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An Xray is showing the spot on mom's right shoulder blade to be a 3 cm lesion. Damnit. The stability of her disease has been what has held her on and kept the Drs. fighting for her. Her oncologist came to report that the radiologist will be there today and tell her what he recommends. They are also doing a pelvic, abdomen and chest CT scan today to rule out any other recurrence. Poor mom. I can't get her to talk. I can only imagine what she is thinking. She is beyond quiet and I am worried.

What questions should I ask?

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Dear Lori,

Don had an exceedingly painful met on his shoulder. He couldn't even use his arm. The met had destroyed part of the bone. But, the radiation completely eliminated the cancer and the pain and the bone completely healed back over and he was fine. It never bothered him again.

He had bone mets in lots of places that didn't give him any trouble at all and he never had to have radiation. Then, many months after the shoulder, the mets in one of his hips took off and one bone, I forget the name of it, the large middle bone, was totally filled with cancer and he had a lot of pain. Once again, radiation did it's job and he was fine.

I think that bone mets are just part of treating cancer like a disease. You just knock them out when they become a problem and move on. The more serious problems are, of course, when internal organs are involved. Most of them can't get radiation and usually have to be treated with chemo or some other way. I can't remember if your mom is currently on any chemo, but if the cancer has newly spread to her bones, she might need to have chemo to slow down or stop the spread.

If she has no pain in that shoulder, don't be surprised if they don't recommend radiation. They don't like to do it unless there is pain because once they do it, it becomes more risky to radiate that same area again.

Hang in there, kiddo!



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Oh Lori,

I am so, so sorry. I was so hoping for a reprieve and just some enjoyment now that Mom was home. I am so sorry. Maybe they will work something out, that won't be too invasive.

Dear Lord, please be with Lori and her mom and family right now as she works through this latest bump. I pray that you grant them peace, happiness, and comfort.

God bless,


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Lori...So very sorry. I'll be saying prayers that you will find just the right words to get your Mom back in good spirits. Just assure her this is just another little bump in the road and let her know we are all saying prayers.

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I'm so sorry to hear this, Lori.

Bad news is so difficult to digest....and can set us back until we can think it through. Stay positive and remind her that she is going to get through this.

Praying so hard that she can get a little good news to hold to today.

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Thats' not the news you all wanted to hear about now. :( I think you've got to wait to hear about the outcome of her complete ct and you know that they can give you a preliminary report asap. Hopefully it will just be another bump in the road, this is one of the things I hate about cancer, just when you think you can relax, you can't. It just seems like it is all time-consuming, and so so emotionally draining. Lets' hope that this isn't anything major and that the drs. can take care of it.

As far as your mom not talking, it's hard sometimes to talk about things, especially when you may think that is all you deal w/ in your life is cancer. She knows you are there for her.


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I'm so sorry Lori.

I remember too well that painfully quiet and scared look. Keith used to get that way all the time after bad news. He usually only let it get him down for one day though. Then he would be ready to tackle and conquer it. "what do I need to do to take care of this, and lets do it now".

Bone mets do seem to be treated well and maintained well with radiation. Possibly remind your mom of other success stories of those surviving long term with bone mets like our Lucie Wood. Also, ask her onc about Zometa to strengthen her bones and keep future mets from forming.

Much love


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Oh, Lori--that stinks!!!

It is so awful to see our Moms (or anyone we love) with 'that look' on their faces. I pray the doctors can find a good treatment plan to help out.

Your mom is a tough cookie--she needs some time to rebound. Last week I was devastated to see my mom crying, but at least I was glad to see her showing some of the true emotions of fear and anger, rather than holding them in.

You and your mom are in my prayers.


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K, results are that that the CT scan "looked pretty good" as far as no other hot spots. The Dr. does want to radiate the area, but mentioned that he thinks the spot is related to the bumps on her head. I was not there for this conversation, so I hate not being able to ask questions, like "Do you mean you think those are mets growing out of her head Dr.?" I waited for him to show up from 2:30-7:30. He was supposed to be there at 5. He showed up at 7:40, figures...

Mom was on Zometa while she was going through chemo, but she has been shuffled through so many Drs. that that RX fell off the list. I wonder if she had stayed on if this would have happened.

Mom's words are so slurred we can barely understand her. I wonder why-is this the brain metasases? I need to talk to her PCP I guess to get a feel for what all of this means. We are getting pieces of stuff here and there and the Drs. keep talking to Tom my SF, not mom. It is royally pissing her off. I told her to tell the Drs. to talk to her and Tom can be her second set of ears.

SF has not left mom's side, it is so weird. I think he learned a whole lot about compassion living with us bc he not been like this for a loooong time.

Thanks everyone for your support, especially you Carleen for reaching out to me. It means so much.

My love and prayers for us all.

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Your mom can get through this. The radiaiton should irraticate the met. I am glad nothing else showed up.

Sending prayers for her for strength to get through this. But with your help and your SF she will! I just know it.

I am sad to hear this as she was just getting comfortable settling in your home. Keep that positive attitude going.


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Well, this will teach ME not to check in for a couple of day! Damn, damn, damn is right! However...thank goodness they think the radiation will take care of it! (Not to mention all the experience saying the same from these wonderful ppl who've been there before!)

Lori...praying the treatment helps. So glad your sf is "getting it together" so to speak and being there...now if the dr.'s would treat Mom like a person instead of a "patient". *Sighs* Keep on their cases about it. Nothing drives me nuts faster than either Mom's doctor's or my daughter's passing them over as what i see as insignificant when THEY are the ones who are going through whatever it may be. Hope that the slurring straightens out, too...any more idea on what that might be?? When's Mom due for another MRI??

Crossing fingers that all comes out well in the end!!

Many prayers continuing for you, mom, and your whole family!! xoxo

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