lilyjohn Posted October 30, 2005 Share Posted October 30, 2005 I don't know if I should say this but welcome to the real world This goes on all of the time and not by inexperienced doctors but those who should know better. They get their head in the air and their ego makes them say anything to make them look like they know everything. I met with that attitude everyday with Johnny. The nurse that started the problems with a careless remark, The doctor who wouldn't give him anything for anxiety because we brought the idea to him. The same doctor changing medication that was working because the other doctor had approved it after we went behind his back to get it. Then he lied about the strength of the medications to excuse what he did. When we asked if the cancer was as bad as when first diagnosed he wouldn't answer. When I asked how the exrays looked compared to the others he hadn't compared them. Then he couldn't campare exrays to CTscans. He made every excuse not to answer our questions yet he told Johnny that he was not going to get any better only worse. He did that not knowing how anything compared and knowing about the anxiety. Oh and I can't forget the two doctors that harrased him trying to force him to sigh a DNR. One lied to him and the other refused to treat him and dumped him on another hospital after he almost killed him with a drug he was alergic to and had refused This is just the tip of the iceberg. I could give you a list of lies that covers a whole page. That is just from the one doctor. But we got that from everyone. I'm so sorry that you had to learn this this way but there are those in the medical profession that don't belong there. The just have no idea of how to treat other humans. File complaints but be prepared to have his behavior excused. I found out the hard way that medical boards are not there for the patient but to cover the asses of the doctors who screw up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maryanne Posted October 30, 2005 Share Posted October 30, 2005 Hi Kim, You know that I really feel bad for all that has happened to you. There was some very bad decisions and inexperience doctors which cause you so much grief. That is inexcusable, and something should definitely be done about it. But I also want to point this out. There are wonderful doctors out there who really care and have saved many lives. These unforunate events, that has happened to you, and some others here is not the norm. I would guess that most of the people here have very good health care providers I am saying this as I want the newcomers to know that there are more good doctors out there than ones that just don't care. My husband had wonderful doctors who saved his life. They are his herso's. Kim besides feeling so frustrated for you, I want you to know that I am thinking of you and I am really glad that that idiot doctor (or however he was) was so wrong. Thank G-d. I really hope you will not through anything like this again. Take care, Maryanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daggiesmom Posted October 30, 2005 Share Posted October 30, 2005 I am so sorry you and Mom had to go through this bull....... No one should be treated as you were. My hope is going down the road you will have much better treatment. I must say that I had very bad treatment at the beginning of my journey with this. That only lasted a short time. I then, thanks to my brother-in-law, was sent to the best doctor in the world. Boy, I sure wish he could teach others how to be a good doctor. He is so wonderful with patients. I really wish everyone had someone as good as he is to guide them thru this maze of cancer. You keep on fightin' and give Mom a hug from me((())). Joanie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandyW Posted October 30, 2005 Share Posted October 30, 2005 I Just thought that you might take comfort in knowing that you are not alone in this situation with a member of the medical profession. I have had similar experiences with my wifes hospitalization Drs. Went to my family dr in order to calm down emotionally and he set me right on things. There is always 1 Bad apple in the bunch. Tell people and get rid of the apple and things will be ok we hope. Good luck and am always praying for us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kimmek Posted October 30, 2005 Author Share Posted October 30, 2005 I cetainly in no way feel this treatment is what you get in the "real world", as you said Maryann 99 percent of doctors are wonderful, the best. But that one bad apple will ruin in for all. I dont know where would be were it not for her awesome doctors, I am just thankful this one doctor was not part of her regular team of doctors. Her pulmonologist does need some lessons in bedside manners if he is going to treat people with lung troubles regardless if the smoked or not. But luckily we do not have to ever go back to him after Monday. I am going to take Mom to her follow up from the hospital stay with him. Then on December 5th we have a appointment out at Univerity of Texas Health Center where they have a state of the art Pulmonary Program. I feel so lucky to have gotten Mom in out there and am praying they have some answers for us. Will keep you guys posted Thank for the support as always you are the bestest!! Kim Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilyjohn Posted October 30, 2005 Share Posted October 30, 2005 I think I owe all of you an apology. I reacted to this post without thinking. That makes me guilty of the very thing that I hate the most. I know how important trust is. There can not be hope without some form of trust. So please accept my apology. The last thing in the world I would ever want to do is cause someone to lose that trust and because of that lose hope. I do know there are many good doctors. I was just unfortunate to meet many of the bad ones. The outcome as you all know was devistating to both me and Johnny. The truth is that doctors are human. There are good and there are bad ones. I think what got me riled enough to say the things I did was because so many acted shocked that something like that happened. All you have to do is look at some of the other respones here to see it is not as rare as we would want to believe. I think part of the problem today is that there are so many specialists. That can be good and bad. While a doctor may be very good in his own field he knows nothing about others especially the emotional impact that a careless remark can have. Even if what he told you and your mom were true he was wrong. It is one thing to be honest (that is what most tell themselves they are doing) and quite another to be cruel. What he did to you and your mom was cruel and uncalled for. There is a very fine line between determination and hopelessness. Sometimes all it takes is one remark to to cross that line. So many of the treatments for cancer are in themselves hard on a person. Just imagine going through all of that and believing that you are really doing well then having someone just as much as tell you it was all for nothing Tami what happened to you is terrible. I learned both in caring for Johnny and in my work sense then that there are those (not all) but many who have that same attitude. As long as all is going well and they can point to a person as their success story they behave well. Let something come up that they don't know how to handle and things change for the worse. Unfortunately there is a part of our society that would want to just push these people aside and forget about them. They just want to move on to someone who they feel they can help more. I will always believe that is wrong. Everyone deserves an even chance. They can only get that chance when there is hope and determination. Not just on their part but on the part of the ones they have to trust their lives to. When I first joined this board I did it with the intention of making people aware that things like this do happen. I thought that people would want to know so they could protect themselves. Instead I find that most people protect themselves better by not knowing. A few years ago I would have done the same thing. So again I will say I am truly sorry if my words upset anyone. That was never my intention. Just be cautious and watch for warning signs. Protect yourselves anyway you need to. Just know that if someone does something so cruel or makes a mistake there are other alternatives. I feel very humble right now. I have been blessed with so many things. I am able to give to people who need special care and in turn that gives so much back to me. Maybe that is the reason I have been through so much instead of to warn people as I first thought. May God bless each and everyone of you. This disease is the enemy. It just takes such a heavy toll on us all. Lillian Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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