Connie Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 Hi - It's very helpful to read some of these threads and I'm glad you all are willing to share! My husband Tom was diagnosed with SCLC, with cancer in the lung, one lymph node, and his liver. On 1/13 he began a series of 4 week cycles of chemo using irinotecan and cisplatin. So far he's felt well, except for some of the side effects of the treatments. I'm having a hard time accepting this diagnosis- the stats are very grim and I'm scared. My husband has been very upbeat about beating this, which I am thankful for, but I'm feeling like a rat for being so scared. He and I have always been able to share our feelings, but I don't want to bring him down. How do others handle this? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deanna M. Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 Connie, I am so sorry to hear about your husband. My mom just got diagnosed this Jan. also. She has the sclc also and it has met. to the pancreas. My mom is very hopeful also. She has responded so well to treatments thus far. She was quite sick before she started treatment so she feels very well now in comparison. I am so scared too when I read the stats. But I keep telling myself she can beat the stats. And who knows what they will come out with in the near future. I just hold out hope for that. And most of all I try to enjoy every good moment with her now. Coming here really helps, it gives you lots of hope and support. I will keep your husband in my prayers that he will make a complete recovery. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kimblanchard Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 Connie, I too am very scared about my husband who was given a poor prognosis. It really does help to come here and read the posts. Just remember (and I tell myself this) that statistics are averages - just numbers - and many are not up-to-date with all the advances in medicine. I try and just take one day at a time if I can. Prayers to you, Peg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gail Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 Statistics are just numbers. Only God knows when it's time. I have reminded myself over and over again. Stay with us. This is a wonderful place. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karma1976 Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 Connie SandyS suggested a book that i bought for my mom. My mom loves it and it is very inspirational. "There's No Place Like Hope - A Guide to Beating Cancer in Mind-Sized Bites" by Vickie Girard. I thank sandys for posting this book! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ginnyd Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 Connie, My husband was diagnosed in Sept. The first 3 months I filled up every 30 seconds it seemed. I was scared to death. He always said he was going to beat it. When we went to the first oncologist he said I can't guarantee you a cure, not even 50%. When we left, my husband said I didn't hear any bad news, did you? That has always been his attitude. It is now over 5 months. Am I still scared, you betcha. But I don't cry nearly as often. I do what I have to do to get him and keep him as healthy and happy as possible. I stay VERY busy, it stops you from dwelling. And this board is a miracle. The people here are so supportive and full of love and caring. Stay with us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DaveG Posted March 2, 2003 Share Posted March 2, 2003 Connie: I can only speak from the survivor side. I have, however, been very cognizant of my wife and her feelings about all this. It doesn't matter what Stage, or type of lung cancer a person has, it's all the same. The numbers are downright scary, but I saw that the numbers do not equal 100%, therefore people survive. Many on this board have seen me write this before. By virtue of our name: LUNG CANCER SURVIVORS FOR CHANGE we are about SURVIVORSHIP. We are about HOPE, which is what we offer here. We are about LOVE, which abounds here. And we are about SUPPORT. We welcome you to LCSC. It is too bad that you have to come here, but you are among very wonderful, loving, and caring people, the best in the world, where lung cancer is concerned. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted March 3, 2003 Share Posted March 3, 2003 Connie, being scared is normal. We've all been there. My wife has NSCLC and I am the primary caregiver. As the caregiver, I see my role to give her as much hope and optimism as she needs. To do that, I have to reach out to others to get my support where I can express my fears, anger, frustration, etc. freely. I am lucky to have a good friend I can do this with, but I also have a caregiver from my church community whose job is to listen to me, keep in touch with me, and see how I am doing. That helps me a great deal. We all need that kind of help. I hope you can find someone who can fulfill that role for you. AND, you have a lot of friends here who understand, so use us! Blessings. Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mittlers Posted March 3, 2003 Share Posted March 3, 2003 Connie, My mom was also diagnosed with SCLC on 1/3/03 with mets to the Liver. She is doing very well with her Chemo and the tumors are shrinking and disappearing. I do not pay any attention to the statistics. This board is a great place to get support. Please keep us updated. I will keep you and your husband in my prayers. God Bless, Susan M. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie Posted March 3, 2003 Share Posted March 3, 2003 Connie Hello and welcome, I am sorry to hear that your husband Tom has SCLC and it sure is scarey. We have been there and know how you are feeling. My Mom had SCLC too... the chemo did its job and now she is in remission and doing great. She was very positive and upbeat through most of her treatment as well and they say that attitude is half the battle!! I will pray for you and Tom. Please keep us posted on his condition and know that you are among friends. Laurie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kimblanchard Posted March 4, 2003 Share Posted March 4, 2003 Connie, When you first get the diagnosis...it's hard to give your head around all of it. It is a horrific shock to the system, your mind, your soul. Actually - I think I cried every 30 minutes for the first 3 days....then it got better and although I can't say it gets easier....it gets more "manageable". For one thing...as you begin the treatments - you are DOING something and it seems to feel like you are waging a battle. With each battle won - you feel like you can win the war. Attitude is EVERYTHING Connie...and the more positive you can remain...the better it will be for your husband. No one but God knows the number of days we have on this earth. Statistics are not accurate...because we are people, not statistics. Everyone reacts differently to treatment. Also remember this...the statistics are old....the biggest share of "statistics" are based on 20 year studies...starting in the 1980's. There are tons of new drugs and new treatments that are too 'new' to be factored into the numbers. The simple truth? Medical science has never really known time lines and with the fast changing technology and discoveries...it knows even less. On December 3, 2002 when my husband's cancer returned the doctor told him he could maybe give him a couple of months....Well - it's going on 4 months now. Today Mike and I went to Denny's for lunch and then went to Walmart to pick up some things. Does this sound like a dying man to you? Not to me. And where there is life - there is hope. There are a lot of reasons to believe your husband can beat this...you just have to focus on them. Constantly remember - you husband has cancer, he is not dying. Cancer is not an automatic death sentence. Cancer is survivable. DO NOT listen to doomsayers. There will be those that can't say a thing positive to you. STAY AWAY from them! Surround yourself with hope, life and joy....No one knows if they have tomorrow. Love and hugs, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DaveG Posted March 4, 2003 Share Posted March 4, 2003 I come here for my daily dose of ENTHUSIASM. No trouble finding it on this thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connie Posted March 4, 2003 Author Share Posted March 4, 2003 this is Connie again - I just read all your responses - thank you! Sometimes I think I just need to acknowledge how frightening it all is, and then move on - I too am both hopeful and scared. And I agree that doing what I can helps. Tom has more tests this week, which we'll review with our doctor next monday, and we'll have a better sense of how the treatmetns are working. Thanks again! Connie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tiny Posted March 4, 2003 Share Posted March 4, 2003 Dear Connie, I'm glad if the Message Board is helping you cope, but know how anxious you will be this coming week until you get more information on Monday. Try to keep busy and take good care of one another each day. Sending "Rah-Rah's" and prayers your way for Tom and family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connie B Posted March 5, 2003 Share Posted March 5, 2003 Hi Connie, Well my dear, I am soooo very happy to see you post to this wonderful board for love, support and education. Your in the right spot my friend! As caregivers we feel just as much fear at times as the patient does, and sometimes more! As you know, I have been on both sides of this fence, being a caregiver and now a survivor. Neither side of this fence is a cake walk, but it sure as heck helps to have so many wonderful people walking the walk with us as we journey this very bumpy road. I know when I was a caregiver to my dad, mom and sister, I use to say to myself, "Connie B, stop being such a baby about this, I'm not the one with cancer"! WRONG!!!!! This is a FAMILY/Freinds disease and it impacts us all and devestates us at times to no return. (we think)! And yes it is okay to be such a baby(if that's the case) about all this crap that has entered our lives. Each day will get a little, what I like to call (softer) to deal with as time goes on. And each and everyone of us needs a place to VENT, BUMP, or CRY or even just make fun of things. Your in a very safe place here and you will not be alone. Warm and Gentle Hugs, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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