Its been a while since I have been able to read on here cause I have been at the hospital with my husband.
As I told you before, he had NSCLS. I had hoped we would make it to our first aniversary but it was not meant to happen.
He started having pain in his back last week and it got worse and he stopped eating. He got so weak over the weekend that he couldn't stand up but still refused to go to the hospital. He was trying to wait until his regular appt. on Monday morning. Although when that time came, I couldn't even sit him up in bed so I knew I couldn't get him out to the car and to the hospital so I just called the ambulance to come get him even though he told them he wasn't going when they got there. We did manage to get him there and they did xrays to find out what the problem was and told us that his liver was failing.
When I went out of the room, the dr called me over there and told me to call his family cause it would be days, possibly two. After they started giving him the intravaneous fluids, he started to feel some better and was able to talk and joke with us all day Monday, but after that, he didn't wake up at all the next 2 days except temporarily when they would move him or do something that caused more pain.
Finally on wed. night around 8 his blood pressure had started to drop and was only 59/34 and we figured it would be only moments but he tried to hang on as long as he could and it was 12:25 when he finally passed.
Needless to say, I feel like my whole world has fallen apart. Even though both our families are around, it feels like I've finally landed on that remote island and am all alone.
Anyway, He is out of his pain now and in a better place but I sure do need your prayers to help me get through this. Even though I had been married twice before, I had never experienced the kind of love that we shared. Its unreal the way we seem to be exactly what the other needed in their life. The only way I can explain it is we were like two pieces of a puzzle and we just fit. I feel like my heart has been ripped out and I don't know if it will ever be the same again.
I have to get ready to meet the the people at the funeral home so I need to end this. Thanks for letting me vent cause I feel like I'm going to explode with the pain inside.
Please pray for me.
