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There was a woman who for her birthday spent $5,000. at the plastic surgeon for a new face. After her final office visit with him and quite pleased with the results, she stopped by the newsstand and asked the salesman, "Say, how old do you think I am?"

He thinks for a bit..."I would say you look about 32."

"Nope!" she replies, "I am 47."

She admires her figure and face in the store window and walks on to a McDonald's. She asks the counter girl, "How old do you think I am?" The girl says," I think you are about 29."

"No... I am 47!"

She then goes to the pharmacy and picks up some peppermints. Again, she asks the clerk... "How old do you think I am?" He says, " I think you are are 30."

"I am 47!"

She is so pleased with the results of her surgery. She steps lightly down the street to the bus stop. There is a man sitting on the bench. After some small talk, he introduces himself in a drawl, "My name is Curtis."

She seizes the opportunity once again by asking, "Say, Curtis, how old do you think I am?" Curtis replies, "Well, ma'am, you can see that I wear these extra thick glasses and I don't see too well," as he fiddles with his pocket protector, he adds, "but Ma'am I can tell you exactly how old you are by a technique I learned a long time ago." She says, "Oh really, now, how do you do that?"

"Well ma'am if you don't mind, I sure would like to tell you the answer, but the only way I can do that is if you let me feel your breasts." She looks at him, and he appears quite harmless. She looks at the empty street and agrees to his suggestion.

He reaches under there, and then he reaches under there some more. He weighs this one and then the other one and then both together. Then he explores this one and the other one and explores them again. She says finally, "Okay, Curtis, that is enough, what is your answer." He gives them a final squeeze.

Curtis says, "If I tell you how old you are, do you promise not to get mad at me?"

She says, "I promise; now, how old do you think I am?"

Curtis says, "I think you are exactly 47."

She squeals, "How did you know????"

"Well Ma'am, I was behind you in line back there at McDonalds."

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