Mr Ry Posted March 20, 2006 Posted March 20, 2006 THIS ONE MAKES MY EYES TEAR-UP, SUCH A HAPPY ENDING A couple had only been married for two weeks. However, the husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back." "Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife. "I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face. I'm going to have a beer," he said. The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the Refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 Different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc. The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar... you know... they have frozen glasses... " He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it. The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise. OK?" "You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, poppers and pork strips. "But my sweet honey... at the bar.... you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that..." "You want dirty words, Cutie Pie? LISTEN UP ! CHICKEN shi_! SIT YOUR *ss DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED *ss AIN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR! THAT shi_ IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKASS?" And, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story? Quote
cindi o'h Posted March 21, 2006 Posted March 21, 2006 Oh John!! This is the best one I have heard in a very long time...love it love it love it....A++++! Got me ta screamin' and peein' over here! Cindi o'h! Quote
SBeth Posted March 21, 2006 Posted March 21, 2006 Something about your first sentence John...just had a feeling. GOOD ONE!!!! That should score some points for the guys. Do we still keep track? Quote
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