Justakid Posted January 29, 2005 Share Posted January 29, 2005 My husband is going on a business trip on Monday, all week. It's going to be the first time that I have been alone since dx, treatment, etc. Feeling a little over whelmed, trying to figure out how to get the kids ready for school, do breakfast, make lunches, fix dinner, work all day and try not to bite the kids heads off while they do their homework! Oh I didn't even think about dishes and laundry and baths for my youngest! Oh wow! Don't know about this full time parenting stuff, work is still knocking me on my butt! I have a feeling it's going to be a very stressful week for me, and very exhausting. Thank goodness my daughter can help with everything. My usual helper (mom) is so sick that she can barely get out of bed. I keep reminding her that emphezema and smoking don't go together, especially when you are sick. She knows, she just can't stop. It's frustrating to watch after everything I have been through, and it pisses me off that she won't quit (I did), but she's old and set in her ways. You can lead a horse to water BUT you can't make them drink! Just might need to do some venting next week....oh yeah and whining! Poor me, all alone and having to take care of two kids and work..........it's not like millions of others aren't doing it! Gotta keep that nebulizer and the steriods pumping so I keep my strength up! I'll be the hagered looking one next week, counting down the days till the plane lands and brings me back my "work horse"! I did tell him how much I appreciate him, trying to say all those things I'm supposed to, instead of being mean! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stand4hope Posted January 30, 2005 Share Posted January 30, 2005 . . . trying to say all those things I'm supposed to, instead of being mean! That made me grin, Beth! You are a hoot! The best way to get through next week is probably to be silly and exaggerate what a nice, fun person you are! Maybe you could just try to be goofy and act stupid and silly all week so the kids will think you've lost your mind. They'll be so afraid that they will do everything for you, including housework, laundry and homework. LOL!! I know, I know. I'm not being much help here. The only thing I can say is next week will come and go and this time, next Saturday, it will be over. Phew! Doesn't that feel good now? Love, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sharyn Posted January 30, 2005 Share Posted January 30, 2005 Hey, who says you have to be super woman??? Order in fast food, let the laundry pile up for a few days (it won't go anywhere) and just do what you absolutely MUST... don't overwhelm yourself. I will be thinking of you.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gail p-m Posted January 30, 2005 Share Posted January 30, 2005 I agree with Sharyn. There's nothing wrong with taking shortcuts. The kids love pizza and fast food. Order in Chinese food. It could be a real treat for them when Dad is away and why not??? As for lunches, there are those ready made crackers with meat and cheese -- yeah, they're expensive but for once in awhile, why not? The laundry as Sharyn said can wait. If they have enuf socks and underwear for the schoolweek, go for it. Not sure how old your kids are but they can help and make lunches and tidy the kitchen after dinner... Don't exhaust yourself. It's not worth it. Prioritize what really has to be done and what has to wait. Enjoy the week -- don't let it stress you. Gail P-M Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ry Posted January 30, 2005 Share Posted January 30, 2005 LOL oh its gonna be stressful for sure!!! I wouldn't want to be a single parent for anything. When John had to go to Florida last year I knew I was in trouble. I sat the two older kids down and gave them them the "come to Jesus" lecture which basically was something like make one wrong move and you're history. I divided up the things John did between us and then told them they could have more allowence for picking up the extra chores. I think I scared them so badly they didn't dare step out of line and all went well. Good luck!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marie Posted January 30, 2005 Share Posted January 30, 2005 I agree with Sharyn and Gail. I was a single parent for many years before Lung cancer and it was tough. But once you set your priorities straight, it isn't so bad. It doesn't matter if the laundry is done, or the house is a mess. Enjoy your kids, the rest just isn't that important. Relax, you will be fine. And by all means, order pizza or take home Wendys or whatever is easy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrea Posted January 30, 2005 Share Posted January 30, 2005 Beth, Anytime it gets stressful block everything out which should be easy since you have an EMPTY HEAD!!! Get it????? I crack myself up I like the fast food idea, you can do pizza, chinese food gives the kids veggies they need, burger king, etc. Who says you have to cook! Get one of those big frozen lasagnas and pop it in! And if the laundry gets to be too much, you can always drop it off for "fluff and fold" on your way to work And if all else fails, just bribe the kids! GOOD LUCK!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SBeth Posted January 30, 2005 Share Posted January 30, 2005 Hey Beth.... Get the door....it's Domino's! That should wipe out three chores...breakfast, lunch and dinner (not to mention dishes) and we all know that pizza works ANY time of the day. It's only for a week, make things easy on yourself and your kids will be so thrilled they may even take care of the laundry! Best of luck getting to the weekend. We'll be here for you. Love, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J.C. Posted January 30, 2005 Share Posted January 30, 2005 Beth, You will go through with flying colors, Ask the kids what they want for food, and order it, they will be delighted with fast food, use disposable dishes and make a picnic of the meals, no dishes that way. Let the clothes pile up for the middle of the week and have them help you with the washing and drying by taking them out to their favorite movie. etc-etc- You will just think on the spot and all will be fine. Take care of yourself, when you have the time. xo J.C. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ellakc2 Posted January 30, 2005 Share Posted January 30, 2005 Hey Beth, All that stuff is hard to do when you feel fine. I will keep you in my prayers and thank God your daughter can help. My mom quit smoking when she was 74 after smoking for 50 yrs. When you can't breathe it helped to scare her into quiting. It took a couple of times but she finally did it. Take care and good luck . Vent and whine away if need be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maryanne Posted January 30, 2005 Share Posted January 30, 2005 Ah come on, you can do it. Its the anticipation that is the worse. You are funny and strong, don"t put limitations on yourself. Just do what everybody says, go the pizza, chinese route. Sandwitches for lunch, cereal in moringing, no problem, you will get through this much better than you think. Buy you will probably really appreciate your hubby more when he get back. Give him an extra kiss and hug... best to you, Maryanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DebsSky Posted January 30, 2005 Share Posted January 30, 2005 Single parent, (2 boys, 11 and 6), of 6 years and counting here!!! One thing, DON'T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF.... Get what you can done, and remember, the laundry won't run away unfortunately (have hoped for that), and neither will anything else. It will all be there waiting when you can get to it, so don't worry about it. Take care of you and your kids.... Good luck, God bless, Deb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snowflake Posted January 31, 2005 Share Posted January 31, 2005 Beth, Make it fun for the kids and easy for you. One night, have a fruit "buffet". Wash a bunch of fresh fruit and serve as the meal. Won't be bad for them, fruit is healthy! Have both kids help with the dishes - either loading the dishwasher and helping to put the dishes away or splitting it to washing/drying/picking up the pieces between the three of you... Better yet, use paper plates! Laundry can wait...if you need to do a load, do a load, don't kill yourself with Martha Stewart tendencies - it's NOT a good thing. A little dust never killed anyone. Punish anyone that writes in it (hehehe). There are jobs that all ages of children can do to feel like they are an integral part in "helping Mom". Make it fun so there isn't the separation anxiety on the kiddos... Save time at bathtime, just hose 'em off! (Okay, I WAS kidding with that one.) When you have too much on your plate, something has to give. Decide what you are willing to sacrifice (for me, it's dusting) and what doesn't need to be done perfectly (vacuuming) and what truly IS important (disinfecting the kitchen and bathroom/s). Prioritize and do what you can but DON'T make it a work camp for any of you three. If you don't like the way the house looks, keep the living room and guest bathroom clean for any company that may stop by and keep the closets LOCKED! (Do NOT look under my bed if I've had a bad week...LOL) You'll be fine....really (and you'll know how tough single moms have it if you add in the "one income" factor with all the other stresses). You can do this, you've done chemo! Housework won't make your hair fall out... Want some recipes? PM me... I don't want the food police hitting me for my questionable habits...LOL Take care, Becky Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remembering Dave Posted January 31, 2005 Share Posted January 31, 2005 Beth - McDonalds - every night! I just love their new salads! Don't worry about the laundry. it can wait. maybe even some of the dishes! Glad you told Kurt how much you appreciate him, but I think doing a little laundry and dishes when he returns is small payment to make for five days in Orlando! Karen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
close to the edge Posted January 31, 2005 Share Posted January 31, 2005 remember all those people who said if theres anything i can do if you need help with anything just call CALL THEM they will be delighted to help you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Amy P Posted January 31, 2005 Share Posted January 31, 2005 Beth - I just did the same thing a couple of weeks ago and boy was I glad when my hubby got home although the house was a mess! We only had one incident - my hubby teaches at a private school so our girls go to school there so he always takes them to school because I work at the opposite end of town - so one of my daughters teachers offered to bring take the girls to school for me but I had to have them at her house at 7:10 - that Friday - we got up late @ 7:00 (not sure what happened ) so I ended up having to take the day off because Mom had a Dr's appt that day as well. I did as other have said - we ordered in Pizza and ate sandwiches - I just didn't want to deal with the headaches and I am not dealing with cancer. I will be thinking of you this week....you have amazing strength - you will get through it and the kids will too! Much Love, Amy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
richinsdakota Posted February 1, 2005 Share Posted February 1, 2005 Haaa! This is the funniest thread Ive seen yet...heheh...but some good advice, along with the absurd..heheh... Only thing I could add; is "Bring home the Colonel" ....(jus so you get him outa there in time!.) heheh....good lluck...Rich B. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justakid Posted February 1, 2005 Author Share Posted February 1, 2005 Day 1 What a crappy day at work! Last day of the month, everyone wants a loan approval on their house and wants it done yesterday. Worked like a dog all day, came home....luckily my Mom was here, with her oxygen machine, looking like hell! Between the two of us, we pulled off dinner, homework, got the dirty clothes downstairs and I made a plan of attack for the morning. Wish I was in Orlando with the husband though! Tomorrow is tuesday and we are one day closer to Saturday! I do feel sorry for him when he gets home though, cause the laundry will be piled to the ceiling! Tomorrow has to be a better day at work then today. I get to go to the Oncologist for Tarceva rash follow up and the Gastro Doc for esophagus stretching follow up on Thursday. I tell you managing cancer and a career and home life is exhausting! Wish I could give up the career, disability looks good! Thanks for the support! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
richinsdakota Posted February 1, 2005 Share Posted February 1, 2005 Yea, sorry...sounds like a tough week...hang in there hon. Hope it gets better soon....Rich B. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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