Here's my thinking....

[Daddys Little Girl @ 35!]

My thinking is this, when my dad passed away, I expected that the entire world should have stopped and paid their respects. After all, he was the Greatest Man Alive Ever right??? Well, then you come to understand as the grief continues that everyone around you is continuing to live their lives. And eventually you have to join the human race and start to live it with them because the more that you want to stay in that dark world of not moving forward, the more that you get trapped in the world of grief! Not a good place to be....

Now when I think I try to think of all the good that my dad did. I try to remember how proud he was of me and my daughter. I try to remember how happy he was to tell anyone of his family. And I think of how interested he always was in what others had to say. Truly interested, not just being polite like so many can do.

And more than anything, I remember how much I still love him and how nothing will ever take that away even if he is not in this world any more.

I think that my dad is now sitting in heaven with the angels surrounding him while he plays his sax for them. (This is a beautiful thought since he couldn't play for quite a while before he passed away -- it was too painful for him.)

Days have gone by now, they turned to months. Pretty soon we will get to the holidays and there will be this empty spot in the family where dad should be...but I have a family to get me through this time and I will try to focus my thoughts on this. I will try to focus on what my dad would have wanted from me.

And then I will turn on some of his Jazz music and smile as I think of that wonderful man...

And that is what I think today....since we are sharing and all!

[Ann]

What beautiful thoughts! Thanks you so much for sharing them with us. Isn't it so true about us feeling that the world should stop with us when we lose someone we love? I felt the exact same way and was often a bit upset when friends would just continue on with their lives like nothing had ever happened. I felt as if my world had ended and couldn't understand why everyone around me could still be living. Like you, I have come to understand that life is for the living and we must go on. I hope your life becomes easier for you. I got such a nice image of your dad playing that sax for all Gods' angels to enjoy! My Dennis loved jazz and blues...maybe he's listening!

[mamasbabygirl]

I remember when my hubby passed away, a few weeks after I went to a grocery store with my mom and I thought "how are all of these people just living and going about their business?" . It was a very strange feeling.

[Don Wood]

I think --- that you are beginning to heal. And that you are going about it in a very constructive way. Blessings. Don

[nancy c]

I do so understand. I feel I am still in the dark world, although I have traveled 2x since Mike died June 21.

I feel like I am going thru the motions, but not really living yet. I think it is very hard to see ahead and ever enjoy life again, but I know it will eventually come.

Some days I don't want to get out of bed. But, I have to. The pain in our hearts for our loved ones is unbearable at times. I just pray I can do this. God bless,Nancy C

[Kasey]

Mary,

I remember so many of your earlier posts. I think those, and this one today, absolutely pays the highest tribute there could ever be for any Dad.

You were lucky to have him, and he you. May the days turn softer for you and the holidays be full of many warm and happy memories.

Good to hear from you again.

Kasey