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HOPE injection #2


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Friends are those rare people who ask how we are

and then wait to hear the answer.

Ed Cunningham

Who has been your biggest source of support during your journey with LC and why?

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My husband.

*I don't like to ask for help, even when I need it. Normally, he just knows and I don't have to ask.

*He's been around to pick me up on the low days.

*He's washed my hair when I couldn't lift my arms.

*He cleaned out the wounds from my chest tubes when they just wouldn't heal - and he 'doesn't do blood well'.

*He's an everpresent presence, even when he's no where near me.

*He tells me he still thinks I'm pretty.

*He's still here.

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Well, you guys, of course. :wink:

I have to echo the husband vote, for a similiar reason. I never like to admit that I need help, and he quietly steps in to help me, without being asked or making it obvious. He lets me live in my fantasy world.

My best friend from waaay back "keeps it real" for me by continuing to do all the non-cancer things with me we did before. She is concerned about my mom too, having known her all these years, but she helps me have fun too. We paint each others houses, mix rum drinks, sing along with Jimmy Buffett, bargain shop with a vengeance, and act like the goofballs we've always been.

:) Kelly

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My biggest supporter for me when Daddy was sick was my husband.

He was always, always positive about Daddy's prognosis and that kept me from "going to the bad place" for 4 years... He stressed the importance of appreciating the good times while they were here and to deal with the bad times when we need to. He was also there for my Daddy ... driving 40 miles at a moments notice to help him get up a flight of stairs, take him to Chemo... Whatever he needed or wanted my Michael was there for him. During Daddies last week of life, Michael never left the hospital... How do you ever repay someone for that type of dedication? I guess you don't... you simply remember and hope one day to be able to be there for him in the same way.

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Other than this group, I would have to say my biggest supporter was my friend, Sue. She was always there for me and was always ready to help. She has broad shoulders for crying on and for leaning on. She has great ears for listening. I have no idea how I would have survived without her strength and guidance.

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Our greatest support is through our faith and with each other. A close second is our family and all our neighbors, friends and church members who have rallied to help us along the way, and still continue to do so after almost 3 years. We are very blessed. This website is a close third, with all the great people here to support and help. Don

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My husband has been my greatest support through this as well as the best friend I've ever had in my life.

He listens to my ups and downs and tries to keep life normal.

He never complains.

He drove me to every doctor's appointment and radiation treatment and waited patiently with a smile on his face.

He never let me see him sad about me.

He picked me up when I fell and fainted.

I love him so for all of that.

Joanie

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When Joel was diagnosed, just lots of family and friends who came to visit not just for the one time thing, but continuous through phone calls, emails and coming over again and again.

There were disappointments also, but that is not for this post.

Maryanne

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I'm glad you gave us this injection, KatieB, because, as I was thinking what I'd answer, I realised just how very forunate I have been to have so many caring friends! :D Thanks for that GOOD feeling!

My husband, Mark, has been as much a best friend as husband to me. He stayed at the hospital for the better part of 9 days and nights straight when I was completely unconscious and wouldn't have known if he gone to work. He washed my hair in the kitchen sink when I first got home from the hospital and couldn't lift my arms. He has gone through all of this with me. I can say ANYTHING to him, even when I sometimes want to talk about what I'd like if I do die; he doesn't like to think about it, but I know I can get it out of my system without feeling guilty or morbid.

My oldest friend, Sally, flew out from California to sit with me in the ICU while I was unconscious. She and her husband have 3 kids and they can't afford to fly here and there. But, she thought I might die and she said, "I was just NOT going to let you go!" She crocheted and talked to me, even though I was as responsive as a doorstop. We've been friends since I was 2 years old and she was crawling! She always says we're more like sisters and now I know she really means it!

My new friend, Kim, also drove the hour and a half it took to sit with me while I was knocked out. I've only known her 18 months, but we have become very close. She spent hours researching my cancer on the internet and is always there when I need help being positive. She makes me laugh!

And, of course, all of you! I don't think there's a way to measure all the comfort and wisdom I've received from friends here. You're all THE BEST!

Leslie

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I'm late seeing this one. Wow, good question.

First, my husband Jim. Although he was the one battling the disease, he worried about it's affect on me. We were each other's biggest support.

Secondly, my best friend KoKo who lives 2 houses away. She lost her father to SCLC 30 years ago and her brother (her BEST friend) to NSCLC in 1996. She took care of him throughout his illness and understood alot of what Jim and I were going through.

She believes there is a reason we ended up living by each other and becoming best friends long ago.

Third, but NOT last, I found this board several months after Jim's diagnosis and lived here in the evenings while he slept. Just wasn't able to post then. THANKS TO ALL OF YOU!

Lynne

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My husband has always been my biggest supporter but a close 2nd is both my Brother Charlie and Sister Debbie who flooded me with phone calls to let me talk out my feelings. I got cards from them also and they just said the right thing.

When ever I got off the phone with Charlie I felt a sense of inner peace and loved talking with him.

When my Sis Deb and I talked ( she had been through breast cancer the yr before) knew how I was feeling inside. Granted it was their Brother too that had stage 4 lung cancer but it had been 20 years since they had lived by him and in no way knew Alan as I did. They hurt, yes, but not like I was hurting.

Mom called all the time too and so did my other Brothers and Sister but it was those 3 that saw me through the horror of losing my Brother and one of my very best friends.

God Bless,

Jane

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My biggest supporter has been my husband Fred. Right now my Dads lung cancer is taking such a toll on my Dad and Fred drives with me every week the 4 hours and helps me take care of all my dads bills,shopping, appt.s........dispite his mother also battling lymphoma and his constant support of her. I will be forever grateful.

I am also so grateful for everyone on this site, it has helped me so very much

NancyT

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All the folks who responded to me when I joined this group. Each time I received a response I'd sit here and cry (relief) because everyone was reassuring and wonderful. I'd share what folks wrote with my hubbie who had the LC and it helped him too. This was really our main source of help because our kids were looking to us for strength and we couldn't really vent to them much. That is why I am compelled to return here again and again. I pray for a cure for this dreaded disease!

Much love to you all.

Cyndy

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My best friend for the past 15 years (half my life! :shock: ), Melissa, who i walked the path of her mother's battle with breast cancer with when we were the tender age of 19 and still thought life would always just be. She's been able to give me so much good advice, listen to me rant, and celebrate the small steps with me (and Mom) in a way that none of my other friends can. I know it hurts her terribly when she talks with me about chemo/radiation and side effects...about hospitalizations and releases...she has to relive the loss of her mother...yet she does it willingly to ease my fears and concerns.

A very close second is my dear husband, Mark, who never imagined when we married that he'd walk with me through the loss of two very good friends, the loss of my father, and this battle with lung cancer with Mom. His heart breaks with mine with each bit of bad news and swells with joy with mine with each small step forward...and yet he finds the power to support me when i feel i'm faltering. What a great guy!

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God. Followed by my children (who were only in their mid to late teens at the time of my diagnosis), my brother, two close friends, and the folks on various Internet Lung Cancer Support groups. In the past 8 months my Husband has become more of what he should have been from the beginning. But there were many times when the only emotional support I received came from the friends I made on the Internet Boards. And I eventually found a "home" with this one.

The folks who participate on Lung Cancer message boards are responsible for saving my life-by sharing information about their own experiences-too many times to count. I take what you've written, and research it, and then file it away for future use or apply to my current situation. And I remember you in my prayers with concern, and hope and gratitude.

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I love these injections Katie! Really makes you think.

My biggest supporter was my husband. Wow, what a friend. He never got tired of listening to me cry and talk about my mom. He would give my mom shoulder rubs, foot rubs, make her laugh, keep her mind preoccupied and make her dinner. I thought he was cute when I met him, but now, after this, he's just the most gorgeous man I've ever met. He also remained calm and selflessly thought of me when he was grieving my mom himself. I also had an aunt, who was just solid. She was solid as rock to me. I needed her and she was so there for me.

I also had this board. Without this board, I wouldn't have met all the wonderful people who have supported me. Not only did I find supportive motherly type people like Peggy, Ginny, Gloria, Cindy and just so many others, I had Katie B., Andrea B, Andrea S, Denise and Stephanie...just so many people...please forgive me if I haven't listed you.. With some friends that didn't know what to say or act, I could come to all of you and just know that you understood. You never judged my emotions. I had some people in my life disappoint me, but I found so many solid friendships here that it doesn't matter to me.

Thank you to you all on the board that took the time to be there for me!

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As I am the caretaker to my husband, who has lung cancer; it doesn't seem right to say that he is my biggest supporter, although my best friend. I'd have to say that our next door neighbor has become my rock. The funny part is that we were neighbors for over a year and hardly spoke; then they found out about Bill's diagnosis and having been thru a similar situation in her family, she reached out to offer support and has been here for me constantly. Any time of the day or night I can run over in my jammies and have a good cry or just hang out and watch movies...whatever I need. She's become my pillar of strength thru all this and taught me a great deal about people and myself. Through tragedy comes many great things.

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