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Help..... dad not doing well.


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Dad had his third round of chemo recently and he isn't doing well. His girlfriend called and said that he hasn't eaten in three days, hasn't urinated even in two days. He is too weak to hold up his head. He can't even talk to me on the phone. This chemo is supposed to be only precautionary as the surgery was succesful. How can he be helped? He refuses to go to the hospital. His girlfriend said that if he isn't better by the morning, she will call an ambulance and see if they can talk him into going. To me, it sounds as if he is dehydrated. He had a stomach bug a week or so ago with vomiting and diarrhea. This round of chemo had been put off last month because his immune system "bottomed out" per his doctors. Any words of wisdom or advice? I want him to go to the hospital. How can I get through to him across the miles?

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Yes, he probably is dehydrated if he was sick. Sounds like he lost a lot of fluid. Just tell him he didn't come this far to die of dehydration and if he can't drink he needs to go in for IV fluids. Good luck!

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Amy,

A test you can do to test for dehydration is for his girlfriend to pinch your dad's skin between her fingers. Have her do it on his hand or tummy. If the skin stays up for a bit he is dehydrated. If he is not, the skin will rebound back down. Tell her to try it on her own hand first to gauge the response. Perhaps if he has a visual of dehydration, he will be willing to go get IV fluids. My Mom always bounced back quickly after fluids.

I hope I explained that clearly!!! It is harder to describe than to do!

Faylene

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Well, if know if he's like most dads, he will be madder than heck at you if you INSIST, but that's what you might have to do. If he can't lift his head he can't hit you (just kidding) and he probably isn't strong enough to cuss at you, so go for it.

Tell him what Ry said:

Just tell him he didn't come this far to die of dehydration

and start bawling if you have to, but get him to the doctor if at all possible.

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Your dad's kidneys could shut down if he doesn't get help right away. He needs lots of fluids. Sometimes you have to insist the patient take in liquids and nourishment whether they want it or not. They are often not a good judge of that because they give in to the nausea ,etc. Please get him to a doctor or the ER right away. Don

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I know that you are so far away. If she doesn't call the ambulance tonight, then maybe you can... as ridiculous as that sounds, it is not so ridiculous at all. dial 1-XXX-XXXX...! call to get him help. I agree . He has come too far to let this take him out.

love, Cindi o'h

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Sounds like dehydration to me, although I'm by no means an expert. I do know that not urinating in two days can be very serious!! You should try and do whatever is in your power to get your Dad to the ER. I know it's tough with you so far away but this sounds critical. Has his girlfriend tried to get any Ensure or something similar down him? I'm keeping both you and your Dad in my prayers!

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Amy,

this is a tough one, especially long-distance. The others gave some good advice. I just want to tell you I'm sending positive thoughts for some improvement soon, and keeping all of you in my prayers.

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Amy,

I am sending you and your dad my prayers. I know 'dads' can be kind of stubborn and often don't want a fuss made but he sounds like he needs to get this taken care of. I'm sure this is really tough on you having your family to take care of and being a distance away from you dad.

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Hi Gang,

Heard from Amy this morning. Here's what she wrote:

I am at work right now, but got a call that an ambulance was called for him last night. He was admitted to the hospital for severe dehydration. He has IV fluids. His remaining lung is very congested and he is still very weak. I will update as I know more. Thanks Fay for your help!!

Prayers for Amy and a quick recovery for dad.

Faylene

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