Anais Posted January 15, 2005 Share Posted January 15, 2005 It is difficult to find the right words to comfort someone who is grieving, I heard a lot of people with good intentions make me feel worse. The funeral home gave me a pamphlet with a list of thoughts NOT to say to a grieving person : 1) "I know how you feel." The person in grief may want to scream, "No, you don't! No one knows how badly I feel!" 2) "Just call me if there is anything I can do." People in deep grief can't think straight or focus. They don't know what they need to do. 3) "It will get better." Grieving people know this intellectually, but in their heart they may feel so lost and alone. 4) "Now, now don't cry." It hurts us to see them cry and makes us sad. But, by telling them not to cry, we are trying to take their grief away. 5) "Your loved one is waiting for you over there," "God wanted him," "It was God's will," or "God knows best." Imagine how you would you feel about God after hearing such comments. Be very sensitive. Know the person's faith, and be in touch with your own. 6) Snap out of it - It wasn’t meant to be - You must be strong - H/she lived a good life - You must move on - It’s over with. Let’s not deal with it - Get a hold of yourself - You’re young - Others have it worse than you - H/she wouldn’t have been healthy - It is just nature’s way of dealing with a problem Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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