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Time for Blonde Jokes

Fay A.

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Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking - one blonde says to the other;

"Which do you think is farther away, "Florida or the moon?"

The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see

Florida...... ?????


A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic

it died. After working on it for a few minutes, the Beamer is idling smoothly. She asks, "What's the story?"

He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor Ladie"

The blonde quips, "How often do I have to do that?"


An officer of the law stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you

guys would get your act together. Geez, it was just yesterday you take away my license, and now today, you are expecting me to show it to you!"


A blonde is out for her daily walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo Missy!" she shouts, "How may I get to the other side?" The second blonde looks up the river, then down the river, and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."


A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights

and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, PULL OVER!"

"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"


A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn.

She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"


A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new

dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"

"HelOOOooo,"!!! answered the blonde. "They're watch dogs!"

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