Fay A. Posted October 29, 2004 Share Posted October 29, 2004 My 24 year old son sent this to me today. What do you guys think? I'm not sure if this is funny or >frightening...... > > >ORDERING PIZZA IN 2008 > >This is so close to what is probably going to be happening in 2008 that >we're not sure how funny this really is... > >Operator: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID >number? > >Customer: Hi, I'd like to place an order. > >Operator: I must have your NIDN first, sir. > >Customer: My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's >6102049998-45-54610. > >Operator: Thank you Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland >Drive, and the phone number is 494-2366. Your office number over at >Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number is 266-2566. Email >address is firstname.lastname@example.org. Which number are you calling from sir? > >Customer: Huh? I'm at home. Where'd you get all this information? > >Operator: We're wired into the HSS, sir. > >Customer: The HSS, what is that? > >Operator: We're wired into the Homeland Security System, sir. This will >add only 15 seconds to your ordering time. > >Customer: (sighs) Oh well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat >Special pizzas. > >Operator: I don't think that's a good idea, sir. > >Customer: Whaddya mean? > >Operator: Sir, your medical records and commode sensors indicate that >you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. >Your National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy >choice. > >Customer: What?!?! What do you recommend, then? > >Operator: You might try our low-fat Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like >it. > >Customer: What makes you think I'd like something like that? > >Operator: Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your >local library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion. > >Customer: All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then. > >Operator: That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four >kids.Your 2 dogs can finish the crusts, sir. Your total is $49.99. > >Customer: Lemme give you my credit card number. > >Operator: I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. >Your credit card balance is over its limit. > >Customer: I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver >gets here. > >Operator: That won't work either, sir. Your checking account is >overdrawn also. > >Customer: Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready. >How long will it take? > >Operator: We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 >minutes,sir. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick'em up while >you're out getting the cash, but then, carrying pizzas on a motorcycle >can be a little awkward. > >Customer: Wait! How do you know I ride a motorcycle? > >Operator: It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your >car got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid for and you just filled the >tank yesterday. > >Customer: Well, I'll be a #%#^^&$%^$@# > >Operator: I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a >July 4,2006, conviction for cussing out a cop and another one I see >here in September for contempt at your hearing for cussing at a judge. >Oh yes, I see here that you just got out from a 90 day stay in the >State Correctional Facility. Is this your first pizza since your return >to society? > >Customer: (speechless) > >Operator: Will there be anything else, sir? > >Customer: Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 liter of Coke. > >Operator: I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us >from offering free soda to diabetics. The New Constitution prohibits >this. Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. > >===== >Only a fool accepts fear in place of respect. And only the most >self-delusional fool believes that NOT giving praise and NOT building >confidence can motivate subordinates to "make things happen." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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