Jump to content

Goal: Florida

Kel M

Recommended Posts

Hi all,

Wednesday evening Mom's doctor came in to say that Mom's cancer has spread beyond the lung. It is, however, in an unusual place (near the surface on her right side). It is not affecting any major organs so the doctor will work on managing any pain associated with it and will confer with colleagues about any treatment.

Needless to say, it was a major blow. Mom didn't tell me until I got to the hospital Friday but I knew something was up on Thursday. I could hear it in her voice even though she was trying hard to be her cheerful self.

Ah... this tricky rollercoaster of a ride. Friday was difficult. I alternated between smiling and crying. I even lost it in front of Mom a few times which made me feel worse. I don't want to add to her pain. I told her I was selfish and not ready to be without her. Then, I kind of laughed and admitted that I wasn't being fair.

I guess we needed Friday to get our game faces on again. Saturday Mom left the hospital to go out for lunch and Sunday we went for a drive, took a walk in Mount Royal Park (she walked half a kilometre with only minimal support) and took in the crisp winter air (and beautiful sun!).

We are planning an overnight visit home this Friday. As our goal is still to travel to Florida (5 weeks from today), we need to slowly build Mom's confidence about functioning outside of the hospital context. She's excited about it and it's giving her the drive she needs to go on.

These are beautiful but bittersweet days. I watched her turn her face to the sun yesterday and wanted to commit the image to memory because I don't know how many of those days are left. Hopefully years worth!

Mom is a retired school teacher. Through this illness she has continued to teach by example. Her courage, her passion for life and her ability find the positive in such a difficult circumstance continue to show me, and others, the way.

I'd appreciate your prayers and good thoughts as we endeavour to get her to Florida for a walk on the beach and some golf (we putted a hundred balls between us in the hospital on Saturday).

Know that you are in my thoughts and prayers too. Courage, all!


Link to comment
Share on other sites

Kel, I am remembering both you and your mom in my prayers. I'm in central Florida and I can tell you that we're having some beautiful weather right now. This time of the year (especially March) seems to always be especially beautiful here. Please keep us updated on your mom's progress!

Link to comment
Share on other sites


Your mom was dx'd before me...and I was limited stage too. Just found out about 10 days ago that I now have the cancer back in my liver and pancreas.

The fact that your mom's cancer has spread outside the lung.....I guess I'm having trouble understanding WHY her doctors aren't being more positive about second line chemo or tx?

Forgive me for not remembering all the details....including the reason she was in the palliative care unit to begin with. Lately, my thoughts have been awfully muddled (as I'm sure you can imagine)....but you know, I hope while you're in FL. that maybe you'll consider getting another opinion! Or get one there, before you go, better still. I'm just troubled that her doctors aren't actively coming up with a new game plan to try to beat this!

I told my hubby a long time ago, that there may come a time when I cannot take any more treatment and may opt to stop. He was hurt and angry that I would consider making such a decision "without him". Dear man....I told him that of course, I'd have his input....but ultimately the amount a patient can take.....is up to the patient!

Talk to your mom. Find out if she is willing to have more tx....and if her docs won't discuss it....then find a new onc!

I feel a sort of kinship with your mother because we're both golfers. I hope to get a few more rounds in myself before I check out...maybe even one at Pebble Beach!! How's that for dreaming big? Maybe I'm just not absorbing things quite right....but I just sort of got the notion that your mom's docs aren't really fighting for her....as much as mom herself or you are willing to fight.

Forgive my meddlesome comments....but I'd like to see both your mom AND myself back out there playing golf all the time. :wink: Tell her I'm keeping her in my thoughts and hoping she has more tx that successfully takes care of things!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You sound like my daughter!!

Many times I sit out back and when the sun has been really bright I turn towards it and feel the heat on my face. It feels so good. Of course my eyes are closed but I imagine the bright white/warmth of Heaven. Once my daughter asked me what I was doing?? I told her I missed tanning! HA!

I too, am planning a trip to FL in May I HOPE!!! I do NOT golf tho!

Like your mom she probably puts those moments of having the sun in her face to --picture memories-- for later!

May God bless. Also---see about a second line of treatment! I had a relapse in 2003 and I have done well since that treatment too. I am now at 4 yrs. It was also extensive.

Love cindy

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.