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Mom was in the hospital for 2 weeks. I just got back to Florida from Texas.

Several months ago, she was diagnosed with brain mets. After completeing WBR and Temador, she developed a blood clot in her leg. It was treated with Coumadin. Then suddenly, mom couldn't walk, couldn't talk, couldn't even feed herself. She was admitted to hospital and it was discovered that she had an edema. And on top of all this, the WBR and Temador didn't work. Scan done in the hospital showed that the 2 smaller brian mets were still there and the larger one was where the edema was occurring. WHY?

I don't understand. She vomited everyday in the hospital. Nothing they gave her helped. Now she is at home and my family is concerned about all the medication she's taking. We picked up 15 prescriptions. Is this amount of meds "normal."

She was supposed to have gamma knife, but now that's put on hold until her condition improves. But I can tell that she's losing faith. She keeps telling us that she's sick and tired of being sick and tired.

I'm at my wits end here. After two years, I've finally made an appointment to talk to a "talking doctor." I really don't know what to do. As a grad student, I live on a fixed income, and I'm nearly broke from flying home to see mom. I know it seems trivial, but it gets even more depressing when I check the mail and every day there is another collection notice. I can barely stay afloat financially. And to top it all of, I started smoking again!!

What do I do?


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You're only human, and you do the best you can.

Would it be possible to get a medical leave of absence to be able to leave for a while, and stay with your mom? Tell the creditors before hand what's going on, and they'll work with you. The school should too.

I'm sorry you're so stressed out. I remember grad school as being especially stressful WITHOUT outside events needing attention.

I think Becky gave the best advice in a situation like this....

Remember to breathe..... BREATHE......

Try to regain perspective.

I'll keep you and your mom in my prayers....


Prayers always,


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What a tough situation that you are in. Most campuses offer a counseling center free of charge, or charge based on a sliding scale fee. Remember that your mental health will affect your physical well-being.You might see a doctor too, sometimes antidepressants are necessary to pull you out of the slump. Good luck and prayers being offered.


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hi minnie,

i'm so sorry to hear about everything going on...i'm in a similar situation with my mom in that she too had wbr (about 2 months ago), but she started getting really bad headaches the day before yesterday. the doc put her back on decatron, and he believes that she'll need more radiation to the brain (he hinted at edema, but the docs don't want to do anymore mri/cts for a while 'cause she had so many in the past few weeks). however, she too is too weak to endure any sort of treatment right now due to the multiple infections and pulmonary embolism (she's on coumadin too) that she has been fighting off. she was vomiting too, and nothing they gave her helped either. she was in the hospital for about two weeks, and now she has a home care nurse. it really is so hard.

i'm so sorry that i don't have all the answers. your being their for your mom is such a great thing though. i'm not a smoker, but i know that it must be so difficult to try to quit when you are under so much stress. i know that cheryl mentioned free counseling at universities. i took advantage of that during my undergrad years, and it can reall help, so you may want to look into that. also, you may want to talk to someone in the financial aid office at your school to see if payments can be defered somehow. i'm not sure how all of that works though. please let me know if i can be of any help. feel free to pm me at any time. i pray for you and your mother. i know that it's so hard for you both (and for the rest of your family too).

God bless,


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