Medicaid, so now I don't know what we're going to do about her treatment and living arrangements.