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aging (R Rated)


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Onions and Xmas Trees


> A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, "Dad, how many

> kinds of boobies are there?" The father, surprised, answers, "Well son,

> there's three kinds of breasts."


> "In her twenties, a woman's breasts are like melons - round and firm."


> In her thirties to forties, they are like pears - still nice, but hanging

> a

> bit."


> "After fifty, they are like onions."


> The son looked confused, "Onions?"


> "Yes. You see them and they make you cry."


> This infuriated his wife and daughter, so his daughter said, "Mum? How

> many

> kinds of willies are there?"


> The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, "Well dear, a man goes through

> three phases."


> "In his twenties, his willy is like an oak tree - mighty and hard."


> "In his thirties to forties, it is a birch - flexible, but reliable."


> "After fifty, it is like a Christmas tree."


> It was the daughter's turn to look confused, "A Christmas tree?"


> "Yes. Dead from the root up and the balls are for decoration only."


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