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An update on us

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Well, as of today, we still have not heard back from the insurance if they are going to approve mom for therapy or leave her nearly frozen alive. She is still going to maintenance therapy Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday and SF is paying out of pocket for 1/2 hour of therapy MOnday and Friday. I am off tomorrow, so I will go do therapy with mom. We work on transfers with one person. We are having a hard time getting straight answers as to why mom's pain meds and steroid dosages have been changed when every Dr. says "I didn't order that" upon our asking. I hate the loss of control while mom is in their care.

Mom is doing pretty well. I took the boys over last night and they were pretty rowdy. Mom enjoyed it. They had us both cracking up with their antics. They created a bowling lane in mom's room and went bowling, knocking down a bottle of lotion, toys, and various other medical supplies from mom's room.

SF and mom are continuing counseling and it has been such a wonderful change in the way they communicate with each other. Mom still likes to complain to me when he leaves about how he hovers over her plate while she is trying to eat and petty things like that, but they are being much more respectful to each other. SF told me the other day that as much as he was dreading moving (he and my brother are now moving into my house too, jeesh!), he is looking forward to it. I asked him why and he couldn't tell me, but I hope that it is so that he can get on board with making memories and having mom back in our care.

The counselor is working with me to make sure that I am balancing my family with the time and effort I put into mom's health. I have been making more time to go to Red's games with John and my boys, dates with John (Granny silently in tow), and taking my boys to mom's nursing home less without guilt bc it is extraordinarily difficult to make them sit quietly in the waiting room while I do personal care things for mom. I have also taken a back seat role as far as the financial piece of all of this. The counselor is convinced that SF will step up if I don't take care of everything. So, when the home health care agency came to see mom, she gave us a resource book, which SF handed to me. When I left, I left the resource book and told him the net day that he could start with calling the KY Cabinet for Families and Children. He has not called, so I assume he is OK with paying for all of mom's care. It looks like it will be around $16 an hour when mom comes home, which equates to around 5K a month if we can't work out a schedule of people to help us. Even mom's BF has not been around or called for the past few weeks. My aunts and uncles visits are sporadic, sometimes going 2 weeks or so without stopping by to see mom. We all live within 15 minutes of mom's SNF. It makes me sad that people seem to have forgotten her. She never wants me to leave, but I have to. It is sad sad sad to me that families are forced to leave our loved ones in nursing homes. The residents yell at the top of their lungs all day every day for someone to help them. It makes me so uncomfortable and angry.

The house is still on schedule for closing on June 16th, so John calls my mom every few days with the countdown for her to come home. She is ready.

Well, I have babbled on enough. I always do. Thanks for listening and caring.

I am praying for so many of you right now. Missy and mom, you two are so special in my heart. I keep envisioning the sign in your and my front yards that says "For everyone who has helped and cared for mom during her illness, thank you. For the rest of you, you can kiss my *ss!" Pricelss, simply priceless.

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Lori...I am continuing prayers that the insurance company will do the right things and over turn their decision about your mom's benefits. I know that must be weighing so heavily on your mind right now. I have found that sometimes, when it takes a long time getting an answer, the answer is often favorable.

It sounds like things are going better for you and your mom right now. I think it's great you are finding some "Lorie-Time."

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Thanks for the update, Lori. It sounds like things are going as well as one could hope for right now -- I think Ann is right....may be a good thing that the insurance response is taking some time -- praying for a positive response.

Drat on the meds issue -- I am thankful that doesn't happen where we are; probably because my nose has to be in the middle of all of mom's meds because of the way her Rx benefit works!

Hugs to mom, you and your family,


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glad to hear from you on this rollercoaster ride. Always glad to get a little good news once in awhile ya know.

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Thanks for the update Lori. I'm so glad that SF seems to be trying harder, and that you are getting more in balance with being a caregiver and being Lori.

(((Lori))) Don't have much to say, just wanted to give you a hug and tell you that you are doing a great job for your mom. She must be so proud of you and love you so.

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Sounds like things are finally on their way to becoming a little more manageable for you. You've really had a rough go of it.

Good luck, your mother has been so lucky to have you for a daughter, she should feel proud to know that she did something very right in raising you


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I'm SO glad that things seem to be shaping up and heading the right direction!! Gives me hope that the insurance crap will straighten out, too!! *Crosses fingers and toes*

Thanks for the extra boost when I read this...we wish you nothing but the best and keep you both in our prayers. xoxo

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