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loss for words....


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Here we go again.....I can't believe it has been 6 weeks since my Moms last CT scan. She has an appointment for another one today. In fact, as I'm typing this she is getting it done. How I wish I could be there with her, holding her hand and reassuring her that everything will be ok. We won't get the results back until December 7th. This scan will tell us if the avastin/taxotere has been working.

I spent the Thanksgiving weekend with my Mom and family. My Mom and I were talking and she said something to me that I just wasn't ready to hear.

She told me she was ready and that she had lived a good life. I was so shocked to hear those words from her that I didn't know what to say. I can't seem to get them out of my mind.

I'm a little emotional this morning....the roller coaster ride has again taken another turn that I don't feel comfortable with.

I know how powerful prayer is and was just hoping that anyone reading this might please say a prayer for her.

Thank you.

Continued prayers for all of you........

Hugs,

Melinda

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Melinda,

I am online right now and will certainly say a prayer for you and your mom -- that you will get favorable scan results and that you have some peace while you wait for the results.

Hang in there - the waiting game is no fun!

XOXOXOXXO,

Holly

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Melinda,

I know how difficult those words are. My husband told me last week he wants to finalize his funeral arrangements so I will not have to worry about it when the "time" comes. although his is doing fairly well right now, since he had mets to his brain he describes himself as a ticking time bomb.

Try and stay strong and I will pray for good results to your mom's CT scan

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((((Melinda))))) Praying for you, and for your Mom. I think... just like part of us starts to prepare for the what ifs, that your Mom is likely trying to make sense of the what-ifs and make peace with them. And she wants you to know that she is ok come what may. It doesn't mean the what ifs will happen.... Just that she wants you to know that she is ok. I know how very hard it is. It was so hard for me too. But it is GOOD that your Mom feels able to talk about these things with you. I can remember having conversations with my Mom in a very calm, rational manner and thinking later--HOW did I do that?

More ((((hugs)))) to you. Let us know when you know about the scans!

love,

Val

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(((((((((((((((((Melinda))))))))))))))))

Those are the words we NEVER want to hear from our loved ones.

Sometimes I think they are trying to prepare us, but in my life time I found I was never prepared. :(

Hang in there the best you can. We're here for you.

Fingers, toes, legs, all crossed for good scans for mom today.

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I don't have a problem with people saying they are ready to go and prepare their funeral. I think it is responsible behavior. It is better to do these things while one is relatively healthy. I do think you can say, "Glad you are prepared, but I am not ready for you to go yet." That takes care of their feelings and yours as well. Don

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Dear Melinda,

Thinking of you and your mom and hope for positive results.

I feel you concern and pain as this is probably the first she has brought this up.

You mom is just expressing her feelings in case there is a problem with the scans. That does not mean she will not beat this. I think it is more "what if" and she wants to be prepared so she can get it done so she can put that behind her. She does not want to become a burden on her family when the time comes. She wants everything in order. That will make her feel so much better.

Do not take that as a negative, but more of a positive as she wants to do this so she could have peace with herself.

I am praying for good test results... Hang in there. You are wonderful to you mom and she loves you so much.

Maryanne

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I can imagine the shock you felt. How jarring for you.

I've heard the same from my mom. I think it empowers her in a way, like that was a decision she is able to make for herself.

It bothered me when she made (and paid for) her own funeral arrangements, and then it bothered me to see her go through and "down-size" everything. I think she remembers going through her mother's things after she died, and having to do an auction of all of that stuff!

It doesn't bother me anymore, because I know now that these are things mom needs settled in her mind. These are things she can control. I'm not any nearer to being ready for her to go, but the 'prepartations' she is making don't bother me like they used to.

Hope her scans come back with good news!

:) Kelly

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Hi -

My mom and I have had the same discussion -- she tells me she is not ready to give up or go...but if God decides it is time, she is ok with that and wants all of us to be ok with it as well. I think she wants to be sure that nothing goes unsaid. She tells me that she has had a truly blessed life and blessed relationships with her family and friends...it kills me even to type these words....but to be honest, hearing these things actually helps me to come to terms with what is happening...yet doesn't discourage me as I know they are not words of surrender (although I am crying as I type this!)

Thinking of you,

Holly

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