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Getting to Know You - October 14


Ann

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If someone were to drop in your house for an unannounced visit today, would you be comfortable with the way your house looks or would you be really angry with yourself for not cleaning?

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I have to jump right in here and lead this one off...lol! As some of you know, I'm a semi-professional crafter and do a lot of shows this time of the year. Right now, I am even ashamed for my own children to stop by my house and see the clutter and chaos. Both my kitchen table and dining room table are filled with strange things such as Penguin Stew, Snowman Farts, Snowman Soup, Spider Cider...just to mention a few!!! My last show is on November 19th so I will have the house back to perfection by then. In the meantime, unless you can efficiently operate a glue gun, stay away!!!

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My house has always had that "lived" in look. Any of my frieds or family who drop by unannoucnced know me well enough to know my house will never pass "white glove" test. Thank goodness Alan knew going into this marriage that housekeeping was not one of my strong points!!!! (left dishes in the sink this morning) :wink:

Debbie

Husband Alan DX small cell lung cancer Jan 10th 2005

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After my dx we got a cleaning lady!

I no longer have to worry about the place needing cleaning,which was always a concern, but........if you drop by on Sunday and Monday you'll see just how much needs picking up before she comes on Tuesday!!!!!! Don't want her to think we're pigs.

I'm not letting this perk go, had 31 years of trying to keep ahead of the game and now someone else does it for me, I love it.

Having said all that I still have moments when I hope nobody comes to the door, my favorite thing is to leave dishes in the sink.

Have to run, my husband is on his way home from out of town and I have dishes to do!!!!!

Geri

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We moved to FL just 3 weeks after my 2nd surgery last Nov. We only have one room and parts of the garage to unpack. No one has to see those places. After I finished chemo we got cleaning help and they are wonderful. You may stop in unexpectedly any day but Thurs. and Fri. I just finished putting things away for their noon visit. Now, if I just had a cook . . .

Muriel K

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BC (before cancer) everything had to be just PERFECT for people to be able to stop in! Seems perfection is a Virgo trait. Although I must admit I did fall short.

However AC (after cancer) a perfectly neat and tidy house is not on my list of big concerns. So you can stop by anytime. Things may be laying around. Dog hair may be on the carpet. Kitchen table will probably be cluttered with catalogues. But I would just love to have your company.

Funny how cancer changes your perception about LOTS of things.

I got the coffee on! Come on over!!!!

Kasey

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I have to chime in on this one. I'm very familiar with Bunny's suggested website (flylady.net). I have been an active member of www.messies.com for a number of years and have almost every single book written by Sandra Felton, and by others.

I used to be very, very messy and still have to work very hard at being organized and decluttering my home and office, but these organizations, books and tips they recommend have helped a lot.

If you came over right now, it is a mess because of the construction going on, and things are piled in one room or another because of emptying other rooms to be worked on. It is very messy and very dirty, but I wouldn't care if anyone saw it because I think they would understand the reason for the messes. At first, I was going home every night and trying to clean up the dust, drywall dust and sawdust everywhere, but finally gave up and have decided to just give everything a thorough cleaning when they are finished.

I love this subject because I have worked so hard at overcoming being a "messy". I even led a messies' group for a while. It was a lot of fun!

Love to all,

Peggy

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My house is an out of control construction zone, populated with out of control contractors and residents.....and a dog.

Drop on by, but don't expect to be able to breathe. Leaving the premises clean and dust free at the end of every day was written into the contract, and has not been followed. :roll:

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Well, Jim was the total caretaker of the house, yard, cars, etc. Does that give you a BIG hint? I'll have to check out the flylady and I am now borrowing Bunny's CHAOS acronymn.

Every few weeks, I do pick up and clean the living, dining, and kitchen areas as those are the only rooms someone would see if they "dropped in".

I read somewhere that it sure would be sad if you, or your friend, died tomorrow and you didn't let your friend over for a visit because the house wasn't in order. I'm letting that sink in but haven't gotten over the "they'll think I'm a pig" syndrome yet.

Peggy, when is your next class?

Lynne

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I corrected the website address above. It should have said www.messies.com.

I don't like Flylady very much - it's too silly and goofy for me. I like Messies Anonymous, though. It is a little more serious with lots of good tips and recognizes that changing our ways is a slow, steady process and something that we shouldn't expect to have immediate success overnight. I subscribe to a couple of the daily lists and enjoy it a lot.

Good luck!

Love,

Peggy

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I would definately beat myself up over it. I try not to let it get the best of me but I hate living in a messy house and my house is always that way. I used to live in a big 2 story with lots of bedrooms and 3 baths BTD (before the divorce). Now we all jam in a little ranch with 2 bedrooms and 1 bath. So with 3 kids, 2 dogs and 4 cats, plus the two neighborhood kids that spend the night when their family is having "issues" we are pretty crowed with junk everywhere. I do vacuum everyday (pet hair) and I try, I really try to keep the house picked up... but when my kids say come rollerblading with us mom I just shut the door and say the heck with it!

Although whenever someone visits I always feel bad that the house doesn't look nice... I just try to confirm them to one room!!!

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I have always kept my house '20 minutes to Pope ready' - meaning that if he should call from 20 minutes away, the house would look wonderful, (he can't look in drawers or closets).

Truthfully, when Earl and I got married, I asked him which half of the house he wanted to clean. The look on his face was priceless. I said, I am not working all day and cleaning at night. He said, have you ever thought about a cleaning lady. Have had one ever since, but now it is a cleaning man.

Hate housework, would rather pay for that and give up something else.

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The house for me isn't the problem. Got the cleaning down pat.....it's ME!

Now I can have a spotless house and be unkept MYSELF (baggy t-shirt, jogging shorts and ponytail) or I can look totally put together and the house look like a mess...... Ginny, love the cleaning MAN idea...think you can talk Rick into that?

8)

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Brian and I are two peas in a pod:

anal

obsessive

neatniks

but it is easy for us to live together.

We have never had to divide up the work or even discuss it. We just do what needs to be done to keep the house the way we like it to be.

We do get teased quite a bit, but we just accept that we are who we are and we are at an age that allows us our oddness.

There are a few natural divisions: I iron, Bri keeps the cars clean and gassed up.

I cook, he keeps the yard beautifully.

Even if Bri is having a sick day and I am stressed w/ TFS work and the house is a bit dissheveld.......you would all be welcome. We have learned, thanks to Lung Cancer, what is truly important and you guys are right at the top of that list.

(Everyone just knows 'how we are', even the grandkids pick up their toys without being asked and always carry their dishes to the kitchen and so on.)

Love

Pat

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Oh, man, am I out numbered here!

I tried the Flylady thing, and during the summer when I don't work I rock at it! Once school starts back up, though--we become cyclical cleaners.

We get everything in order on Saturday, but it deteriorates throughout the week. I swear we are never even home, with ball games, meetings, etc. all week, but we somehow manage to trash the place.

I have started a new system--in a few weeks I hope it will be in place. Until then, love me, even if you hate my house.

:) Kelly

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The hardest thing would be for someone to find me home :!: I used to really worry about things like having my house perfect. I would work from 5 in the morning until 11 at night cleaning, cooking and caring for my family. After 41 years of marriage I got the nerve to end it and when I did I found out that I don't need to have things perfect for people to like me.

When I am off on Saturday I go through and clean my house. I do laundry and vacum as well as mop and make sure most things are picked up and put away. The rest of the time my house is alright. It is not perfect but it is lived in. It is my home and I am comfortable. If someone comes to see me they had better like the way my house looks and feels. If they don't they can go find a house that looks better. They are not interested in me anyway if that is what they see.

Now I will say that I have seen some houses that are not just a little messy but filthy. When I say filthy you would not believe what I mean. I can't stand that and would die of shame if my home ever got even close to that. I think it shows a lack of self respect and respect for others.

By the way I dress good for work. Fortunately with my work I don't have to be anything but casually dressed. When I am home I go for comfort. Like my house if anyone doesn't like let them look the other way. Johnny taught me what is really important in life. What a change from how I used to be :!:

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Come on In!!! I am not obsessive about cleaning as my mom was, but i cannot even think about going to sleep at night unless everything is put up and or straightened. Bed gets made almost immediatly after waking, laundry is always done and put away, etc BUT I need to dust something terrible. Looks clean but would never pass the white glove test.

Kim

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